The San Antonio Light (San Antonio, Tex.), Vol. 40, No. 306, Ed. 1 Saturday, November 20, 1920 Page: 4 of 10
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4
THE SAN ANTONIO LIGHT.
<F**»B»d J*nu*rr JK un.)
Cmm prWnt T»* •** Alt*e* Ulfkl th* *•" AatMli
Oaant*.
KMNMaa Low* Mir* n*r R*port ar A**»ct*<*« Ri*»
Inter d M nanora-HM* mattar at th* Poatorrie* at San
iMH'. T**-. uaSat taa Aai'nf Caasraaa Mare* 1. ll»?
Ba«ietr*a» eeaa artleale da eixunda clear ea la Ad-
■Huatraeiea de Cerraoe an Noero l«r*de. Tam. can
faeha II da Junta de USA
FoMieatloa Office: No* Tra.te Street
between Aim* C and U
M BM miTKIN KATUN.
1 Ma. • Maa. 1 Tr.
Otte carrier dally and Bunday M P.M P.W
City Carrier. Sunday ealy St*
<»n Tew) and •unday. .M
Mall <» Tesaal Sunday only •••“
Mail autaide Teana Includins Mexico .T» A»« SOO
Mall autaide Taaae (Sunday only) XW
It >a intportanu when dealt in tM addreae of your
—— •*•*«•*. to hot* *l« and new addraaaea
Bnould deheery bo trrasulnr. piraae notify th* office.
Telepbone Crockett ITOS. ■
Tbo San Antonio U»ht la on eale at hot ala and newa-
atand* tatousbout the Catted Stale*.
MKW SOUK OFFICE —Paul Block. Ine.. »S Madlaon
‘ThTcaGO OFFICE—PauI Bloclc. Inc.. Century Bldg.
BOSTON OFFICE —Paul Bl«k. Inc.. Utile Bldg.
DETROIT OFFICE—PauI Block. Ine.. krHtl Bldg.
BUFFALO OFFICE—PauI Block. Inc. l^wla Bldg.
MKMBKK <>F THE ASSOCIATED FBES*
The Aanucieted I’reeo la exclueteely entitled to tbo
ma for lepublieaUon of all new. dw<«M credited to
It er bol atberwiao credited in tote paper and alee the
local aewe publwbcd herein. All right of tepubUca-
turn of apeclal diapatcnaa herein are alao reoerred.
ONLY THE LIGHT EXCEPTED.
At the Friday meeting of the Kiwanis
club Dr. W. B. Russ one of the leading
physicians of this part of the country
denounced the quack doctor as “The low-
est of all crooks and sneaks.”
He further declared that the news-
paper that accepts and prints the adver-
tisements of "The lowest of all crooks
and sneaks ” is “just as low” as are the
"crooks and sneaks.”
The San Antonio Light is the only
newspaper in San Antonio which does
not print the advertisements of quack
doctors and is consequently the only
newspaper in San Antonio to which the
words of Dr. Russ cannot be made to
apply.
oo
"MONKEYING" WITH DESTINY.
There are many people who for rea-
sons that do them no discredit will al-
ways scout the theory that man descend-
ed. or rather ascended from the monkey.
But whatever our primitive ancestors may
have looked like few of us would be likely
to deny in the face of events passing
before our eyes that a monkey has played
in modern human affairs a part that may
prove to be scarcely les* far-reaching and
more immediate discernible than any
congenital influence that evolutionists
may’ ascribe to his kind.
A monkey bit a king. As inappropriate
and illogical as it may seem to expon-
ents of democracy it was the king that
died. Press dispatches reporting the inci-
dent omitted to say what became of the
monkey. Presumably he was dispatched
forthwith rather than left to give the
democratic philosophy of the fitness of
things another chance of vindication or
to see what would happen if the direction
of the attack should be reversed.
All levity aside however it requires
little imagination to see how this incident
may affect the future of at least one
nation apd not improbably the future of
the world. In fact the effects have al-
ready’ begun to manifest themselves in
Greece the scene of the tragedy and any-
o»e with half an eye can see that even
the first of those effects were not limited
to the monkey's victim.
The change encompasses the entire
Grecian government including basic prin-
ciples of governance as well as the con-
crete tangible machinery of government.
It involves the question of sovereignty
and in a broader wayithan the people of
Greece had ever experienced. Not only
does it have a direct immediate bearing
upon Grecian affairs but it may cast an
influence over the future affairs of all
Europe to say nothing of the new factors
which it may’ bring into the international
situation as it will bear upon the future
of.the United States.
The death of King Alexander was fol-
lowed almost immediately by an election.
Premier Venizelos the man who turned
Greece from the royal leaning toward
the central empires of Europe and made
her an aid to the entente allies was over-
thrown and through the expression of
the popular will King Constantine who
stood for what Venizelos opposed has
been afforded an opportunity to resume
the throne.
The entente allies have no little at stake
in the new situation in Greece and in
its international aspects that situation
might easily become extremely complex
if it is not so already. For Venizelos
had a hand albeit his participation was
not always visible in the shaping of the
affairs with which the peace conference
undertook to deal. As press dispatches
have reminded us. there seemed to be
an exceptionally close understanding be-
tween him and President Wilson regard-
ing the latter's "new-order” philosophy.
The dispatches also point out that of
all the principal figures in the negotiations
for the settlement of the questions created
by the war. Premier Lloyd George alone
retain* power. The Orlando ministry in
Italy has been overthrown. Premier
Clemenceau of France who aspired to be-
come president of that republic after he
had directed it* war enterprise and par-
•Htfpated conspicuously in the framing of
thf Versailles treaty has been retired to I
I
SATURDAY.
private life. And President Wilson the
inspiring genius of the league idea was
not upheld in the recent “solemn refer-
endum.”
Exactly how the change in Greece will
affect the world situation it is of course
impossible to foresee. But that it has al-
ready introduced a new factor is quite
manifest.
When one considers that this change
was precipitated by a monkey one cannot
but contemplate the strangeness of human
affairs. There are more ways than one
to “monkey” with destiny.
FOOLING WITH FIRE.
It is announced that Mrs. MacSwiney
widow of ftie late mayor of Cork has
obtained a passport to come to the United
States to testify at a hearing on the
“Irish question” which is to be held at
Washington by the “Commission of 100.”
In the light of the treatment accorded
Archbishop Mannix of Australia who was
prevented from returning to Ireland his
own home one may be surprised at the
exception which the British government
seems to be making in Mrs. MacSwiney's
case to what had begun to look like
a fixed policy. The British government
must know that any testimony which
she might offer at any hearing would be
calculated to aggravate rather than allay
the troubles with which it is coping in
Ireland.
But the question of possible leniency
on the part of the British government
in this particular case should not affect
the situation from the American stand-
point. At least it should not be regarded
as a license to us to obtrude any senti-
ments which any of us as individuals
may have concerning the Irish issue. For
us it should not be an issue.
But it is greatly to be feared that the
object of the prospective hearing at Wash-
ington is to create or at least to crystal-
lize. sentiment in this country in favor
of the Irish revolutionists. While the
commission that will conduct the hearing
has no official standing whatever. Euro-
peans who do not understand American
processes anyway are almost sure to
interpret the findings of this unofficial
body as the mature and deliberate judg-
ment of the United States as a nation.
And can there be much doubt as to the
nature of those findings when the leading
spirits in the inquiry were actuated by
avowed sympathy for the Irish revolu-
tionists? Many if not all of the mem-
bers of the commission have already sat
in judgment upon the “Irish question.”
Some of them have professed to believe
with Governor Cox that the United
States government ought to join the
League of Nations partly for the purpose
of obtaining justice for the Irish through
that institutional means. Others have
gone further than that insisting that our
government should recognize the “Irish
republic.”
It is only logical to anticipate there-
fore that the findings of the commission
will be used for propaganda purposes
and to bring influences to bear upon our
Congress in behalf of the Irish. Whether
propaganda of this kind should be un-
lawful may be a debatable question. That
it would tend to provoke trouble between
the L nited States and Great Britain is
not only highly probable but almost cer-
tain. \\ hether both or either of the two
countries would overcome the tendency
is another matter.
It wouM seem reasonable however
that the government of any nation how-
ever democratic it might be would be
fully within its rights m forbidding any
of its citizens either individually or in
formal groups to do anything which in
the nature of things might provoke war
with another nation—unless of course
the thing to be done were actually in
defense of the recognized rights of those
citizens in which case the government
would be a sorry one if it did not back
them up. But the rights of Americans
are not involved in the "Irish question.”
If that question is not one into which
the United States government may prop-
erly go is it one of which a group of
citizens may properly make an issue not
only for themselves and their fellow citi-
zens but for the government itself?
POINCARE ON THE LEAGUE.
Ex-President Poincare of France Jias
expressed the conviction in an article
recently published in a Paris newspaper
that the covenant of the league of Na-
tions must be amended so as to bring
about its acceptance by the United States.
He is professedly and no doubt actually
interested only in the practical side of
the matter for*he seems to adopt an
almost apologetic attitude for whatever
of idealism the entire league idea may
contain. To put it baldly he wants the
United States to join the league as a
means of facilitating the process of en-
forcing the treaty against Germany.
That not only France but the other
allies as well had secretly cherished this
desire from the outset must long have
been rather obvious if not openly mani-
fest. It was not to bring about a “new
I order" and minimize the chances of war
| that the allies fell in so enthusiastically
at first with President Wilson's plans as
represented by his “fourteen points.’’ They
saw an opfx>rtunity to get the substance
| in exchange for the shadow. But it was
only after the Paris peace conference that
the American people began to see clearly
what our European friends were up to.
As The Light has often remarked and
as it still believes all would probably’
have gone well with the League of Na-
tions if the European allies had suited
their actions to their fine applause of Mr.
Wilson’s principles. Undoubtedly one of
the greatest and certainly the most tan-
gible of the factors which caused the
American people to reject the original
league covenant in the recent "solemn
referendum” was the post-conference rec-
ord of the allies —particularly France.
So now in effect former President
Poincare is undertaking to make an asset
out of a thing which from the American
• viewpoint is one of the greatest liability
1 items in the entire league question.
France M. Poincare strongly implies—-
and this is no revelation—cares nothing
for the attainment of the high ideals
which were originally presented as the
soul and justification of the treaty or
at least cares far less about this enter-
prise than about the little matter of col-
lecting from Germany the debt which the
peace conferees assessed against her. Can
। any one after taking cognizance of this
attitude believe that France ever did put
her heart and soul into the project of
protecting the future against wars?
But France among other European
nations had made great professions of in-
terest on that basis; and now if M. Poin-
care’s view is the view of his country
the American people’s rejection of the
league covenant is doubly vindicated. Ap-
parently the former French president
thinking that the outcome.of the recent
election signified a repudiation of Presi-
dent Wilson’s ideals and expressed a de-
sire to adopt only the practical is am-
bitious to give France an advantage. But
Americans know that it was not the
President’s ideals as originally enunci-
ated. that they repudiated but the pro-
posal. in the form of a concrete pact to
destroy not only those ideals but our
national sovereignty as well. And as for
our leaning toward practicality the
Frepchman has misapprehended that too.
The average American voter cares little
about the indemnity terms of the Ver-
sailles treaty. All that their country-
put into the war. and all that their Presi-
dent without authorization from them
proposed in the beginning to put into the
league was of an altruistic nature —and
both the actual and proposed contribu-
tions have been treated with but scant
respect by the Europeans. Yet now they
want us to come into the league to help
them carry on with the materialistic proj-
ects whose quick appearance after the
peace conference turned so many of us
against the proposition of having Amer-
ica participate in the league.
The present administration may- have
tried to get the United States into the
frying pan. but if the next administration
should concur in what appears to be M.
Poincare's conception of our duty it would
be like jumping into the fire. To par-
ticipate in a league whose principal func-
tion it was to minimize the chances of
war would have been bad enough under
the terms proposed. To participate in a
league whose sole function was to under-
write the exploitative projects of the
allies would be lyithinkable
Out of twelve men sentenced to be
hanged by Chicago courts all but two
escaped the gallows. Couldn't they hire
law vers?
Advice of Canadian brewers whose se-
curities fell upon learning the result of the
recent election in the States: Be not un-
duly alarmed.
A lot of men who started in to wear
overalls to bring down the high cost of
living are still wearing silk shirts to keep
up appearances.
THE FIELD OF GLORY.
_ •
War «hook th* land where Leri dwelt
And fired the di*mal wrath be felt.
That Meh a doom wax ever wrought
Aa hi* tn toil while nther* fought;
To toil to drram—and ’till tn dream.
With one day barren a« another;
Tn consummate a« it would wem
The dry deapair of bia old mother.
Fer off one afternoon began
The aound of man destroying man;
And Levi. nick with namelena rage
Condemned again bin heritage.
And ’igbed for warn that might have rome.
And would if onee he mold bare sundered
Thone har«h. inhering rlaime of home
That held him while he cursed and wondered.
Another day. and then there came.
Hough bloody ribald hungry lamy.
But yet theoinelre*. to Jxvi'* door.
Two remnant* of the day before.
They laughed at him and what he sought
They jeered him. and hi» painful acre;
But Levi knew that they had fought.
Awl left their manners to their Maker.
That night for the grim widow** ears.
With hof*et that hid themaelven in fears.
H* told of anna. and fowtly deeds.
Whereat one l*apn the while he read*
Ami *aid he’d he no more a clown.
While other- drew the breath of little—
The mother looked him up and down.
And laughed—a *aut laugh with a rattle
She told him what she found to tell
And Levi listened and heard well
Rome admonitions of a voice
That left him no cause to rejoice—-
fie sought a friend and found the Mar*.
And prayed aloud that they *hould aid him
But they «aid not a word of war*.
Or of a reason why (Sod made him.
And who's of this or that estate
We do Dot wholly calculate.
When baffling shades that shift and f ling
Are not without tl iiw glimmering;
When even Jxvi. fir* of faith.
Behoved of none forgot by many
I>mmiseed as an inferior wraith
Reborn may be as great a* any.
—Edwin Arlington Hobin^m.
THE SAN ANTONIO LIGHT
“It certainly docs" Fanny breathed.
“A thousand dollar*!” she repeated.
Kbc looked around the room. There
was no end of the thins she could
buy with that >lOOO. Suddenly she bc-
jeame aware-that her visitor was watch-
ing her curiously.
"I suppose you’re (.injuring up alt
aorta of ways of using it" Hannuh
Hitchcock said. "Seem* like you’ve
got about everything you need right
now. I'd thought of getting me a new
bonnet. Hut what's the use? 'Twill
«oon be spring and then I've got to
have one Anyway. I guess Cll hang to
this one. and put my money out at in-
teret. It will make me a nice littic
nest egg!"
Hannnh sat by the fire for an hour
longer warming herself and talking over
the legacy. She know all about Cora
Miles whom Fanny iiad never seen. It
seemed wonderful. Fanny thought that
an absolute stranger should just for
the sake of some little tie of bkod leave
her >lOOO. Her mind fl*w on making
plana calculations while old Hannah
talked. She. too was held to Fannv
by n thin link of relationship although
Fanny had never countonanwi it mor*
than she had to. Now out of gratitude
to Hannah for bringing such w wj. she
made her a eup of tea and brought
her a plate of sandwiches and cake.
The eld woman finally departed.
"Poor old thing." Fanny said to her-
self. "I don't believe that she is as
miserly as people say. 1 believe sb •
needs that >lOOO even more than 1
do."
When Miles came homo to nipper
Fanny in a great state of excitement
told him the news. "Just think Miles
it's a little fortune!”
“I'm glad for you" said Miles who
was quiet and dark and sensible a
direct contrast to Fanny's volatile blond
vivacity. But kt me tell you what
I'd do with it if I were you. Funny ;
I'd put it our at interest. It will bring
you a nice bit of pin money.”
"Pin money!" cried Fanny. -Oil I
don't want pin money. I want tilings
around the house a floor lamp —”
"Yes. Mrs. Elting'* Cot one. and it
tips over every time they go near it.
You've got plenty good enough things.
Fanny till we get the house paid for.
When we do you may splurge a little.
Today’s Short Story
LEGACY THAT FAILED.
(Copyright 1020 by W. Werner.)
Fanny Keen was having one of her
happy (lays. Everything had gene
beautifully from the moment of her
rising with a laugh on her lips anil
a song in her heart until now at 2
o’clock in the afternoon she sat stitch
ing on a silk shirt she was making for
Miles. Fanny made all Miles' shirts
because he liked her to do so. and it
was more economical. On the salarr
he was drawing they had to economixa
if they would | ay for their littic lionln
and keep out of debt. Miles always
used to careful ways of living said they
were playing a game at which they wer-
sure to win and he enjoyed it. Fanny
however would have been glad of great-
er leeway in their finances. She want
ed so many things that she might have
to wait years for. Still today even
the longings and restrictions of life
did not seem to have power to disturb
her. and she sat happily sewing and
thinking that she must suatch an hour
from her work to read an interesting
book which Mrs. Elting had loaned her
It was cold and blustery without
। but within Fanny's curtains were very
sheer nud white the begonia dangled
a wealth of rosy bloom and the furnace
was doing nicely.
And then suddenly into her peace
was projected the figure of an old pe-
culiar wonu who seemed to arrive on
a rising gab* of wind. "Ain't this a day
and a half?" she wheeled as sho
straightened her old black bonnet and
opened her thick coat thereby releasing
an odor of bygone "Boiled victuals.'
“You must know that I think a hull
lot of you Fanny or 1 wouldn't be com-
ing clear over hero to see you todav.
But I says to myself Mcbbe she
hain't heard. and I orter »“ll her.’ ”
"Heard what. Mrs. Hitchcock?"
"Why that Cora XUtB h dggd 1
left every one of her relative.. SItXM
apiece. That mean you a* well a.
me. if you are only a cousin twice re-
moved.
“I. thia true?” Fanny demanded.
“True a. I’m sitting here iu this
chair. I got a letter today." Hln:
brought it out of her pocket and gave
it to Fanny to read. It was from the
lawyer who had drawn the will. "Now
don’t that nay what's what?"
Oh Man!
But 1 want to pay the bill myself. Ho
you put your money iu the. bank. A
thousand dollars” said Miles "is *
mighty nice thing to have by one in
case of need."
"I'm going to put it where I shall
never know I've got it" said Fanny.
"I'm going to use it to fix things up iu
the house aud get some new clothes aud
get you—”
Miles lifted a hand firmly. "Nothing
for me my dear. I've got all 1 need.
But 1 say Fanuy you show the in-
fluence of Eva Kiting all right. If
she doesn't (ton buying her floor tamps
and Chinese ruga pretty soou Tom will
have to shut up shop. Two men couldn't
earn enough to keep a woman like that.
And the woist of it ia thia—she arouses
envy in every woman »he comes in con-
tact with She's a vampire" exploded
Miles who bad been bottling up his dis-
approval if the gay Mr*. Elting a good
while.
Funny was scarlet. “Now see here.
Miles." she aaid in a deadly voice. “Eva
Elting is iiy friend and I won't hear
her abused eirn by my husband. I
suppose Tom had been complaining *o
you rbout her. 1 suppose you men get
together and rake us women over the
coals."
"Toni's a good fellow" replied Miks
rather flushed himself. "And os for
our talking over our women folks we
could maybe but we don't. What I
know about Eva 1 know straight but
uot from Tom. I've got eyes to see
with haven't 1? I've thought for a
good while chat you were getting that
woman on the brain aud now 1 know
you have. Of course you can use
you.* own money any way you ace fit
you cau burn it up in tho (tore or
you can buy a lot of gewgaws that
you haven't a bit of use for but I
maintain that what you ought to do
with it is tu put it out at interest"
"That sounds just like Hauuah
Hitchcock" said Fanny laughing {
acridly.
"Writ Hannahs got some sense even
though she Uie* overdo the saving busi-
ness" returned Miles.
"Au I 1 Luvrut?"
“You might Lave moie. I sometimes
think" finished Miles glaring at bis
pager.
Fanny washed her dishes while tears
dropped hiH the dish water. Now
she and. Miles had exchanged words
and they bad promised that they would
never quarrel.” He bad said things to
her that she could never forget. Well
if be felt that way toward her it was a
good thing perhaps that she was go-
ing to have some money of her own. At
least she could be independent. She
only wished that the >lOOO had been
>10000; then sh r need not a*g him for
another thing as long ns she lived. Eva
Elting had always said (he was too
meek a wife.
She was just finishing her work
when the door opened and Miles with
the evening paper in bis hand spoke to
her.
“I want to read something to you
Fanuy" he said. He had cooled down
and had his old pleasant look but
Fanny's heart did not soften. He be-
gan to read: “Woman leaves fortune to
cld ladies' home. Second will found
which cuts out large circle of rela-
tives. "
“Let me see that.” Fanny said.
Miles save her the paper and ah
read the parat^ph carefully. She
wanted to cry. bat sb<* would not.
“It serves me right” she said at
last.
Miks put his arms about her. “I'll
make if up to you dear. Don't you
care.”
HOMES HARD TO FIND
Scarrily of Anartm.-nt in Paris Brings
Divorced Couple Together.
Paris. Nov. 90—The great difficulty
of finding lodgings in Paris has been
the cause of manv unusual incidents re-
cently.
Divorced persons seeking saparate
apartment* *re having such difficulty
in finding them that. In one case at
least. they composed thHr temperment-
el difference* in order to keep their old
apartment.
A painter and bls wife who bad been
divorced by mutml agreement were
both lookin’ for apartment*. Frequent-
ly their path* crossed in their search
for quarters. Th” flr*t time they met
tl “- bowed gravely but politely. Tlrolr
mutual smile gradually broadened st
the hunt for flats narrowed down to a
few hovels In the slnm section.
“Let's ki*s and make up and go back
ito our flat" the wife finally said; aud
they did.
President Millerabd. who recently
took possession of the Llysee Palace re-
ceived 41 application* for hl* apart-
ment on the Avenue de Villar*.
Henry Lnndru. who ba* been in La
Hante prison for the past twenty
month* awaiting trial on charge grow-
ing out of the disappearance of eleven
women recently was di»tM>**c»scd from
the flat that he had occupied on the
Boulevard Roebechonart a rather sor-
did section of Paris. Request* came
from every quarter In Paris. Rome even
from aristocratic Auteuil asking that
the flat he reserved
A tagrant just finishing 30 days in
Ln Sante prison told his cell-mate un-
der rentenee of five year* for swindling
that he derailed to return Into cold
dreary Paris. He was homeless and
prospects of spending the winter nights
under Paris bridges did not appeal to
him. The prisoners exchanged doth-
ing nnd card* of identity and when the
warder called for the vagrant to send
him out into the cold world the swin-
dler responded. The fraud wax discov-
ered only when the swindler's lawyer
called at the jail
HOTEL MEN LEARN HOW
EUis Island Meals at Seventeen Cents
Are a Revelation.
New York Nov. 20.—Delegates to
the convention of the National Hotel
Association here couldn’t believe that
only fifteen minutes from the tip of
Manhattan tempting meals are served
for exactly 17 cents each. So Fred-
erick A. Wallis immigration commis-
sioner on Ellis Island invited doubter*
on a tour of culinary inspection just
tn show how they du it on Uncle Sam's
doorstep.
A number of the hotel men. who say
they nrc intent on bringing down the
cost of tavern fan* accepted the com
mlssioner’s invitation with the idea of
infusing some of the Ellis Island meth-
od into the conduct of their own kitch-
ca».
"For particulars." said the commis-
sioner "see MacGowan."
The secret of reducing the snatHne**
of provender as it a'lncars ■ teaming
ind succulent on the dinner table. i« a
mystery but MacGowan. D. T. Mac-
Gowan caterer on the island is on the
inside. His explanation runs: "Pur
chases on a lowest bid basis quantity
production and profit* never nan thau
1-OiJ per cent on the monthly invest
ment; result 17-ccnt dinner*."
And when someone interpos’d that
MacGowan “couldn't servo a 'regular*
meal for 17 cents" I e exhibited a* a
sample menu the following:
Brcakfait: Rico with milk stewed
prune* bread and butter and coffee
with two lumps of sugar to the cup.
Dinner: English beef roup with bar-
ley Irish stew with vegetable* tapi-
oca pudding and coffee.
Supper: Lamb hash green popper*
bread and butter blackberry jelly cot
fee and teo.
Oaf of f/ie Moaihs of Babes
Little Arthur—What did you get on
your birthday?
Little Edward—Why I got horned
of course.
Mta aged 5 was visiting in the
country and. seeing a potato bug for
the first time sin* aswed: “Mamina
docs flic* play tennis?”
“No dear.” replied the mother. “Why
do you a»k?"
"Bcean«c." answered the little nils*
“I just saw one with a sweater on."
Little -i year-old Edwin while out
walkin’ with his nuriM*. bap;iened to
a blacksmith shop just a* the smith
was shoeing a liorae. On reaching home
he astonish*d his mother by aaylog:
“Oh mamma I found the place where
they make horse*. I saw a man nailin'
on the feet."
Where to Go
Majest'c: “Moonlight." a play with
mu nnd six acts of Bis Time vaude-
vil'«.
Empire: Picture*. “The Penalty"
Gouverneur Morris' story. Also a com-
edy.
Grand: railage*' vaudeville nnd
pl* nre» N"en| Hart In “I'd'** O
Roval: Picture*. Dorotbv Daitou in
“A Komantie Adventun**.”
Princess: I.oew's vaudeville: “The
Izive Tangle.” a fan* and four other
act*. Pict a res.
NOVEMBER 20 1920.
A Laugh or Two
A profiteer bought a wonderful
- country house aud set about making
( it even more wonderful according to
r —T** h** own ideas. One
Cj" "t hi" (Uggeation*
i /\ S wa “ ■ fi "l' pond
1 uGM 'll Uy which should coo-
tain eel*.
* " sut vou can't
P k '“l!.. M ' l “ in ii
1 if/ 4 |Miinl. objected the
t . ' neighbor to whom
4jt> ' he had confided
। *" "■ thi* idea. - "They
. have to go down to the sea every year
you know.”
' "Well I won’t have 'em” gasped
1 the profiteer: “I always takes the
‘ minus • and kids every year but 1
( ain't going to take no eels.”
There had been a difference of opin-
। ion in the preacher's family in which
six-year-old Mary thought she got th*
worst of it. - .
So at prayer timi Ael
she was unhappy T jJkjWl
aud resentful to-
ward the world iu
general and her > jßMmi
own ministerial
family iu particu- “A
lar ' * . . "S'-**
But she knelt at
her mother's knee. ■ । ■ —
as usual nnd went through her or-
dinary evening petition*. Finally «he
added:
”Oli. Ixird make all the bad people
good!"
She paused for a moment then as
an afterthought concluded:
"And. if you can please make all
the good people nice!"
“Why my dear”* said Mr. De Style
“I'm glad to see you so composed.
When I left this morning you were
weeping and wail-
/y ing and tearing
Oi/'a '' s ? onr '" > r heeguae
* Fido wm »lck."
“Well you see
explained Mr*. De
X? '■■'b-A XK/ Style "after you
W le ^ ^ r ** Tiptoe
49 / came and told me
-^7b~ ~v that dogs of Fido's
■ 1 breed were going
out of fashion. So 1 dried my tears
and kicked him out."
“There is one tiling I fear you have
forgotten.’ said a *-* i-ui
young man to an-
other who evident-
ly had been vinlnt--C
in-: the Volstead
net.
"Whasbt that?” M fT'j/
said the other. SfIHS
feeling the lamp- 1 V r-j-uOT
post.
"The way home!" ■ ■
was the quick reply.
“Dobbs says art is no longer appro-
etated. He paiuosi
( tJASK- ; n picture called
“'' j" "Greedy Fellow.”
' showing a pig eut-
ing corn aud —“
"Why. he *.hl
« 4h?v<* ~iat picture I'm
’ vf* «ure."
"Yes but li* bo*
7°"* •'e ar l •i a f * ke
c*^ model sold for
mor* tian the painting.”
Pointed Paragraphs
Money b either a man’* blavc or his
master.
A inan neually puta bh bext foot for» ।
want but uot a ith a mule.
Inter * won ’ '•* ■ the r<»le
of dbintrrertodnrm for a purpone.
Pnrofraphically niw okina it tale* the
blur pencil to make a long xtory abort.
When it cornea to appreciate y<- «r
jokra the man who laugh* first laugh* I
bent. I
I
। inrtahip. and aft< • marrtafe her bu»- I
bn nd does tin she plcanc*. I
Th* man who make* trouble between I
two women get* more enjoyment out it I
than they do. I
Jt is better to make g<wid not of what |
great d*al that 1* of no earthly war. I
\ I
wear a nmallcr bat than he ronld at 20. I
Of roiirM’ he can; with baMnena the I
y< utliful HWclling of the head goes down. I
master.
—By Briggs
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Diehl, Charles S. & Beach, Harrison L. The San Antonio Light (San Antonio, Tex.), Vol. 40, No. 306, Ed. 1 Saturday, November 20, 1920, newspaper, November 20, 1920; San Antonio, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth1617127/m1/4/?rotate=270: accessed July 1, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; .