The J-TAC (Stephenville, Tex.), Ed. 1 Thursday, October 3, 1991 Page: 2 of 10
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OPINION"
I can't do anything with $5
Homecoming
evokes memory
of special date
Pmanuel Alvear
Ionian
V?
on the Street
EDITOR - Julie Grider
ADVISOR - Charlie Reynolds The J-TAC
. MANAGING EDITOR - Christy Moore
FEATURES EDITOR - Tina Horton ; SPORTS EDITOR - Mike Marbach
PHOTO EDITOR - Marc Parks ADVERTISING COORDINATOR - Meredith Foster
STAFF WRITERS - Pmanuel Alvear, Kelly Boren CIRCULATION MANAGER - Justin Boswell
EDITORIAL CARTOONIST - Jordan Cannady
Around the Bene/
© 1991 by
J. Jordan Cannady
Homecoming always brings
back memories that I hadn't thought
of for years, and some that I think
could have gone a few more years
without me thinking about them, but
they come whether I call them or not.
I would like to share a Home-
coming memory from my early days
as a strapping lad from Big Spring.
Actually, I never "strapped," but I
always wanted jto try (provided I
found out what it was first); it sounded
like fun. ^ t
I have so many fond memories
of Homecoming, such as the year my
parents accidently bought a mum for
me instead of my sister. It wouldn't
have been so bad except my parents
decided to be generous that year, so
I nearly won a Biggest Mum compe-
tition. Luckily, one of the local flo-
rists had a daughter, and she had a
greenhouse strapped to ha- chest and
waist and harnessed in back. .
Then there was the year my sis-
ters date put the wrong name on her
mum. Of course, being the under-
standing, compassionate brother that
I am, I offered some words of en-
couragement like, "At least he got
the address right," and, "Put down
that knife, it might be loaded!"
No, those are not my best
Homecoming memories. My best
Homecoming memory has to be my *
' freshman year, in High School. It's ;
•not exactly a pleasant memory, but I (.
know I'll never forget it.
' I had a very special date that
year. She was from a nearby town,
and I'm still not sure exactly how it
happened, but somehow we ended
up on a date for Homecoming.
I was 14 and a freshman. Her
name was Brenda and she was a
senior. However, she was not JUST
a senior. At her school, Grady High,
she was a cheerleader, Student Body
President, Senior Class President and
Miss Grady High School. They
probably would have made her prin-
cipal if she had run for it.
In other words, I was
WAAAAAAAY out of my league.
Now, at this point, we come to
the big question: If this girl was so
great, how come she didn't have a
better date? The answer: She had
just resently broken up with her
boyfriend. I think his name was
Rufus or Bufort, or something like
that (Can you see this coming al-
ready?) We had met, and knew each
other a litde bit, and somehow, I
worked up the courage to ask her for
a date. Pretty crazy, but it worked.
Through mutual friends, and a
couple of short conversations, Brenda
found herself on a date with a fine
ypung man (That is, a fine young
man who didn't even have a driver's
license and had only resently started
shaving, every now and then).
We decided to take her car. It
seemed easier than having my par-
ents drop us off.
I went all out I spent almost all
my life savings on a spectacular mum.
I was lucky to have any money left to
buy the tickets to the game.
I went to my father for some
money in case anything came up on
the date, although the thought of
anything "coming up" on this date
made my stomach knot up.
"Oh, wise and ever brilliant fa-
ther," I said (He liked it when I called
him that, and sometimes he would
not respond to anything else). "Have
you any words of wisdom and/or
money for your first-bom son?"
"Margie," he said (He would
sometimes get me and my sister con-
fused. . . Remember the mum thing
in paragraph three?). "Here is five
dollars, I want my change back and
remember, this is Homecoming, not
Prom Night Don't lose your mind."
"I can't do anything with five
dollars!!!" I exclaimed (Hence the
(See Homecoming page 3)
A NEW PRODUCT FROM THE WOMAN WHO TURNED "EX" INTO EXCESS
\
Ei-i-ZAeerTH
TAYLORS
WIFE OF
(3ATH
betaps
Tarleton alumni, an asset to our campus
. -We;^s • the student body would like to
i Mve always
been a proud part of our heritage bringing
honor and recognition to our school.
Several alumni will be acknowledged
during this weekend's homecoming activities.
Colonel Edwin Dyess will be the first
posthumous . recipient of the Distinguished
Alumnus honor at, Tarleton. We should be
happy to have a great Air Force officer from
TSU.
Another Air Force officer, Major General
Christopher Adams had several military
accomplishments including serving on the Joint
Chiefs of Staff. Colonel Robert Ruff, a
successful Army officer, will also be
recognized.
, } Dr., Millie Hughes-Eulford, a payload
specialist aboard the Space Shuttle Columbia, is
returning to Tarleton to present the first class
ring back to Tarleton. The ring, which was the
first numbered class ring, flew into outer space
with Dr. Hughes-Fulford.
While these may be the only alumni
honored this year, there are many alumni who
have achieved accomplishments just as great.
Every year Tarleton produces a new class of
potential role models for future classes to look
up to.
Please take the time to stop and talk to the
alumni on campus this weekend. The students of
Tarleton will benefit from their experience and
the recognition they bring to our campus.
Around the Bend
© 1991 by
J. Jordan Cannady
A NON-OFmNS/VET
feuTfartLJ& C0&&EC.T' CftKfZ&O
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A HUSKY V&tC££> BA&eBsMJ-
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SeftViCt &US/4/ &4K 6V/T2/
WILL COME* "
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The J-TAC is published on Thursdays during the regular semester, with the exception of university holidays and
examination periods. The printer is the Stephenville Empire-Tribune.
Only articles in the Opinion section of this newspaper express the opinion of the J-TAC staff. Columns and/or news
articles do not necessarily express the opinion of this university or this newspaper.
Inquiries regarding deadlines may be made by telephone to: Editor: 968-9056; Newsroom: 968-9057; or the Faculty
Advisor: 968-9058. The offices of the J-TAC are located on the third floor of Davis Hall, rooms 303 and 304.
Hippy past
confronts
columnist
Jordan Cannady
Around the Bend
£
i
A*
I was walking my dog through
the park the other day when I bumped
into, a man who looked like he'd
, stepped out of my past Lothar (not
his real name) had long hair, a beard,
John Lennon granny glasses and wore
faded and torn blue jeans, a blue
chambray workshirt, moccasins and
matching leather laces-one around
his wrist and the other around his
head. He was the spitting image of
my best friend in high school, David
Lynn Gunther.
When I was in high school, the
hippy movement was in full flower.
We all wore clothing made of flags;,
ate nothing but crunchy granola and
water buffalo ghee and could, at any
given moment, recite the entire, lyr-
ics to "Alice's Restaurant" while sit-
ting in the lotus position (this is not
an oriental cafe).
We talked radical, ate radical,
sang radical and God help us-
smelled radical. In short, there in
Southern California in the seventies
we had taken pretentiousness and
pseudo mysticism to its penultimate
state.
Even the word Hippy comes
from the latin Hip meaning believer
in anything" And Py which means
naive as a pilgrim. -
Fortuiiatelyflhis era'ofduilMes
Travelers lasted only a short while.
All that remains are a hideous as-
semblage of wide bell bottoms, Nehru
jackets, love beads, George
McGovern and a generation of sev-
enties babies with names like Peace,
Lotus, Moon Unit and Yak Udder.
These children, their self-esteem and
psyche permanently scarred by their
Peyote-indulged parents now com-
pensate for the name abuse they
suffered by smacking their own kids
with names like Ralph, Bud, Ward,
June and the Beeve.
I thought those ghosts had been
properly exorcised until I met Lothar.
Lothar is a full time student who
hopes to receive his B.S. in herb
sciences with a minor in macrame.
At fifty-seven going on eighteen, he
lives in one of the last nine
Volkswagon Micro Buses in exis-
tence. His wife, Cinnamon Toast,
their son, daughter-in-law and two
grandchildren share the bus and the
adjoining geodesic pup tent. To
support themselves they sell hand-
carved soapstone pipes in the shape
of Erath County's own Moola and
occasionally rent themselves out to
organic apple orchards to help bring
in the cider makings.
Lothar kept staring down at my
Australian shepard Sammy (her real
name) thai up at me with Mansonian
malevolence. Finally, after an un-
comfortable period of time, I asked
him if he had a problem.
"You," he said, "are my prob-
lem." Now, I've heard this far too
many times on the third floor of the
Humanities building to have a thin
skin so I asked him what he meant
"I'm talking about that," he said,
as he thrust a bony finger by my nose
and pointed down at Sammy.
"Don't you like my dog?" I
asked. That set him off but good.
"That's not your dog!" he yelled.
"How would you like it if someone
put a collar and chain around your
neck for a while?"
I had to stop and think for a
minute in ease I'd actually once tried
it "I don't know. She doesn't seem
to mind it much." I meant what I
said. The only thing Sammy really
minds is when my wife and I get
bored and tape her ears to the top of
her head (Sammy's) and watch her
try to take it off without the benefit of
opposable thumbs.
(See Hippy page 3)
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The J-TAC (Stephenville, Tex.), Ed. 1 Thursday, October 3, 1991, newspaper, October 3, 1991; (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth141758/m1/2/: accessed July 18, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Tarleton State University.