The Rice Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 65, No. 13, Ed. 1 Thursday, November 3, 1977 Page: 3 of 16
sixteen pages : ill. ; page 20 x 14 in.View a full description of this newspaper.
Extracted Text
The following text was automatically extracted from the image on this page using optical character recognition software:
ft
8
s
&
THE FAST LIFE—Plans for
coed conversion still seem up
in the air as Dean Batherine
Drown recommended a plan
different from that submitted
to her by the Committee of
College Pastors and Resi-
dents. Her proposal would
have Jones and Lovett delay
conversion for a year, while
Will Rice would convert to an
all-male college at the start of
the coming fall semester.
When told that Will Rice
already was an all-male
college, Dean Drown simply
crossed out the words Will Rice
wherever they occurred and
substituted Richardson. She
feels confident that this new,
revised proposal will pass
without any opposition.* After
being interrupted by a silly
black star, Dean Drown
continued to say that her main
concern was with the women's
colleges, and the Brown-Jones
Formal in particular. She said,
"The idea of two female
colleges having a dance
together is really quite
revolting, and while I'm no
prude, it makes me want to
puke my guts out." Hopefully
Jones' conversion to a coed
college will alleviate this
rather regretable situation.
BIG SNOTS—In the string of
Russian dissidents to speak on
campus lately, none has
reached the height of
dissidence attained by Rusky
Sauri Ibitchertitov. After
blowing his nose on a
photograph of Lenin, he
proceeded to call the top
Commie officials every foul
name he could think of, from
"borscht breath" to "blintz
buttocks." He then read
dissident poetry for the next
two hours, and exploded when
a member of the audience
asked him what it meant. His
reply ran something like, "Is
not suppose to mean nothing,
is suppose to be dissident."
Future Russian speakers will
be screened by filling out a
form which asks them to
complete the statement, "I am
8000 dissident, that once I..."
OUR THURSDAY PHOTO
STAR is the eleventh person
left of center in the ninth row,
who wishes to remain
anonymous, having partici-
pated in kinky sex acts with
small furry things under guise
of participating in a
government study. This photo
star likes running over pets in
residential areas and sticking
wads of gum on the underside
of restaurant tables. Immedi-
ately after this photo was
taken our photo star got up
and did something absolutely
unmentionable in the lap of
the person one row behind
wearing sunglasses.
CATCH-SHIT—Recent at-
tempts by the SA Senate to
sabotage RPC activities has
resulted in animosity between
these two groups. After several
appeals to the RPC asking
them to stop making the
Senate look so do-nothing, the
Senate feels that more drastic
measures need to be taken.
Says SA President Clod
Sissy,"They're just so
unreasonable. Last year it was
a carnival, this year it's a
drive-in movie, next year it
could be a bowling alley. They
get all the glamor. We're sick
and tired of getting stuck with
things like the student
directory." Rumor has it that
to avoid being shown up, the
Student Senate is going to
declare the stadium parking
lot an SA dependent, excuse
me, affiliate, organization,
and refuse to let the RPC use it
unless the RPC makes it look
like the Senate is sponsoring
the movie.
DUM DUM GANG—Trasher
editor Pill Parker recently
disclosed the reason for the
delay in production of the last
issue. "Well, our typeset
system died on us, and after
several useless attempts at
reviving it with the office
hammer we concluded that
things were looking pretty
bleak. So, we resorted to
cutting individual letters out
of local newspapers and
sticking them down on the
layout sheets." This is not a
new habit, but an extension of
last year's practice of cutting
whole articles out of local
newspapers and sticking them
down on the layout sheets.
STUPID PEOPLE—College
Bowl fever has bitten the
campus lately, with teams of
know-it-alls coming from all
over to match twits. Wits. One
question which stumped both
teams at a recent match
though was the twenty-point
toss-up question: "What is big,
pink, and squishy?" Not even
one contestant reached for his
buzzer, and no one in the
audience seemed to know the
answer either, consoling
themselves with suppressed
giggle fits. The question was
thrown out, however, after it
was discovered that it was
supposed to read: "What was
the name of the New York
governor who pushed legisla-
tion forward on the Erie Canal
construction?"
FLASH—It has just been
announced that when this
issue of the Trasher is ready
to go to press, the Associate
Editor will treat the rest of the
staff to a scrumptious dawn
DOONESBUBT
meal at Perky's, that chic
emporium of Perky Pies, Perky
Salad Sandwiches, Perky Air
Puff Fries, and toast! After a
night of bickering over
whether the record reviews
will appear as usual in this
week's issue, the Dissident
Editor will be obnoxious to the
waitress and cause a scene out
of sheer exhaustion. Neverthe-
less, a fun time will be had by
all.
^ <5$
ROLAND, I WONDER IF
YOU COULD EXPLAIN TV
US HOUJ YOUR REPORT ON
STUDENTS HULL FTT INTO
ABC NEWS' TAG-TEAM
well, rr works like this, mark.
HARM REASONER., the super -
ANCHOR, TEASES THE STORY FROM
NEW YORK. THEN HE THROWS IT
TO THE REGIONAL MINI-ANCHOR IN
BOSTON, WHO DOES TUE LEAD'IN!
WE THEN FEW MY IN-DEPTH MINI-
DOCUMENTARY, ALONG WITH TWO
FOLLOUI-UP MICRO-DOCUMENTARIES,
AND THEN WHIP AROUND FOR THE
WRAP-UP AND MINI-COMMENTARY
3Y THE BACKUP CO-SUPER-ANCHOR!
/
HE'S A
TYPICAL
STUDENT?
i IS THAT
TRUE,
I SON?
DARN RIGHT, IT'S
TRUE, ROLAND/
ERICH HERE IS
ABOUT AS TYPICAL
AS THEY COME!
N
OH,
WOW.
PRACTICALLY,
ERICH! ISNT
it exciting?
REALLY
FROM ABC
SPORTS,
zonk?
OKAY, NOW 1ST I SMOKE A
ME GET DOWN LTTTLE, I'M
SOME NOTES! DO MIDDLE-OF-THE
YOU SMOKE, SON? ROAD, I 6ET
WHAT ARE YOUR. STRAIGHT Cs!
POLITICS? GRADES? /
r\
OKAY, ALAN,
I GOT THE KID!
YOU READY
TO 60?
yup!
let's
do it!
ERICH UPSETT IS A STUDENT.
NOT A BRILLIANT STUDENT. NOT
EVEN A PARTICULARLY 6/FTED
ONE. HE IS, HOWEVER, TYPICAL.
ERICH, WHAT'S THE
UM.. WELL, X OUNNO.. HE'S
LI KB.. UH.. AN ALL-AROUND
GUY.. YOU KNOW, JUST A
REGULAR PERSON, GOES
^U-u, TO A LOT OF MOVIES
AND STUFF.
typical student
like these days7
n
ZONKER HARRIS IS A VETERAN
COLLEGE STUDENT WITH HIS
EAR TO THE GROUND. TELL ME,
1 ZONKER, WHAT'S THE SC£NE
LIKE TODAY? ARE KIDS STILL
I "TURNING ON"AND "TUNING OUT"?
THEY CERTAINLY ARE, ROLAND,
AND IN EVER- GROWING NUMBERS!
WHILE THE USE OF "ACID"IS DOWN,
OTHER STAPLES SUCH AS "GRASS"
AND ''COKE" HAVE REGISTERED
A, IMPRESSIVE GAINS I
HOWEVER, BY THE END OF THE
YEAR, I'D LOOK FOR. MORE"DOWN-
ERS" AND I THINK YOU'LL FIND
MANY STUDENTS WILL BE MOVING
TOWARD THE MORE TRADTTIONAL
CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM PEPRES-
20NKER HARRIS, YOU'RZ
WIDELY REGARDED AS
AN ASTUTE OBSERVER
OF THE LOCAL CAM- YES,
PUS SCENE.. THIS IS
TELL US, THEN, 20NKER,
WHAT'S HAPPENING THERE
THESE DAYS? IS THERE
ANYTHIN6 GONG ON THAT
HAS PEOPLE CONCERNED?
X
HEY. LOOK, IF YOU'RE TRYING
TO GET ME 10 COMMENT ON
THE WIFE-SWAPPIN6 AT THE
FACULTY CUJ 'B PARTIES, YOU
. CAN JUST FORGET FT!
ZONKER, WE'VE HEARD A
LOT ABOUT THE * TYPICAL "
STUDENT TODAY! THEY RIGHT.
\ SAY HE'S PRAGMATIC, HE S
- CAREER-ORIENTED, ALSO A
" SELF-INVOLVED.. WOMAN.
~~ / ~ /
9M
f"
COME
AGAIN?
AS OF THIS
YEAR, THERE ARE
MORE WOMEN EN-
ROLLED IN COLLEGE
THAN MEN!
:stgh-
oh, no.
cut!
SI
r.
UM, I HOPE
THAT WASN'T YEAH, BUT
TOO TECH- TTWAS
WORTH TT.
/
N/CAL..
PERFECT! UM..STILL BUT THAT'S
HOW ABOUT MOSTLY NORMAL FOR
YOUR SBX HYPO- A SOPHO-
UFE? THET/CAL. MORE.!
\ I
IS ERICH'S
PORTRAIT A
FAIR ONE?
WELL, ABC
NEWS WILL
BE.. \
rollie
we're
FROM YOUR
NOSE!
R/QHT. THE
you mean..
alcohol?/
KIDS CALL
TT'GETTING
PLASTERED"
OR 'BOMBED."
CLOSE-UP, YOU'D JUST
alan! in blow tt up
TT6HT on ALL out of
him! proportion!
J*'?1
:0> "M
3
ALRIGHT, ALAN,
WE'RE GOING TV
NEED SOME FOOT-
AGE- OF A WOMAN.'
I
sot tt.
an ah
MACGRAW
14i2>
the rice thresher, november 3, 1977—page 3
Upcoming Pages
Here’s what’s next.
Search Inside
This issue can be searched. Note: Results may vary based on the legibility of text within the document.
Tools / Downloads
Get a copy of this page or view the extracted text.
Citing and Sharing
Basic information for referencing this web page. We also provide extended guidance on usage rights, references, copying or embedding.
Reference the current page of this Newspaper.
Parker, Philip. The Rice Thresher (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 65, No. 13, Ed. 1 Thursday, November 3, 1977, newspaper, November 3, 1977; Houston, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth245350/m1/3/: accessed July 18, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Rice University Woodson Research Center.