The Fort Worth Record and Register (Fort Worth, Tex.), Vol. 9, No. 346, Ed. 1 Tuesday, September 26, 1905 Page: 4 of 10
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■ ,■
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THE FORT WORTH RECORD: TUESDAY MORNING, SEPTEMBER 26, 1905.
esesenei
Oievs anartetties
companies’ donations te the Republican
campaige
at this late
duty and prosecute the culprits or grant them that, date is that beLore
75
the election the Republien,
.7*
PeI campaign funds, and in paying their premiums they
Zh
LANDIS.
OVER THE WIE.
Wi
Fa
The Seat of Inquiry.
*1
Y:
paying the price exacted by the sehedule of
Tates, the girl
could hardly snap him off the sine.
He never asked her
P. H.
he thought we was goin" to be with the
b
ratesonraw material, neces-
T
X
4)
of the
Hight votes common to southern states.
ft would be
Th
be
selves.
"And have you got any complaints to make?
"Have you been drinking, sir? demanded the old maid.
Snapp.
hit
la
pnd oonscie
to call for his resignation.
*
And’yot a tew
of corrupting American voteru
ci
• nil
w
. 457
toss
bald-headed man never has; they
that something else he never has
funds and
tor che
ha
i r i
: $80
a
N
c
■id
l io
The Indiana editor who bought a lion to keep
Indiana poets away from his office annouces that
the lion is dead, but that he will get a bigger and
fiercer lion.
I M
as:
on
sin
I
“Going to ma
you were just fill
“So did I."
W:
sli
ba
ize
wk
stan€.
In Chic
In Hoc
"She is worried about her fiance; she fears he
has concussion of the brain.”
"Did he meet with an accident?
"Yes, her father kicked him out the other night.”
i I
in
|
If brains could only be manicured there would be
more polished people in the world.
The doctors say that consumption is one thing a
"Ne’m."
"I thought
I
■
of
:b
wa
ag
ovl
pal
res
' • I
1 I
he wae Eakine true
m Senator Hanna’a hanas
Entemed at the Postotfice at Fort Worth as aecona
olues mau mauer.
"Here’s a Georgia man who who says the Georgla
peach lead, the wmH,"
"He ts doubtlese mtes-ted."
tre
ins
c0l
11
1 1
Alaska to different trim that at Arizona or New "
MTexico, for instance, but that does not alter the
Curious.
"Here’s a story of a man who contested his
mother-in-law’s will."
"What did she die of?"
“She wasn’t dead."
"What hoeptal did they take him to?"
He Got Left.
"There’s no mistake about it. It makes a fellow
feel chesp to get left."
"Oh, I don’t know: I got left $100,900 in my
uncle’s will and I feel rather proud."
He Must,
"What makes. you believe he loves her so de-
votedly ?"
"Well, he saw her in her bathing suit, and that
was before his proposal, too."
When a man gives his seat in the street car to
n lady tt means he is willing to hang himself for
her sake.
The wicked stand in slippery places, but the
good fall down.
Sometimes a man is 80 full of enthusiasm that
he gets himsef auspected of being full of something
else.
Figures do not lie. but pads sometimes do.
When a redheaded man becomes bald does he
also lose his re-headed temper?
The fact that a man follows his natural bent does
not prove him to be crooked, necessarily.
The bliss that is a part of ignorance is caused by
the fact that Ignorance is ignorant of its ignorance.
Girls like to believe that no man can understand
BEST HOTE IN THE WORLD.
London Saturday Review.
Having run over nearly the whole woria, we are oe
opinion thut the bewt hotel in which the fastidious traveter
can hang up his hat is the Oriental Palace at Yokohama.
■■Mb Offiee .......................
Mddtorinl Rooas ....... ..............
THE Ecep ON SALE.
r—MS 0F SUBSCRITION.
DAILY.
“Tainted money, tainted money," gee!
What er racket ’bout the truck.
D llar looks so good ter me
Wish er million jest ter luck.
Money’s buHy. jest er tool
Sorter helpin’ fellers be er fool.
eruth da, that all the great ufe companles
Fatal.
"How did your wife come to die?”
"She was taken suddenly sick.”
"YesT"
"And the neighbors sent for me and for the
doctor."
"‘Weflf"
"Well, the doctor got there first.”
E TAINTED MONEY'.
falated money, tainted money," say!
Mister, don't yer like the "dough?"
Hurt yer feelin’s, codger, jay?
Kinder guess yer somethiu” slow.
Money's bully, jest ter pass.
Sorter helpin” fellera be an aw.
It Costs.
The man who went not roving
All the summer is a crank;
But the chap who went a roving
Has no money in the bank.
Getting Back at Him.
"Yes, he's going to give the boys a blowout;
better come along, he always gets te best of
booze."
"Nope: I'm going to cut him out; he has now ar-
riyed at that stage where booze is always getting
the best of him."
The Atference between Rualan and Jap as aptly
Mustated in their method of expreaslon. 9^,
2elb Dhe mikado with petttfons ana mhe other huri.
• bom at the czar.
Dimes ter me is same s raWs.
Fort Worth.
DAtLY AND sua-WEEKLX.
BY TUB B B c O B D <O B F A M Y.
oruw Corner ritia and Rusk sea_________
Directors: dlarence Onsley, C. W Hutchiaon, J. W
pencer. N Narding. Wm. a Newby and D. T. Bomar,
ort Worth; R M obnstoa, Houston.
Clarence Ousley. President: Chalmers W Hutchison,
A New Tork husbana called his wite over the
telephne and requested her to Isten to the shot
"hach he vent crashing through his brain. T
not every husband who is possessed ot euch a
delicate consideration for his wire.
Tbe Record can be found at tbs news stands and
hotei reading rooms as follows.
Is New-York: At the Hotel Normandie and Empire
Rotel
in New Orleans, La.: At ths St. Charles Hotel news
congTess at the southern stata because
It the Republican congress should make a re-
apportionment and reduce the representation In
in a voice full of carpet tricks and pounded glass,
"N-n-ne-o! stuttered Mr. Williams, after a great effort.
"Then you are going to have paresis and had best con-
suit a doctor!"
Mr. Williams withdrew and went over and sat down in
Ths Record did not suegest or intimate that the
meermen should refuse to eupport Danas ana
Cautre to making a mighty tn„ whh France, but
" tar he han been Miooting hot air mostly.
Not Rheumatism.
Looking happy, am I? Well, I should ray so;
And in my place you’d look happy, too.
I am full at fierce aches from my crown to my toes.
All croseways and endway. and through
My body they run and then down to my feet
And torture me there till I shout
But Tm happy the doctor has just gone away
After telling me I have the zout.
When specificattons for the czar's new navy are
writtenIt wil be wel to embody a condition that
the ere to be seaworthiy oven in the face
or the Japa
Entirely Selr-Mnde. N
“Tee. sir. he to the greatest pugilis of the age.
and never took a lesson in his ire."
"Why, he to advertised aa having token lessons
from John L?"
“Oh, you mean boxing lessons' I meant in elo-
cutinn."
The newspmper men are telling of a Naw York
manwhtowns a diamond weighing 460 carats.
About tiie only connection the newspaper men ever
have with diamonds is to tell about them.
might have added .
la hair.
Tainted money, tainted money," goose!
Don’t yer know yer off yer "nut?”
aroney’s jest er thing fer use.
It Isn’t er IF, it isn’t er BIT—•
Money’s bully, like er pole
Jumpin' fellers ‘eross er hole.
Immunity and protection which the campaign con-
tributions were designed to purchase?
So long as the crimes of McCall and others re*
main- unexpiated. "Xylie" and its agents need-not
try to gull the public. ' Kylie’s" policy holders in
Texas are fully competent to judge for themselves
just what contributions they desire to make to the
She Fooloa Him
rry ths wieow! Why J thought
•tar can never know what tranquility real
brfnga until he provides for no neceseity for
. r internal body.
’ PROFITAILE EEOIPRoOrTI.
Philadelphia Record.
By latest accounts the mutual insurance companies in
New York are not operated on the mutual plan. It is
only the directors of the companies that act toward one
another on this reciprocal plan when it comes to a distri-
button of spoils
I Tampering "Wih rites
BY J M LEwIS
L______
The principal explanation why President Roose-
velt did nut demana the return of the insurance
■ ■ - . . ... . . "I—I have done considerable telephoning to this office
them. when. In tact. they cannot understand them- during the past year."
campaign committee needed the money.
KEtOHD TRAVELING AGENTS.
folowng travelng represetstrves areeutner-
ne to receipt for subscriptions and advertisements :
g* Fay hingsbury, t f Gaibraith. E a %. Par-
Any erroneous reflection upon the character. stand-
My or reputation of any person, firm or eorporation
hich meay appear in the columns uf The Record will
be glaly corrected upon its being brousht to the
attestion of the management
TELEPHONES.
fund before the election Instead of
-
"Tainted money, tainted money,- sich
Never found er pocket, van
Fellers mean and proud and rich, •
Them are TAINTED. ITS THE MAN
Money’s bully, the feller taints.
The zemetrotats are again meeting in r.—E.
eer Copy .................................
tow Month ................................
Tharee Mnths (by mall if paid in advance).
Ria Mentha (by mall if paid in advance) ....
Taelve months (by mtl if paid In advance)
_ SUNDAY.
Tweive Months (by matt)..................
fh monthis {by ma J)......................
Four Months ‘by ........................
President Roosevelt will complete his summer so-
Jouru at Sagamere Hill next Saturday. No doubt
dhe whckos ett the big stick win resound through
Washington when he reaches the capital.
GIVING ALASKA ns m e.
Word comes from Washington that Speaker-to-
hr Cannon contemplates the appointment of a new
committee, to which all bills atrecting Alakn shall
be referred. Heretofore such proposed legislation
Ims been passed on by the committee on territo-
ries. Which has usually been too busy with matters
nearer home to pay much attention to Alaska. It
is the idea to head off with thia committee the
arguments in favor-of a delegate from the northern-
most territory, and to at the same time give “Uncle
Joe” a wider field whereon to sw his desirable
conamtatee assignments.
Leaving the politics of the matter out of the
question. It appears that such a new committee
might be a good thing for Alaska, just as the
special committee on the District of Columbia to
undoubtedly a necessary thing to the district. But
it should not in any way be permitted to interfere
with the plan to give Alaska a delegate in congress
and thus put it on the same footing as the other
territortes. True, the form of government in
An Adaptation.
Phiihdelphia Press.
“Let me see," said the forgetful man, "what’s the root
of that saying about "too many cooksT*
"Well," replied the man who had just returned from
Parts, " too many Cooks spoil the enjoyment of other
tourists.’ ”
doine merely whet the Galvesteh-Dalas News aa-
xocated long before Crumpacker or Olmsted
thought about it. And, mind you, the News to
Mosul—exultant, in fact—that it has advocated
such a thing.
BY ROSE ELLEN THOMAS
When Jim I,., the village carpenter ana a widower.
r - -
-rldThmua""tiap.on, "alursanaavmererrneszna
things went La Sr, "an onrome wItu “ 2elhBor, an
Molly Ie was „ gin or twenty, ana if she haan
marrird before her father’, death it was not because ol
lack of opportunity Why she didn’t was her own arfair
( Why she Rtended strietty to business afterward and lad
i bean was also her own artair. but the village. 9 winked
by and“2 te ech other and said “ wouia come arouna
At Stapleton, twenty-eight n.iles away. Jan.es Williams
opened^ Store about the time Mr. Lee died. He had much
selephonine to, do in rarious directions, and he called up
Sandsvilie at least once a day. When he heara th) p
voice over the telephone he lkcd the sound or t The
more he heard of it, the better he liked it.
As he was a bachelor, and as he was charged with nav.
ingan exe open for a wite, 11 would not have been strange
nadshe wuitento a Itiena at Sandsvine to inzroduce him
to that girl with a sweet voice in the telephone •rce hut
he did nothing of the kind. He could afve steppea aboara
the train any day and gone and seen for himself, but he
did not de that.
Bachelors have their romances as well as young men
and maidens He built up a romance around the "Helio!"
\oico, and after a few weeks he would have wanted to
knock the man down who destroyed it for him When
there Was no bvin^ on the Sandsvilie line to call for
hia opening the telephone, he made excuses to do so. He
felt he must hear that voice at least once a day. and when
he found his romance growing he smiled to himself.
By and by thie messages over the wire were uot'sli lly
confined to business, according to regulations. The bache-
lor opened conversations on general subjects, and as he ras
RATES AND MANUFACIL KES.
A rather remarkable statement was made the
•i day by a gentleman at Denison. He had
teoked over the field there with an eye to the
establishment of a cider factory. The location was
edli that coul be desired, the money was available .
the market at hand and the whole outlook was rosy
an i pregnaat with success: It looked as if another
er - rprise was about to be born to a future all
righi with profit as a prenatal gift.
But before the deals .could be closed they were
det lared off with a snp because of the impossi-!
bllity of aeswring raw material at a rate which
rendered its importation possible. Texas does not
yet grom eneugh appies to supply cider factries
mth her surplus fruit, so the apples would have to
cow from the orchards of Missouri. The rate
McCall felt, no doubt, when he received th**
election returns that the "nightmare" was over
and that "the sun of a new day” was shining in
his face. There, are some "Democrats” of th*'
same stripe in Texas.
den: nded by the railways for this service, was such
tht the falure of the enterprise was foreordained
end its promotar promptly abandoned it
This is a service over which the Texas railway
uormission hns no control, unfortunately, and it
wouid seem tbe railways are not yet ready to re-
verse the present order of thing by hauling raw
malerialsinteTTexas and the manufactured pzodu
eul In this the state is unquestionably suffer ins
rom th habit of the railway rate-makers, who
prefer the btrd in the hand and whose earnings
wr doing nicely as they are. If what the Denison
enit says ts true, and there appears no occasion
te doubt Us authenticity, then indeed has the state
• treat bardie to leap before it can find a smooth
track to its Mimate destiny. So ions as we have
t buy our ananuactured products and sell our raw
w. frri^ wo Teng will we be paying a tribute which
w- i suetesfully dwarf the most titanic effort to
become truly great.
Fit The Record does not believe the case in
pont at Dentson is illustrative of conditions
taroughout Texas. There are too many micoetwful
manuartnring enierprises in Texas to accept such’
ar idea. But the remarkable and regretable fea-
tu of tht sitwralion is found in the fact that even
ri enterprise is denied the state because her rail-
The Worid Goes Round.
"It is iove that makes the worid go round.” •
' That accounts for it."
"Accounts for what?"
"The fact that the woman who loves Jinx is suh
a dizzy blond."
We see thess a story gein‛ the rounds of the
press to the effect thef our feller Press Humerist
John D. ordered two gals of budge not long ago,
an* we want er explain thet John done it because
at his house: but we didn't meet with 'em. th'
gettin” o‛ passes an* things sort of headed us off.
It sure looks bad for a country when the pro-
prfetor of the ony irrigation paper in it can’t ait
passes ter carry him out of it. However, we didn’t
miss much, two gallon ain’t so many an’ we kin
almost always git our skin full right here in
Alkali.-Alkali Eye.
Che on Wortn Recor
an REGASTER.
REMODIIANG FAMOUS CHAMBER
Annapolis, Md.—The work of remodeling the senate
chamber in the old state house at Annapolis, the room
of national historic izterest as the scene of the resig-
nation of General Washington's military commission,
has been practically completed, and it is said to be onH
of the most accurate and Interesting pieces of historical
restoration ever achieved in the country. The work
has been- under the direction of the architect, Josiah
Pennington, of Baltimore, aided by the state building
commission and a specially appointed commission of
architects and historians. After careful research every
important detail of the old chamber has been fixed upon
practically with certainty and reproduced minutely.
e The senate chamber was reconstructed in 1876 in
order to obtain additional room.
The event with which the room is always associated
took place Dec. 23, 1783, though this was not the only
event of national significance connected with it, for
there the treaty of peace which ended the war with
Great Britain was ratified Jan. 14, 1784, and there
(Sept. 11 to 14, 15 76) sat the delegates from the six
states in the meeting which led to the calling of thy
federal constitutional convention of 1787.
Fillup Fillips,
It is the man who waits for a chance to begin
at the top who always remains at the bottom.
TABIOID l’HILOSOPHY.
Philadelphia Record.
A clove in the pocket is worth two on the ’ r ti.
Lending an umbrella is a kindness that isn’t always
returned.
Baseball is played on the diamond, but the umpire
should be on the
A man is nore often known by the company he keeps
than by the taxes he pays.
Wigg — What is the actors’ fund? Wasg -I never
knew an actor who had any.
Sifus—you believe that love is blind Cynicus--
Yes* if the girl is rich.
Teacher—What are the products of the river Nile?
Tommy Tuffnut—Nihilists.
You must be in debt to a man or married to a woman
before you really know either.
Old jokes are like old coins. The dates get worn off
and you can't tell how old they really are.
A rural exchange says it is time for husking bees
Why on earth should anyone want to husk a bee for
X tu
Chicago News.
Tall Editor—I bear Bumseribe to running a snappy
column in your paper now. Is tt the personal column?
Short Editor—No. It to entitled “All About Dogs,"
That to why we call it snappy.
the shade on the grocery nteps, A bob-tallea tag came
along and tried to make friends with him, but he would
not respond. One of the hogs sauntering about the viage
streete apprached and grouted amiabla but was klekea
nt in response. The grocery man camo out. and. rubbig
his hands together, observed that he had just laid in a new
stock of crackers and herring, but the bachelor never even
thanked him for calling hi. attention to the fact.
By and by, When the cold chill of atsappointuent l ad
pass'd away, he got up and walked to the depot and took
the train for home. Hie romance had been shattered and
buried, and he felt email and mean over tL There was
only one thing left to' wonder over. How on earth could
that eld maid have disguised her voice as she had when
talking with him? He theught the over matter tor two
or three days and then dismissed it
During the next two weeks ths merchant' had eonsidet-
able telephoning to do, but none of it was in the direction
of Sandsville. Not once was that otAce called up, and
there was a nvlag -at at least $3 on tolls Then there
came a day that the ofRee had to be called up. and as the
bachelor took down the trumpet he made mp hia mind that
if it was possible te do se he would give that old mold
a rap.
-Tea.' this is Sanasville." came the answer, in a voice
that made Maa sump. It was the clear, sweet voice he had
been nceustomea to.
“I waa» he began. Bad then etopped.
Tar
"I want Jackoea’s dry goods store after awhile, but just
now I want eemet hind elme."
question. At present Alaska has no representation
whatever in congress, while even Forte Rico has a
resident commissioner entitled to all the rights and
privileges of the territorial delegates. It is argued
that the proposed new committee would give Alaska
the same advantages as the committee on the
District of Columbia gives the district, but that to
obvtousdy not true, because the district committee
to at aU times accessible’ to the district commie
sioners or other officials, who may present their
views, ask for needed legislation and in other
ways make their Influence felt A committee on
Alaska would be an entirely different thing, for rep-
resentatives of Alaskan interests could only appear
before it after a journey which is long and tedious,
and at some periods of the year quite impossible.
The objection to a delegate from Alaska on the
ground that the great size of the territory woma
make it Impossible for any one man to impartially
represent all its interests to not well founded.
Burely a delegate, even though be resided in the
southernmost corner of the territors. would know
snore about conditions in the eastern edge, for in-
stance. than would a committee made up of con-
Eressmen from various states.
In simple justice to Alaska congress should pass
a law giving it representation. There is no nor-
titular objection to the proposed new commit tee.
perhaps, but its creation should by nn mrana be
permitten to interfere with the provision ror «
delegate direct from the territory itself.
name, but he betrayed an interest that brought the blush
to her cheek as she carelessly responded: Ye 3." “I see.w
“I guess •o” "Indeed."
Sometimes he left his telephone open and sang. It* was
always a sentimental song, and the Riri at the other end
of the wire knew that the words were meant for her. At
first, when addressins her, he had calied her after the
name of the town. One day he glided.zway from that end
called her "Girly." She was going to reprove him. but he
was in a hurry and she put it off. The reproof never
reached him, although he was considered an impudent
fellow to keep on making us*- of the term.
For a year the bachelor hugged his romance to his soul.
Then he made up his mind to look for something more
material. He put on his Sunday suit one day and went
down to Sandsvilie. Any one on the street would have
told him that Mias Molly Lee was in charge of the tele-
phone office, and would probably have added that she was
the boot looking1 girl in town, but he asked no questions—
not even where the omfice was. He strolled around until
he found it to himself, and he kept saying as he stroled:
"Jimmy Williams, you are making an idiot of yourself.
Of course, 'Girly is an old maid and bomely as a hMge
fence, and you will get snapped up in great shape for yur
cheek. Better go back and keep your illusion.’*
But he entered the telephone office instead, and the
first glance at the woman behind the desk sent his heart
flown into his boot* Just as he had feared, she was an
old maid.i She was an old maid who was having trouble
with a soft corn that day, and a man who stuttered had
just left the office after vainly seeking to send a message,
and she did not like the way the man from Stapleton
looked at her. . .
"Wellr" she blurted out as she stood there, looking
around in * helpless way.
"Nome is Williams, of Stapleton,” lie answered.
"Well, what of that?
do not anticipate any such use of the mobey by
insurance officgls.
It is quite-ciearthat congress _ cannot afford Jo.
longer defer legisiation governing national cam-
paigns. Campaign eommittees will have to be eub-
jetted to rigid scrutiny and compelled to observe
good morals both in the collection and distribu-
tion of campaign funds. Every dollar collected
hereafter should be made a matter of record, and
so should its disbursement. Heavy penalties should
be Imposed where such flagrant crimes like Mc-
Call’s are committed. And the country win ex-
pect some stirring language on the subject from
President Roosevelt in bis forthcoming message
tn congress.
have been conducted in a moot lax manner. False
b-xfifissging, syndicates, graft, nepotian ana cor-
rupt particpation in politics have been common.
There is no telling just how many millions of policy
holders’ money have been wasted, stolen or di-
verted to improper uses, and it is doubttul tt the
most right investigation can possibiy elicit the in-
formation.
It is clearly shown, however, that the New York
laws have been flagrantly violated. The question
now te, will the Republican officials in New York,
who have been, either directly or indirectly, bene-
ticiaiies of these campaign contributions, do theiri
Two Lng-Felt Wants.
"A wireless telephone wonld be a great
wouldn’t ftr"
“Yes; so would a noiseless graphophone.”
“What is itr
"Have— have you got two voles?"
“Why, of course not. What a funny question."
"Is there two of you, thenr"
“No. 1m al alone here."
"Well, ri be jiggered!" he exclaimed to himself, but he
heard a giggle from the other end of the line, and the
kame voice be liked to hear said:
“Shall I call up the store now?”
“Not yet. Say, I was down at Sandsville the other day."
"Yes?"
"I called nt the telephone office."
"Did you?”
"And you wanted to know if I had been drinking."
"Oh, Mr. Williams."
"And when I said no, you advised me to consult a doctor
for paresis.''
"Did she say that? I’m sorry. I was ill for a week and
had to get Miss Andrews to take my place, and she is
pretty short with people?"
"And it wasn’t you in Lhe office that day?”
"Ofeourse not.” ____________
Then—then---“
"Then you want th store?"’
"Net by a Jugfull. I want you, and I shall be down on
the afternoon train?”
“But Mr. Wiliams---“
But Mr. Williams was hurrying to the depot to cateh
the train, and an hour later was in Sansville. Three
moaths later he got what he came for, and everybody snys
it was a good match.
(Copyright. 1905, by K. A. Whitehead )
Whtle "Democrat" MeCai to so proudly beasting
A •’ I*" In the deteat of Bryan, which consisted
chim of oontributing somebody else’s mones to
• orruption fund, a to fair to state that ha wu
nw atway •• tmdarterent to the obhigattons waden
uon Dhom who handle other people’s money.
On the oocaslon at the Oalveston dlsaster in |Ma
the year of Boon* loot candidacy, we are tntormed
Ehet Mr McCau was appealea to for a contribution
Srom toe oompmiy far the benemn of the sutterera.
He peplled rocretruily that the money ot ehe acew
TTomk Idle erne a truet fund to be admtnasterea Eor
ehe benefit of widow* and orphans and ehat he
haa no right to ansbutse It sof the purpom mug-
•htod.
POINTED PARAGRAPKIS.
Chicago News.
A man tips the scales when he drops a pet ny in ths
slot. •
Many a man on the water wagon never saw a'sprin-
kling cart.
Figures may not lie, but figures of speech are often
mislending.
Some men's natural bent seems to be patterned after
a corkscrew.
Ignorance is supposed to be bliss, but it isn’t even a
good counterfeit. .
Girls think that old bachelors don’t understand women,
but widows know better:
Talk is cheap, but like Other cheap things it is apt to
prove expensive in the end. —___ ’ •
A pessimist is a man who knows a lot boutihimseie
end but little about his neighbors. ~ - -
A woman runs almost as fast when she sees a modes
as a anan does when he hears a baby crying. *
The millennium will be due when women are paid*
wages that will enable them to - support husbands as
they should be.
WHAT DID SHE MEAX?
Chicago News. .
Reggy Sapp—By Jawge, doncherknow. Miss Wose just
for a lark looked at me through the small end of her
opera glasses and said I looked awfully smau.
Miss Pepper—But why did she have to look throngh
the small end, Reggyr
""Teinted money, tainted money," gad!
____Folks is techy, cards that win.
Build ir chureh; it mganes me maa
Seein" folks er choosin” "tin.”
Money's money: H haint no harm
Made on fists er big, long arm.
■ ■ — <---------
THE "NYLIC* SCAXDAL.
The life insurance agencies may send out to
26 its and volicy holders circulars declaring "Dem-
ocrat ’ McCalla testimony to have been masterly,
but there is no mistaking public opinion on the
eubject McCal has convicted hlmftelf of a grows
breach of trust, and ths people are merely waling
to tee how long it will be before the directors of
the company are sufficiently stirred to conmcience
pun: news stanS
in Eureka Springs Ark.: At the Post Office news
satd.
In Denver, Golo . At the news stand at the Union
Sttion. ’ .
In Atlanta, Ga..: At the Pie&mont Hotel.
It St Lous, Mo At the Southern Hotel and Union
St3tion news sran.
In Salt Lake City, Utah: At National News Agomc
in > os Angoen, Cahr.: At DNnra News Compnny’s
stand
in San Francisco, Calif.: At N. W. Wheatly news
i rtd
in rortlaud. Orc : At G. B Taney’s news stand.
At the Palmer House news stand,
ps. Ark.: At the C. H Weaver Com-
That is, I----I
o v
News In denouncing them as grafters beeause thes
had accepted oourtesles at tM» raliroads. u Demo-
imUc congresamep and legiatators aaa puns-a-a
Galveston and Dalls, tor the eins of tbt Newt
those towns wouia have aufterea greatty ana an-
>ustly. The News seems to ba incapable of con-
*trueting any sort of argument until it has cooked
uP some bare falsehood upon which to base it.
earliy imaported, which would render competnion
possTVie with products manufactured in compettng
states an consumed in-Texas. - It to reasonabie to
sugacse the Denison case is not an isolated one and
ton* there ere ethers. If there be others, a way
should lx found, and Lound quickly, to apply the
Femnedy that Texas may be free and untrammeled
vhe she stratchae herself to grow.
___ " SEMI-WEEKLY.
Tweive Moaths ..............................
az axeethas .................................
sumplee fire o apptacation.
ubacribers aesiring the address of their pal
tour xetl wau piease elate in Ebels communicat
Barb the old on a the new address
- The Treaty. ,
Let. the whole world rail the treaty of peace 47
I BUMP of-Oyster Bay;------—____-
The.paper that calls for the warring to cease,
he treaty of Oyster Bay;
The.paper that. Roosevelt helped them to frame,
f keiped is a joke; he was the wholergame)
rhe Paper that brought him such wondrous acclaim
The treaty of Oyster Bay.
What is it that crowns him the new dove of peace?
The treaty of Oyster Bay;
O‛er it the envoys all gabbled like geese.
The treaty of oyster Bay-
W bo was it came down wit a whoop and a roar
And forcem them to sign it and gabble no more?
You have probably guessed, "twas our own Theo-
dore.
The treaty of Oyster Bay.
Hurrah! for the dove witb a horror of wur.
And the treaty of Oyster Bay;
Hurrah! for our oniy, our own Theodore
And the treaty of Oystex Bay;
Th/ nan who went down in a submarine ship,
Who’s here to give kings of all nations a tip
That hen the whole thing with the world on the
hip.
Oh, the treaty of Oyster Bay!
A • .
Did he do it because of his iove of sweet, peace.
The treaty of Oyster Ray; e
Oh. ha-ha! oh. ho-ho! Stop joking me! Cease!
The treaty of Oyster Bay:
He did it because of no aim quite sublime.
Not because he thinks warring a stupendous crime;
But because of his wish to be "k” all the time—
The treaty of Oyster Bay.
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The Fort Worth Record and Register (Fort Worth, Tex.), Vol. 9, No. 346, Ed. 1 Tuesday, September 26, 1905, newspaper, September 26, 1905; Fort Worth, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth1498590/m1/4/: accessed July 17, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; .