The Allen American (Allen, Tex.), Vol. 26, No. 37, Ed. 1 Wednesday, December 13, 1995 Page: 3 of 44
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Wednesday, December 13,1995 — The Allen American — Page 3A
Health
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Holiday blues a common
By GEORGE D. WILBANKS ----------------------------------------
Temporary blues during the Feelings of depression
holidays are not uncommon, but could be triggered bv the
more serious symptoms might 1,
signify clinical depression, which reminders of loss that
affects nearly 11 million Amer- many experience during
icans each year. this time. Not living up
Its a myth that clinical de- to ideals set by society
pression occurs more frequently hash L1 1
) during the holiday season, but and not being able to
that’s small comfort to those purchase gifts can aggra-
whose suffering stands in stark vate depression,
contrast to the gaiety of the sea-
son. Feelings of depression could
be triggered by the reminders of Clinical depression is a highly
loss that many experience during treatable mental illness, yet many
this time. Not living up to ideals people are reluctant to seek help,
set by society and not being able It is a medical disorder just like
to purchase gifts can aggravate diabetes, high blood pressure or
depression. heart disease, which can be tre-
Women are estimated to be ated. Some of the major symp-
1 twice as likely to be depressed as toms of depression include loss of
men because of different biologic- interest in things you used to en-
al responses to stress, as well as joy; feeling slowed down or rest-
different types of social stresses. less and unable to sit still; feeling
Women tend to be more prone worthless or guilty; an increase
to Seasonal Affective Disorder, or decrease in appetite; thoughts
or SAD, a depressive syndrome of death or suicide. Physical or
that is probably triggered by indi- psychological symptoms that can
vidual sensitivity to varying accompany depression include
amounts of daylight. SAD typical- headaches, sexual problems,
ly strikes in the winter — with as digestive problems, or being an-
many as 10 percent of those living xious and worried.
in the north affected — and lifts If you have symptoms of de-
when the season changes. pression, seek help. Contact
syndrome
your doctor, who can check to
see if there is a physical cause for
your depression, or refer you to a
mental health specialist for furth-
er evaluation and treatment. You
should never try to self-medicate
your depression by using seda-
tives, alcohol or stimulants to
make yourself feel better. These
efforts will only help to mask the
real problem and might make it
worse.
It might seem like you are the
only one feeling this way but, in
truth, you are not alone. The holi-
days can be stressful to many
people. Help is available. Talk to
your doctor.
Free copies of “Depression”
are available by sending a
stamped, self-addressed, busi-
ness-size envelope along with the
name of the booklet to: The
American College of Obstetri-
cians and Gynecologists, Re-
source Center, AP106, 409 12th
St. SW, Washington, D.C.
20024.
Next Week: When You Are
Expecting Twins.
George D. Wilbanks, M.D., is presi-
dent of The American College of Ob-
stetricians and Gynecologists.
Practice good communication skills
Monica stormed angrily out of the
room. “It’s always the same story.
Gary just does not listen to me. If
we can’t even understand each other
how can we hope to stay married.
Sometimes I feel like just giving up.”
Communication is the hardest and
the most vital part of any rela-
tionship. When the lines of com-
munication fail, the relationship will
often follow. What steps can you
take to ensure better communica-
tion in your relationship? Here are a
few suggestions.
Use “I” statements.
Most conversations turn into
arguments when they begin with the
words, “You should have...” Telling
your spouse what he or she should
have done or should have felt will
almost always lead to an argument.
Instead, try speaking about how you
feel.
JASON D.
CARTER
Even if you are listening, if the per-
son cannot tell you are listening it
will not matter! (Try that for a con-
voluted sentence.)
Try facing the person and estab-
lishing eye contact. Nod your head
as you listen and even repeat certain
phrases to show that you are follow-
ing his or her train of thought. If you
don’t understand what someone is
saying, ask. Not only will you under-
stand the conversation more accur-
ately, but the other person will feel
more understood.
“I felt bad when you left in the Don’t discuss important issues
middle of the party” sounds less while angry.
threatening than, “You made me feel When you enter a conversation
bad when you left.” You own your angry, you will usually leave it the
feelings. Telling someone that they same way. If you are too angry to
made you feel a certain way will discuss the issue calmly and rational-
automatically put them on the defen- ly, then wait and discuss it later. Be
sive. sure to discuss it, though:
Listen actively. When the heat of the moment has
Nothing feels worse than spilling Passed, the solutions usually come
out your emotions to someone who more easily. Maybe it was not a dis-
does not appear to be listening, agreement at all but simply a mis-
understanding. You will never know
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unless you discuss it in a rational
manner.
Communication is a life skill that is
essential in all relationships.
Good communication skills take
practice. It does not happen all at
once, but with a little effort it can
improve. Take it one step at a time
and remember to treat your spouse
with the respect and compassion
that your relationship deserves.
Jason Carter, M.S., is a therapist with
Texas Christian Counseling Centers of
Plano.
Give the gift of Peace
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Watterson, Tim. The Allen American (Allen, Tex.), Vol. 26, No. 37, Ed. 1 Wednesday, December 13, 1995, newspaper, December 13, 1995; Allen, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth1688478/m1/3/: accessed July 17, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Allen Public Library.