The Rice Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 64, No. 18, Ed. 1 Monday, November 8, 1976 Page: 4 of 8
eight pages : ill. ; page 20 x 14 in.View a full description of this newspaper.
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9
K
&
8
No matter how sophisti-
cated and intelligent you tell
yourself you are, you cannot
avoid those spontaneous
attacks of silly escapading
and lighthearted frolic which
are unmistakable symptoms
of a case of the "kiddies". Tell
the truth. When you pop an
M&M into your mouth, don't
you feel the creeping urge to
pretend just once more for old
times' sake that that little oval
candy is in reality a power pill
which transforms you into a
good guy with superhuman
strength? Or at Baskin-
Robbins, wouldn't you love to
ignore the common crowd and
eat your ice cream cone the
way you used to, by biting the
bottom of the cone off and
sucking the Rocky Road
scoops out through the tip,
which always worked until
one of the marshmallows
plugged the channel and so
you bit some more of the cone
off to make the hole bigger
with the unavoidable pro-
verbial result that you had
indeed bitten off more than
you could chew and were
sporting a 50% polyester, 25%
dacron, 25% chocolate polo
shirt.
It afflicts Senior and
Freshman alike. Just this past
week as I sat meditating over
noontime chow, my friend
Chuck was in the tricky
process of maneuvering his
fudgesicle so the fudge and the
underlying ice cream would
stay on the stick where it
belongs instead of falling off
and landing in his lap where it
does not belong. However, he
The Teachings of Jose Cuervo:
LI
How to get
the juices
flowing."
The best way to get the juices flowing is to get
plugged into the best tequila. Jose Cuervo White.
Because Jose Cuervo is the premium white tequila.
And it has been since the first day it was made in 1795.
Then the rest is simple. Just get plugged into the
best juices. Take orange juice, for example. Or grape-
fruit, or pineapple. Or whatever.
-mr.
ivwicn: -i
JOSE CUERVO* TEQUILA 80 PROOF IMPORTED AND BOTTLED BY © 1976 HEUBLEIN, INC., HARTFORD. CONN.
the rice thresher, november 8, 1976—page 4
made the fatal mistake of
succumbing to temptation and
bit off a crucial section which
must have been the thing's
center of mass or something,
because the next moment he
was sheepishly grinning over
the fact that his hand was a
makeshift bowl for the
dripping, sticky mess that had
renounced its allegiance to
anything so restrictive as a
wooden stick. Undaunted, he
finished it Viking style.
I myself decided to save
mine and eat it later, so I
gingerly skipped (an ability I
am particularly proud of,
seeing as how I mastered
before most of my peers) into
my suitemates room and
started to stick it into the
freezer when one of my suitees
told me it would do no good
because ice cream only freezes
at temperatures below 0
degrees F., which I did not
want to believe and argued
with him about although he
was just trying to be helpful
and I had the feeling that he
was right and it annoyed me
because I still intended to stick
it into the freezer anyway and
he didn't have to say that it
would serve me right if it
melted which made me mad
so that at the time I was about
ready to give in to a childish
temper and stick the son of a
bitch in his hair as a matter of
principle but refrained
through a sheer act of self-
control, something I practice
fifteen minutes a day in front
of the bathroom mirror and
have gotten quite good at. (Eat
your heart out, Faulkner.)
Being rather easily amused
and fascinated with the simple
things in life, I was in awe as
my roommate demonstrated to
me how he could turn on his
fluorescent desk lamp with a
sock, or a comb for that matter.
It's all due to static charge of
course, but that does not make
it any less fascinating, just as
a scientific explanation
detracts nothing from the
beauty of a rainbow. And I did
not feel the least bit silly
turning off the overhead death
ray and running a staticked-
up comb along a desk light
tube, just as the nineteen
hundred of you out there will
not feel silly tonight when you
diligently make passes at your
study lamps with recently
dried socks and hair brushes
and God knows what else.
Because it is no worse than the
times you have wrestled in the
grass on the way back from the
Pub or practiced trampoline
exercises on your bed or
intentionallly put too many
kernels in the pop corn popper
or converted the quadrangle
into a makeshift Slip and Slide
with a fire hose or...
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McFarland, Carla. The Rice Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 64, No. 18, Ed. 1 Monday, November 8, 1976, newspaper, November 8, 1976; Houston, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth245309/m1/4/: accessed June 30, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Rice University Woodson Research Center.