The San Antonio Light (San Antonio, Tex.), Vol. 40, No. 60, Ed. 1 Friday, March 19, 1920 Page: 6 of 24
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6
THE SAN ANTONIO LIGHT.
(Fovadsa January 1»»D
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pat! teat too OHMa: Kaa WMIt Tratla St rest
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CMr carrier. Saaday only * “
Malt ria Tsissl dally and Sunday.. .M tl*
{toll rut Texas! Bunday only M
Stou outal'io Texas ineludins Mexico 34 t** *•*"
Itoi! “teide Tea.. (Sunday rti.y) aa "
H io important whan daairlna Ute addtw of your
paper cdtanped. te gHe tartb old and n«w addresses.
Okoutd Salivary be Irregular. pteaaa notify the office.
Telephone Crockett ITU.
Ure Baa Antonio Ught la on ealo at hotels and news-
ftjMs tfiToufheut the United State*.
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Hu Aaaoclated Preee la excluxlvely entitled to the
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•t ar not etberwiw credited In thia paper and also the
local Bove publlahed herein. All righta of republic*-
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- SbwDEN'S POOR SHOWING.
■ ^governor Lowden of Illinois candidate
for the Republican presidential nomination
has gained a few votes in Virginia but the
result of the Minnesota primary must be a
severe blow to his hopes.
Lowden is a Minnesota man by birth
and it was to be expected that this would
get him something in the Gopher State.
However it seems to have lost him every-
thing. He ran behind Hoover who in one
•ense is not running at all and who has
never claimed to be a Republican. If that
is the best Lowden can do in his home state
he would better pull out of the race right
now. for all the chance he has left now is a
chance to trade what strength he has for
something like the vice-presidential nomina-
tion or the ambassadorship to London or a
place in the cabinet.
It is interesting to note that Hiram John
son is greatly displeased with the action of
the Minnesota voters. He says it was the
work of the state machine and that the
people did not have a chance to vote. Hiram
is pretty much of a machine man himself
and has about one of the best oiled little
things of that kind that was ever seen in
the United States. It operates in California
and how well it works can be realized when
the returns in tlie last presidential election
are considered. Hughes lost the state by a
few votes but Johnson carried it by more
than tooiooo. All of the Johnson votes could
haye : been thrown to Hughes if the John-
son machine had desired to have them go
that way.
Johnson knew all about the Minnesota
machine. If he did not he has lost the great
political knowledge he has always shown
heretofore and of course he has not lost it.
If. therefore. Johnson knew of the existence
and strength of the machine he should
have made every effort to bring it to his
side.
Then too. the weather was of the variety
that helps machines. It was cold and a gale
was blowing. There was rain hail and snow.
In such weather as that the average voter
that is. the independent voter does not come
out. The machine voter comes to the polls
regardless of weather. Politics is a part of
his Business and he attends to it. Compara-
tively speaking any political machine will
poll a heavier vote in bad weather than it
will when all conditions are pleasant Wood
had the machine with him and the weather
helped him. It was no wonder that he
grabbed about eventhing.
The victory of Wood however does not
mean much. Minnesota has not many votes
and it is a long time to the convention. The
really impressive feature of the primary’ is
not that Wood gained some votes but the
exceedingly poor showing made by Lowden.
To finish in last place in his native state is
bad enough but to be beaten by Hoover who
has not even declared himself a candidate
and who is a member of no party comes
not far from ignominious defeat.
oo
"AGAINST PUBLIC POLICY."
A New Jersey’ sugar company lias made
public through legal counsel its intention
to lease its assets to a Cuban corporation
as a means of escaping federal income and
excess-profits taxes. One of the stockhold-
ers of the company instituted suit to pre-
vent the proposed leasing of the property
although he himself according to his own
testimony would stand to gain $15000 a
year if the deal should go through. That
is if the stockholder won his suit he would
be a loser by that amount which he would
have to pay over to the government in the
form of taxes.
The stockholder testified that he was op-
posing the proposed deal with the Cuban
company because it was “a scheme against
public poliev.”
He is an exceptional man evei9 among
those who are given credit for •verage
honesty—and thereby lungs a doubt as to
the practical wisdom of the policy for which
he is fighting
“Public policy” is supposed to be that
which promotes the general welfare. If the
majority of individuals or corporations feel
moved to protect themselves financially as
is entirely natural why not consider the
question the other way ’round and pro-
nounce the burdensome tax a measure
“against public policy?” Certainly they con-
FRIDAY.
stitute a large part of the public and what
injures them injures everybody else —the
smallest consumer included.
The thing against which so many people
are trying to protect themselves and their
interests would be. in this light contrary to
public policy if that term be defined as
public welfare.
However it is certain that individuals
and corporations throughout the country
are going to take advantage of whatever
opportunities may be presented to retain for
themselves hs much as possible of their
earnings. The opposite cannot be assumed
without completely reversing factors that
have always been constant in human nature.
No normal person is delighted with the
idea of working for nothing. It approaches
too near to serfdom.
There is another prospective result of
the practice which the objecting stockhold-
er regards as "public policy. If the income
and excess-profits taxes are going to drive
many individuals and corporations out of
direct control of their own affairs the
prospects for material development of this
country’s resources by native residents
cannot be very’ bright. If such a change
would be against public policy what is to
be said about the cause of that change?
As a matter of demonstrated fact-“-even
though the country is just beginning to
feel the effects of the burdensome prohibi-
tive taxes—the best public policy now would
be to encourage production. The opposite
effect is being produced by the law which
penalizes success in commercial and in-
dustrial enterprises. The country as a whole
has far more to lose through a shortage of
production than it has to gain by the
revenue which the government will derive
through burdensome taxation. Nor is there
anv certainty as the tendency is now shap-
ing itself that the government will secure
the revenue it expects to receive from this
source. If profits are intentionally' kept
below the surtax line through the limiting
of production the government will suffer
financially while the country is suffering
from an economic standpoint.
Is it "public policy” to bring about such a
condition ?
NO NEW THING IN ENGLAND.
Those prohibitionists who have set out to
make Great Britain dry seem to believe
along with the majority of other people that
they are bringing into England a movement
that is novel. Nothing could be further
from the truth. There were efforts made in
behalf of British prohibition nearly two
hundred years ago and they were strong
efforts at that. There was nothing weak
about any of them except that they failed
to achieve the result they set out to obtain.
In 1736. a bill was introduced in the
House of Commons taxing gin and bther
strong spirits at a prohibitive rate and for-
bidding their sale in quantities less than one
gallon. What is more the bill was passed
bv the House. The revenues from alcoholic
drinks at that time formed part of the
money that went to the king and the blow
was so heavy to His Majesty George 11
that it was found necessary to pass an ap-
'propriation bill giving him about $350000
a year to make up the hole that had been
cut in his private income.
For a time after the passage of this pro-
hibition act the consumption of alcoholic
drinks decreased but the illicit trade soon
grew to enormous volume. Those were the
days when the Dutch smugglers sailed the
seas in droves and the people of the coast
counties in England and Scotland openly
aided them. Mention of the conditions that
existed can be found in the novels of Sir
Walter Scott and the works of contemporary-
writers.
All through the United Kingdom drug-
gists sold gin under an infinite variety’ of
: names very much on the order of those
i that are in use in this country today. The
> gin that was the chief object of sale was
; colored in various ways and all of it was
: called “medicine.”
In one year after the passage of the pro-
i hibition act. the consumption of gin was
11 about 3.700000 gallons every year. Four-
: teen years later it had increased to 11000-
;000 gallons. The act had not produced the
results that were expected and the poor
classes had so much gin to drink that it
was believed by some people that they
would be destroyed as a class. Nothing of
■ 1 the kind occurred however and the Lon-
-1 don of today is far more sober than in
1 those days and less ardent spirits are con-
I sumed than before the outbreak of the
great war.
Originally the richer people of Great
Britain were the consumers of the liquors
i stronger in alcohol and the poorer people
drank beer. They consumed so much beer
that in the time of William and Mary one-
third of the land in England suitable for
cultivation was sown in barley for the mak-
ing of beer. The consumption of beer aver-
aged more than two barrels every year for
every man woman and child in the coun-
try. As the children could not drink and the
majority of the women a small quantity it
follows that there were some powerful
drinkers of beer to be found in England in!
those days.
In 1689 Fmgland went to war with
France from which country she had im-
ported a great quantity of spirits. As a
war measure an order was passed forbid-
ding the importation of I quors from France
Instantly the licensed distillation of strong
i liquor increased enormously in England.
The richer people consumed more liquor
than ever and gin became so common that
: the poor people could have it in almost un-
limited quantities. The saying was that “A
| man can get drunk for a penny and dead
drunk for two-pence.”
Later the law was repealed as it seemed
to fail in accomplishing the result sought
by its enactment. From that time until now
the Britisher has gradually grown more and
more sober and has consumed less and less
liquor.
BUYING “LUXURIES.”
Either the American people are bound to
have what they want when they want it. or
Congress erred grievously when it compiled
the list of objects upon which the “luxury
tax” should be levied. The people have spent
more money for those “luxuries” during
the last year than ever before. It there-
fore follows that the things are not luxuries
or that the people have so much money they
do not care what they do with it.
Within the last six months of last year
the people spent for things listed as luxuries
a total of $67212677. This was an average
of $11202112 per month. The tax became
effective on May Ist. 19x9. and during the
.first two months of its existence the people
spent a monthly average of $1974858. It
is evident that after they had become ac-
customed to the tax they simply stepped on
the “gas” and went out for what they
wanted or decided that the articles were
not luxuries but necessities and as such
they had to have them.
The tax is imposed on carpets costing
more than $5 per yard: socks costing more
than $1: traveling bags costing more than
$25: and other things of that kind. It is
estimated that the tax is about two and
one-half per cent of the value of the articles
purchased. Figuring on this basis the value
of the goods purchased which were subject
to the luxury tax was not far from $2500-
000000 which would be slightly less than
$25 for every man. woman and child in the
United States. That is a high per capita ex-
pense for “luxuries.”
As showing how expenditures of the peo-
ple leaped up as a whole during 1919 when
it was certain that the war was over the
following figures are interesting:
In 1919 the expenditures for automobiles
(and it must be remembered that this would
have been much larger if the cars could
have been placed on the market) were $l-
393.022737 compared with $959250734 in
1918. Comparing the two years the expendi-
tures for pianos sporting goods grapho-
phones etc. were $370570172 against
$108244198; jewelry $274562936 against
$121133298: medicinal preparations. $254-
525.364: perfumes cosmetics and things of
that kind $98.9424252.
Those are heavy increases and show that
either the American people must revise their
ideas of what constitute “luxuries” or the
government should reconsider its tax
schedule.
The statements of statisticians who claim
to know what they are talking about are to
the effect that the orgy of expenditure that
has been rampant throughout the country
for the last year is drawing to a close in I
the East. They claim however that in the
West and South people are traveling at the
same swift gait. The probability is that the
West and South never went so wild in the
spending of money as did the East. How-
ever any indication in any part of the
country toward a return toward economy
is to be welcomed.
OO
A round up of income tax dodgers is to
begin shortly it is announced. It’s getting so
that a man with money or booze is always
on the run.
oo
Senator Harding says he finds that the
South is opposed to both prohibition and
the peace treaty. The trouble is the South
like the remainder of the country didn’t
have a chance to vote on either question.
OO
San- Antonio revenue agents have been
sued for $50000 for entering an apartment
in search of liquor. We advise the revenue
agents to return to the time honored method
of pecking through the keyhole.
<>o
THE DB IL A ROOSHTER
How well ] remember lash* Fall at the rally
I marcbed in Hoe wid the workin’ min sure.
And felt jubt as proud a* a king at bebouhlinc
The fall of the rich and the rise of the jKH»r;
Sure that’s what they tould me was mint by the
victory.
An’ no wonder I was elated at that
A* I stepped -to the music just like an old soger
An’ wore a big rooshter on top o’ me bat.
I invied the bo*s wid his rirhea and comforts;
No ebare of the profits I'd git if agin
; I voted to ka|»e up the tariff that only
Protected the boM»e« ar.d burdened the min:
I I’m sure I’ll g«*t even now wid ye. me hon^j-.
I'll vote just as sure as my name it is Pat
For Grover and thin at th* ratification
I'll wear a big roosther on top o’ roc hat.
I doc* it bad luck to the day an’ tbe hour;
I’d like to recall that same wife if I could.
And owe again hear the ould shtame whistle
soundin’ 1
That called me to work wh^n the timer they
were good:
The home he kok* worried. the foreman is aour
The old mill's d*MTtw! and gloomy at that.
And all I have Irft for my Khare of the glory
Is the old batthcred roosbter J wore on me hat.
I mustered up courage to spake to the foreman
An’ a*k him how long we’d be idle. (You see
The mill had been closed for a fortnight an’
loafin’
। Wid «wt a cint cornin’ was tellto* on
I He Mays to m** “You an’ I v ill l>uth suffer
Me biznesr is crippled roe credit is flat.
But if yez git hungry yez know” he said slyly.
“Yez can ate the ould roofcther yez wore on yer
bat.’’
So there's the hull shtory. and none can deny it.
The truth must be told though the heavens
should fall.
We made a mistake in defeatin’ the party
That gave um proteHion <o«mJ money an’ all:
In four years from now yez may talk tiU yer
apewblesM.
An’ argify until yer gray as a rat.
But if that party is again triumphant
The devil a rooshter yeaHl see *n me hat ?
—Unidentified Exchange.
THE SAN ANTONIO LIGHT.
GONZALES MAY FIGHT
Former Friend of Carranza
Cast Out by Chief May
Cause Trouble.
Mexico City March 19.—Ambassador
Bonillas is expected to arrive Sunday.
Uis acceptation of his candidacy has
not been extensively heralded here al-
thcush known in high official circles the
idea undoubtedly being to launch it as
a surprise when Bonillas first speaks
in public upon his arrival here. Prepar-
ations are going on for his reception—all
of the administration employes have
been given new suits of clothes all of
the pulque vendors Lave been requisi-
tioned to appear in their Sunday best
and even the rich baeiendados who work
hundreds of peons in the cultivation of
the maguey anil manufacture of pulque
sotol and tequila and who sell »bcir prod-
ucts in Mexico City have been ordered
to bring in all of their peons for the
occasion. In fact the whole business of
the administration for the next week
will be the "playing of politics.”
Just what effect the acceptation of
Bonillas will have on the supporters of
l’ablo Gonzales may be judged by the
fact that they have sent broadcast
throughout Mexico caricatures ridicul-
ing and attacking Bonillas. Their first
sign of activity was when they ascer-
tained that Bonillas would accept and
l’ablo Gonzales no longer was likely to
be the administration favorite. It is
currently reported that l’ablo Gonzales
will throw all his strength and influ-
ence against the Carranza administra-
tion that his sole object now will be to
destroy Bonillas or Flor de Theas they
now call him which menus Flower of
Tea from a burlesque song in the comic
opera Kepnblica Lirica which was sup-
preaaed by order of President Carranza.
Mould “Strangle Democracy.”
As showing tbe feeling of the Gon-
zo les-Obregon combination against Bo-
nillas the following interview (the first
by Juan Sancho Azcona. a national sen-
ator and campaign manager for l’ablo
Gonzales) issued to the press today re-
ferriog to the personnel of the commit-
tee that went to tbe border to meet
Bonillas and tender him the nomination
is substantially as follows:
"I have never been blind in politics
neither am I uncompromising but it
does appear to me that certain parties
who were intimately associated with
the militant political polit^ of former
administrations ougli’ at this
time to abstain from ta? 'g'F l an ac '
five part in favor of the -sfndid»cy of
Bonillas. Of course they have a right
to vote but to lend their personalities
in furtherance of the farce of electing
Bonillas may have a very marked el-
ect on the miuds and hearts of all. true
Constitutionalists be they Pablistas
Carrancistas or Obregonistas. Tbe great-
est act Bonillas could render his coun-
try would be to refuse to permit the Use
of his name to strangle our inlant De-
mocracy. The imposition of Itamon Cor-
ral was disastrous; the imposition of
Pino Suarez by some of my closest
friends during Madero’s regime was an
admitted mistake and the imposition of
Bonillas in view of the two historical
references I have mentioned can only
bring serious thought on tbe part of all
Mexicans who love the fatherland.”
"Puppets." Says Hill.
Gen. Benjamin G. Hill the militant
Obregonista leader is quoted substan-
tially as follows;
"My opinion relative to tbe commis-
sion that will receive the Engineer Ig-
nacio Bonillas and especially as to Fed-
erico Montez Manuel Amaya Luis
Manuel Riojas and tbe governors—or
a majority of tbein. strictly speaking—-
who attended the conclave and who have
resigned theatrically their positions as
governors leaving an understudy in
charge of their provinces is that they
will never he anything more than pup-
pets who arc managed by the strings
in Carranza's hands. They owe no al-
'giume to Bonillas and will change
their minds and opinions at any time
fat Carranza may see fit. Bonillas
ought to know these men if lie studies
their political antecedents. They arc
the new cientifioos snd at this time I
will not mention their purpose but
tney undoubtedly believe that Bonillas
is the logical man to cover their sinis-
ter purposes."
will give some id< a as to the campaign
that will bo launched against Bonillas.
He will be charged with having the sup-
port of th? reactionary element ami as
tbe present army is all Constitutional
i»ts and either favors Gonzal“s or Ob-
regon it will indeed be a hard task for
Corranzn to weed out all the Obrogon-
istas and Gonzalistas. Just what prom-
i-es or attempts Carranza will make to
keep Pablo Gonzalos in lino is prob-
lematical but undoubtedly he has seen
the danger of Gonzales in throwing his
■opport to Obregon for l’ablo Gon-
zales has always heretofore counted sol-
idly on tbe support and friendship of
Carranza. They are both from Coahuila
and if Carranza and Gonzales have
truly come to the parting of the v.ays
Gonzalos will forget all past favors and
friendship and play his own gam" for
l’ablo Gonzalo and Carranza can't
object for Carranza threw Gonzales over
board.
Majestic Theater: Harriet Rempel
in "Tarrytown" six other vaudeville
acts and picture “Tbe Woman in Rooen
Thirteen.” starring Pauline Frederi -k.
Grand Opera House: Motion pic-
tures: Alice Brady in “The Fear
Market.”
Empire Theater: Motion pictures.
Marguerite Clark in "Widow by
Proxy."
Royal Theater: Pantagos vaudeville
and photoplay Dorothy Dalton in "The
Market of Souls.”
Princess Theater: Loew vaudeville
and photoplay. Irene Castle in "The
Amateur Wife.”
Palace Theater: Motion pictures
’•The Whip.”
■MN OF
BONILLAS 15-
CALLED FARCE
administration Candidate
Will Be Opposed by Three
Factions.
These opinions by th? two leading r.rn
f the Gonzales and Obr-g m factions
Where To Go.
BUENOS AIRES IS NO
MORE THE WIDE OPEN
TOWN OF OTHER DAYS
Gaiety Still Obtains Bat It
Is a More Decorous
Variety.
Ah^ociatrd Con*»PAHde»ee.
Buenos Aires.—Buenos Aires which
once hud the Reputation uf being a “wide
open’ city and “gayer than Paris” is
“not what it used to be” iu the opinion
of many travelers who were here befon?
the war and have returned recently.
The gayety is still here they say.
but it iu more decorous and meantime
the lid has been clamped u|M>n many re
sorts in which the worst sort of license
wa^ wont to flourish openly. Public
gambling places have beeu also banned
dissolute women have been driven otf
tbe streets and beginning thi> year the
police have begun the suppression of
houses of ill fame. The claim is made
that Buenos Aires is today e’eaner mor-
ally than ever before in its history
due to the “reform” regulation of a re-
cent city administration and continued
by tbe present one.
^he bity council a few days ago also
passed an ordinance imposing a tax of
20.000 ’pesos annually on cabarets
which expected to put some of the
lower ♦ss places out of business. La
Epoca. the government organ iu ap
proving the measure refers to the
Buenos Aires cabarets as “establish-
ments of corruption” and demands th^t
minors be prohibited from entering
them. What are termed “cabarets” in
Buenos Aires are merely dunce hans
with an orchestra and with one or two
exceptions are poorly furnished. Drinks
are served but there are none of the
entertainment features whicn made the
cabaret successful in tbe United States
Here and iu the restaurants both 31
which an* open all night is where most
of Buenos Aires • gaiety’’ centers.
Theaters and moving picture houses
do not close until 12 or 12^10 o’clock-
As late as 2 o’clock numerous restau-
rants and cafes are still filled with
men and feme women with orchestres
or electric pianos going full blast.
Streets in tbe “gay life” district ate
still brilliantly lighted taxicabs flit
about and the sidewalks have many
strollers. What is called “revelling”
in the restaurants is. however not in
evidence. The patrons sit am- listen to
the music »at or sip their wine or otner
drinks but as an American observer
put it “there are no high jinks.”
It is considered that a prohibition
movement in Argentina would find a
very strong sentiment to overcome.^ Re-
cent despatches from the Ujntod State*
telling of the intention of North Ameri-
can prohibitionists to invade South
America did not appear to cause mueh
concern liere where indulgence in some
sort of alcoholic liquor is almost uni-
versal. The newspapers ignored the des-
patches editorially. One entire prov-
ince Mendoza is devoted to the wine in-
dustry. and just as in the Latin coun-
tries of Europe tbe drinking of win?
seems to be regarded almost a« natural
as the drinking of water. There au
probably as many bars in Buenos Aires
in proportion tn population as there
were in New York in pre-prohibition
days. In these bars thirsty American'’
just arrived from the I'niteo States find .
familiar drinks. The Manhattan.”i
“Bronx” and “Clover Club” cocktails |
arn as well knnwa by- th* same names |
as in New York. The “Martini” how- j
ever is here called a “Sai. Martin”'
which is the name of oire of the patriots •
of Argentine history.
Hats for Women M. P.
AftMociated Preu* ( orrewpondmee.
Ixmdon.—“Hats for women members
of Parliament” have made their first
appearance the enterprise of a Regent
Street fashion store which has been
beseigrd by interested fjnininc shop
fiser 1 little hats &>u« labeled
are brimless and of the biretta univer-
sity cap and tricorne style. Black and
dark brown are the only colors used.
One coquettish model has a long silken
tassel dangling over tbe right ear.
When a Feller Needs a Friend
Indirect Control
By H. Addington Bnir».
i (Copyright 1929 by The Associated
I Newspapers.)
You are worried because your child
is not studious. You are worried be-
j cause he is headstrong and disobedient.
. Also you are worried because he is
thoughtless and given to acting on the
impulse of the moment.
You have tried pleading with him
and you have tried scolding equally to
little purpose. Punishment has only
bad tbe effect of making him sullen and
bitter. You confess that you are at
a loss to know what to <lp.
Why not try indirect rather than di-
rect control?
Take a leaf out of the book of a cer-
tain wise friend of mine whose little
boy was reported by his school teacher
as being bright enough in everything
except arithmetic. In arithmetic he
seemed to be hopelessly dull.
“But that” the boy's father expos-
tulated “is only because you have not
got him sufficiently interested in arith-
metic”
The father did not scold the boy Of
reproach him. He did not menace him
with dire threats as to what would hap-
pen if he did not study arithmetic more
diligently. In fact ho did not at first
say anything about arithmetic.
He simply bought a box of dominoes
nnd with his wife began to play games
in which addition subtraction multi-
plication and division were essentials.
Their boy) watching them became in-
terested in the dominoes and begged to
be allowed to play also.
"That you cannot do” tbe father ex-
plained "because you do not know any-
thing about arithmetic. Nobody can
play these games who docs not know
arithmetic.”
It was not long afterward that the
teacher began to express surprise at
the nrogress this little boy was making
in his arithmetic.
“Natural and helpful control.” Pro-
fessor W. H. Burnham has pointed out
“G not by repression and direct inhibi-
tion. but rather by indirect control. (
"Repression means a short circuiting
of the nervous reaction and the diasi-|
pation of energy within the nervous sys-l
tom itself instead of normal expression
in co-ordinnted activity.”
"Control moans the utilization nf the
nervous energy in developing a new and
healthful form nf activity that niny take
the place of the unnholsesomo activity.
Every interest is potentially a means of
self-control.”
And everythin!’ that awakens and di-
reets interests aright is a prime aid to
indirect control. Personal example the
turning of work into play the tolling of
stories with not too obvious a moral—-
those are means of which enlightened
parents make persistent use.
They are moans of which all parents
should make norsistent use.
Pointed Paragraphs
Generally the head of the family foots
the bill.
A man seldom acts like a fool unless
he is the real thing.
An office holder who has a pull
doesn't generate mueh push.
If a man knows he is in the wrong
he can afford to got angry.
Advice which coincides with your
own opinion is easily swallowed.
A woman is always telling a man a
lot of disagreeable things—for bis own
good.
Some men never wander from their
own firesides —because they dwell in
steam-heated flats.
Only a fool goes around looking *or
trouble; the other fellow has more than
enough thrust upon him.
If a young man kisses a girl she doos
not want him t» tell it—but she is dis-
appointed if he doesn't repeat it.
Labor Selects Woman Candidate.
Aswoctated rres. Correspondence.
Northampton England.—Labor bas
selected Miss Margaret Bondfield to
•ppooe Charles A. McCurdy. Liberal
member of Parliament from Northamp-
ton and parliamentary secretary of the
ministry of food in the next election.
Miss “Maggie.” as she is generally
called. Is reported to bo one of the most
capable women in the labor movement.
She is an able speaker nnd has helped
to organize the women’s co-operative
movement.
Copyrighted 1920 by The Tribune Assoc. (New York Tribune)
MARCH 19 1920.
A Laugh or Two
With a keen eye on dramatic effect
the ambitious candidate for tbe job o
M. P. faced bis audience.
f"'-' 1 “Like you m?
friends” he said
"I am a horny
"B ) banded son of toil
and here are th<
I tools I used.”
As he waved «
trowel and a ham
mer in the air hi
—— went on:
“Two years ago J
was a working bricklayer and. a*
though prosperity has smiled on me
I still treasure tbe implements which
brought me my bread and butter.”
Wild cheers greeted his statement
and the tools were handed round for
inspection.
“Brother workingmen can I rely on
your support?"
“You can that!” exclaimed a man
who was examining the tools with an
air of awe. “A chap wot can lay bricks
with a gardener's trowel must be extry
clever!”
He had been dining well but not too
wisely and as lie was staggering home-
ward a friend met him and suggested
that perhaps it
would be better if \*J
he were to sit quiet- /Ak JM
ly in a picture show^^Hh .
for a time. jaal
They accordingly
went in together ’
but in a little while I
the friend found A
the inebriated oner*^^ ||
sobbing quietly to^ ——Ji
himself although the picture then flick-
ering across the screen was certainly not
a pathetic one.
“What's the matter?” he hissed.
| “Why-can’t you sit quiet and look at
i the picture?”
| “ 'Sno good ol’ man” sobbed the
1 other “i've gone stone deaf. I ean't
hear a single word they are saying.”
The clergyman of a poor parish was
showing a rich lady round hoping to
touch her heart and so received a big
W check for his peo-
ple.
We are now
passing through
the poorest slums"
he said. “These
have little
to brighten their
lives.”
1 “I must do some-
thing for them."
sighed the lady adding to the chauf-
feur: "James drive fhe car slowly
Only a few days ago a returned sol-
dier went into a dentist’s office to get
a tooth extracted. IJc wore a D. 8.
end turn on the big lamps.”
medal but the
thought of having f.
u tooth pulled was vr'■
more than he could /q JAw'
stand and be de- \
mended gas. The V//
dentist waited in
a fevej- > m - I
patience for the E?
soldier to "go un-L_
’er” but the latter '
was nervous and insisted on keeping one
eye open even though he had taken
enough gas to float a balloon. Finally
the dentist cried: “Let yourself go.
(.’lose tiiat eye you idiot.” Some- aero
from the back blocks of dreamland th«'
patient murmured sleepily. "Can t. It’s
glass.”
Io Safeguard Crown Jewels.
AMoeiated Press C orrssnondenee.
Ixindon.—The authorities at the
Tower of London are taking atepa
to strengthen the protection of the
crown jewels that are kept there. Sir
George Tounghusband. their custodian
is planning to install new thief-perplex-
ing devices. The British regalia are
kept in a cage in tbe Wnkefield Tower
electrically connected with two guard-
rooms. Colonel Blood succeeded in
stealing the crown iu 1671.
By BRIGGS
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Diehl, Charles S. & Beach, Harrison L. The San Antonio Light (San Antonio, Tex.), Vol. 40, No. 60, Ed. 1 Friday, March 19, 1920, newspaper, March 19, 1920; San Antonio, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth1616885/m1/6/: accessed July 12, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; .