The Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 30, No. 4, Ed. 1 Saturday, April 1, 1944 Page: 2 of 4
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We of the Staff don't know that it is considered a tradition
or not at the Institute to publish an "April Fool" issue of the
Thresher but have endeavored to put out just such an issue.
Some persons, no doubt, will look upon this issue as a waste
of materials, time and money. They may also call it a foolish
jesture but this was not the idea behind the paper. During these
times of war when everyone has in one way or another been
touched by its gravety, there should be some diversion from se-
rious thoughts and joy of living should be expressed. Thus we
of the Thresher staff desire in this small way to possibly aid in
building a higher morale. We. hope to replace some of the sad-
ness and seriousness with a small amount of happiness. It might
even be said that this is in a small way our way of doing our bit
for morale, for showing our men in the Navy, here at school,
just how much we appreciate them, will try to understand some
of the things they have been through in seeing action abroad
and will try to make their stay here a pleasant one.
It is the staff's sincerest wish that everyone, faculty mem-
bers included, will enjoy to the fullest this issue of the Thresh-
er. It is also hoped that they will take the stories in which their
names appear, in the spirit of*fun in which it was written. If
such is not the case then we consider our purpose half defeated.
We have all more or less "let our hair down," if we might be
permitted to use such a phrase, in this issue and have tried to
make it one that would be highly amusing to all who read it.
The circumstance or situation which was beyond our con-
trol was the fact that April 1 came on Saturday this year and
not on Thursday as would have been most convenient. The pa-
per will appear from now on at the usual time, on Thursday.
By Meet-'er An'—Pray
The engagement
of Mn Oberle a d 15-year-old
Maisie McGinty was announced last
night at a free-for-all at the fash-
ionable Castle Inn. All who attend-
ed—invitations were given out only
through the various speak-easies of
the city—say they enjoyed them-
selves thoroughly, only they cannot
remfember exactly what happened.
The wedding has been calendared
for next Tuesday night, as Mr.
Oberle states that he has some bus-
iness to attend to.
Next Thursday
night the Navy boys will enter-
tain with an open house. Invitations
have been posted to every eligible
female in the school. Miss Dean will
be the guest of honor. Refreshments
will be liquid and all present- can
be assured to be in a state of high
inconsistency.
The JEZLS
entertained with a beer party for
members and dates last Sunday in
Memorial Park. Food was furnished
by the boys.
JUNKED BUILDING—
(Continued from page 1)
return it (paper, not olfactory
sense) as wallpaper. The typewrit-
ers, file cases, and other such use-
less scrap iron will be traded in on
the new spittoons. All cement and
stone will be cut into suitable blocks
and sold to Texas University to be
used in the math courses there. The
foundation and basement of the old
building is to be converted into a
modern swimming pool. A small
fee will be charged, it will be open
every day, and the water will be
changed, once a month. It is be-
lieved that this will be the best pay-
ing investment of the Institute.
THE THRESHER
Entered as second class matter,
October 17, 1916, at the post office
in Houston, Texas, under the act of
March 3, 1879. Subscription price:
by mail, one year 75 cent3 payable
in war stamps.
Editor ~ Bobby Sakol
Business Manager .... Jane Sinclair
The ILLS
entertained their senior members
at, the Ranch Club, where one of
the members is now featured. A
good time was had by all, except
the boys complained that there were
too many posts.
The HOWLS
had a theater party at the Palace
—need we say more?
0
NO MORE FINALS—
(Continued from page 1)
calisthenics are being added to the
Navy schedule each day, and un-
less the four weeks usually allotted
to Final exams are eliminated, the
Navy boys will be requii'ed to rise
each morning at four A.M. instead
of at six o'clock as usual.
3) The third argument for the
abolition of examinations- was ex-
pounded by Dr. Wilson of the Phys-
ics Department, and seconded by
Miss Sarah Lane, the Dean of
Women. Dr. Wilson is quoted as
saying, "College Professors for too
many years have been hounded by
the dreadful chore of making out
tests for their students. We are re-
quired to know altogether too much
detailed work about our subject, and
it is time we did something about
it. Let us rebel once and for all."
Miss Lane applauded Dr. Wilson
wholeheartedly. "Without exams
there will be very little cutting of
classes for me to reigister in my lit-
tle black book. I am in favor of the
proposal."
Students! ARE we going to let
cur Faculty cheat us out of one of
the loveliest phases of our college
careers ? They must give us back
our Final Examinations!
Dr. Weiser Resigns
So Chern 100 Class
Sleeps Undisturbed
•Dr. Weiser, professor of chem-
istry, and Dean of the Institute,
handed in his resignation from the
faculty today. Dean Weiser, when
interviewed, stated that the great
number of bojfc sleeping in chemis-
try 100 has finally brought about
(Continued on page 4)
W.1I, it seems that many inter
things have been ^aldnf
among the Institute person-
ages this past week
everywhere to gether are Ken Smith
and Stella Sullivan, Jack
and Humpy Gordon, and Gill Wal-
ker with Beth Hummel. And Evelyn
Nicholson has finally admitted her
S. L.—none other than Diek Parker,
an ex-Owl. Pat Trammel was over-
heard declaring that if she saw
John Kivlen in 100 years it would
be too soon! Mrs. Carolyn Hohl seen
telling everyone that her marriage
is on the rocks. And Es just can't
stand the thought of Bob anymore.
It's been rumored that Ella and Gil
are fast breaking up because he's
too attractive to the other gals.
It surely is tough about Dottie
breaking her engagement with Bob-
by . . . and they were such a cute
couple . . . Speaking of engagements
Repass and Bob Tresh have kept
their's secret for a long time.
John Lee is such a quiet boy. Don't
let J. D. Goodrich tell you he has
an autographed picture of Ann
Martin. Too bad boys, it looks like
Loose is staying true to the boys
that left in March.
We heard Marion Holland say
that she didn't think that Jimmy
was so cute . . . and on the same
r.ight Madge said Mike wasn't pret-
ty at all. Why is it that the boys
from the fleet don't like to go out
with girls ... it seems like they
want to spend every Sat. night stu-
dying.
We just found out that the ma-
jority of Rice girls think that „ the
NROTC boys are much better look-
ing Athan the V-12. Ken Kridner has
lost all interest in Ann Landram
and so Marion Jones has taken over.
We don't think Pat West is cute at
all . . . in fact she talks too much.
Jimmy Berling doesn't like Betty
Simmons at all, he just goes around
with her to make Preston jealous.
The navy boys really hate to get
mail . . . They just hate to see the
expression on H. E. Hansen's face
when he receives his daily Spec.
Delivery from Florida.
Poor Bruce Bradbeer doesn't have
a girl to call his own while Johnny
Cox has to fight them off with a
stick. We wish Bob Foote would
stop jitterbugging with all the cute
Sophomore girls and give the rest
of the boys a chance. Be sure and
ask Bill Boy about what happened
over at his house Sunday afternoon
. . . gad Bill I thought your mother
had you better trained.
Jerry Eppler is still recovering
from Sat. night when he drank
those two fleet boys, Grinaker and
Beals, under the table. We wish
that the fleet boys would tell us a
little more about their experiences
(with girls, of course) .instead of
sitting around studying.
Who said that the PAL pledges
were knockouts—why we have seen
better in Esquire. The Editors of
Stuff wish to take this time to up-
hold the. decision of Postmaster
General Walker in which he banded
that scandalous magazine Esquire
from the mail. Esky and his doings
(etchings,-etc.) were definitely un-
dermining the' morale and morals
of the country as a whole and the
navy in particular. Alan (Hocky)
Chapman is becoming known as the
safest date on the campus . . . even
though 'Alan' means a Rushin'
wolfhound (see Webster's).
Gerhardt has been chasing KiKi
Smith but his ankle has been hold-
ing him down. We all wonder why
the boys call J. B. Davis "Jug," and
Dave Parrish "66." Maybe it is be-
cause of their respective abilities.
John (Red Hoss) Whittenburg says,
in answer to the question of the
week, "My toes don't curl at all,
'cause women don't bother me."
In answer to the requests of all
the freshman and most of the
sophomore girls we submit our defl-
m
The rioters of this column are
sick and tired of rioting about the
boys in the service, so we have tak-
en it upon ourselves to
few of the outstanding girls.
Rear-Admiral
better known as Duchess, has
seen around school of late, on a
short furlough from testing cotton
fabrics for the shipyard workers.
We may quote her as saying, "the
material is of the finest quality."
General Major McAshcan has
been doing her bit for the war ef-
fort by collecting dirt for Civilian
Defense. Among her well known
lemon aides are such tripe collec-
tors as Maribelle Spills-it, Beth
Helpful, and Jane Sinner.
Marry Jerk Jarvis is planning on
making a secret mission to Austin
this month for the Intelligence Di-
reveal aH to the public at a later
date.
Admiral of Rice, Estelle LUabsy,
has lately been made head of the
bridge playing (construction) de-
partment of Rice. The importance
of this department can not be
stressed enough for the education of
the Navy boys.
Captain Betty Lands'em, of the
Air Corps, has been made. an in-
structor in advanced training at
Corn Field. Her famous sister,
Anne, has just returned from over-
seas duty in the Nurses Corps
where she's been man-euvering. 1
Fancy Majors and Lena Hold-
your-man, are General-Mess Serge-
ents in the Tank Corps.
Gunner's Mate 3rd Class, Reba
They-say, says "don't sun around
much anymore." 'Snuf said.
nition of F.O. It means Fouled Out.
Disappointed? Well so were we.
Has Dick Clemens heard the lat
est? Marfy's been sported every-
where lately .by that dashing, dim-
pled, daring young Gene Mason.
Humpy is losing weight chasing
Floyd Simonds, that bachelor-on-
the campus who just refuses to be
caught.
Charlie Jones, the most forward
boy in the V-12, has been seen
showering lavish attentions on the
quiet, shy, unassuming Margee
Scott.
We weren't the least bit aston-
ished to see Murray Smythe and
Jean Garrison at Prof. Finkelstein's
revijpw of his latest book, "The Sig-
nificance of the Sales Tax, and Ar-
guments Pro and Con in our War-
time World."
We understand that the intellec-
tual Ada Dean is coaching Donald
McCann these days—but, in what?
We just heard that Tomforde has
just asked Lucille Kemp to go
steady, and; is breathlessly awaiting
her reply.
Flashety-flash: the latest new
campus romance, Lida Kittrell and
Billy Love seen Hermann park-ing.
Many comments heard about
Dorothy Jean robbing the cradle
with the freshman ex-quiz kid, Jer-
ry Hamovits.
Leslie Cookenboo has a hard time
keeping up with athletic Margie
Stroup, but you should see them
flinging a mean one at the Hat.
Everyone at the Ranch Club the
other night noticed a gay gathering
of gruesome twosomes from the
Institute. Included in the party were
Allene Lummis escorted by.. Chili,
Jean Brock and Bill "Shorty" Hen-
ry, Ella McAshan and H. J. "Wolf"
Nichols, Ann Martin and Pat Ryan,
and Virginia Barrett with Van de
Mark.
The latest news from the battle-
front is that Poujol has married So-
phia Wheeler after a whirlwind
courtship.
Recent campus scenes, very much
in evidence: Mary Simpson, Sara
Meredith, and Midge Schumann
chasing fifteen and a half sailors
through Sallyport—(who was the
half?); Maribel Spiller and Bob
Palmer courting behind the statue;
Madge West holding hands with
Tommy Roach; and Jimmie (the
Profile) Kisling looking with amor-
ous eyes at Bobby Sahol.
Noticeable Incidents
Herbie nevgr seen but with one
girl—at a time, of course.
Then there's that flock of babes
that won't dance with Chili because
he's too short. (That is the most
insane statement we've ever made).
Sallyport absolutely jammed and
packed with all sorts of Navy boys.
Young girls shying away from
Juddy Helmcamp because he's* just
too much man. (Oh no, this has got
to go).
A week passing by without the
"Bug" and Kialing having a feud.
Shaw and Sells giving up bird-
doggin', tomcattin', and various and
sundry other things.
Dave Adrian dating a Rice girl
—and such heavenly eyes, too.
Fred Amsler bluntly refusing to
ask Sue Haynie for a date. (No, no,
I can't go on like this).
0
"THE FOWL"—
(Continued from page 1)
minor a detail as the cover which
only Siakes the firslt impression."
Eagerly we turn to the inside and
find jokes; well 'tenny rate that's
what they're supposed to be. We
believe that all would be saved in
this department if the staff would,
caption the column "Warning! Foul
Jokes"—proceed at your own risk.
Oh well, just a minor detail, jokes
are just what the reader seeks,
that's all!
Ah ha! We've come to the body
of this mag. Spotlighted t/his time
is a map who ten years ago gave
the Institute his favorite sod of St.
Augustine. Not a bad article either,
vital to school life, to alumni read-
ers, and to the lawn. This story is
by Maryss Jones, if you know whom
I mean.
But to the Sallyharbor and Vi-
vace! And what's here? Can't you
guess? Oh I forgot; the Fowl hasn't
come out since you began your
stretch in this Institution three
years ago. The Fowl, my dear
friends, is that no good (as you may
have gathered) "magazine which
spasmotically appears when its
staff has a new ed., the old one hav-
ing been lynched following the ap-
pearance of the last Fowl. In Sal-
lyhartoor are some dated articles
about people and events of four
months ago for this is the semi-an-
nual appearance of tihe Fowl. But in
Vivace you find those trite little
unriming couplets which "only the
Foul (oops! typographical error!)
can dream up. Slams and Salutes!
More graft! How long do you sup-
pose it takes them to think up those
mean phrases? Fiendish genius at
its best! We love the Fowl's com-
ments on people, things, events;
this is the funniest part of the whole
mag.
Pomes by Morphine Margaret
"take the cake." They were made
for three year olds. Their obvious
rhyithm and less obvious purpose
sometimes tragically amusing. And
we affectionately read those stag-
nant stories, journalistic efforts of
? writers.
And the news of the classes is so
cleaver. Nothing dull, just nothing!
>Ofi well, I guess the Fowl has to
put up with dull duds when the
rally talented are all on that good
ole Thresher Staff.
Fashions leave me flabergasted!
Bags and gauncihes, Rice girls! We
want smooth gals with gams and"
—and—well, you know! And how
'bout some good pics? Or doesn't
thl Fowl staff know of the inven-
tion of the camera? Surely they
do; they're sooo prompt0 and up to
date!
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The Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 30, No. 4, Ed. 1 Saturday, April 1, 1944, newspaper, April 1, 1944; Houston, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth230609/m1/2/?rotate=270: accessed July 18, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Rice University Woodson Research Center.