The Houston Post. (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 27, Ed. 1 Tuesday, January 9, 1912 Page: 6 of 14
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HOUSTON POST
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... Houston Texas. Tuesday January 9 1912-
ABOUT PRESIDENTIAL PRIMARIES.
The agitation for presidential primaries In
the country at large ought to suggest the.
futility of that method of selecting presi-
dential candidates. Where public sentiment
largely favors one man lie is certain to get
the nomination. Eren the two-thirds rule
has not operated to defeat the popular choice.
So far as our recollection goes not even a
majority candidate has been defeated by the
two-thirds rale sinee the. war.
What good conld a National primary sys-
tem do In a year like this when there will
be a large field of faro rite sons. Alabama
for Instance would give Mr. Underwood the
majority bet with Mr. Underwood out of the
no the delegation would be free to rote
Its preferences. The same rule would work
tn the ease of Ohio with Governor Harmon
as the favorite son; In New Jersey with Gov-
ernor Wilson as the favorite; In Indiana
with Governor Marshall as the favorite; In
Missouri with Governor Polk or Speaker
dark as the favorite; in Massachusetts with
Governor Foss as the favorite; In Maine
wit's Voremor Flalsted as the favorite; hi
Nebraska with Mr. Bryan as the favorite.
It is not only certain that no candidate
win obU-'n a two-thirds majority on the first
ballot but that It is almost beyond the range
of possibility that any candidate will
receive a majority on the first ballot Of
what value then would the presidential pri-
mary be? It would merely tend to accen-
tuate bitter local differences without afford-
ing any reasonable Indication of the popular
choice. There Is likely to be a dozen or more
favorite sons in the race and as they drop
out delegates will be released to vote their
preferences.
Far more important that the presidential
primary is the cool deliberation of the dele-
gates when the convention meets in an ef-
fort to select a candidate who can win. It Is
possible that a majority of the democrats ot
the country would prefer Mr. Bryan as first
. choice but there is none so obtuse that he
doesn't know Mr. Bryan could not be elected.
.Then what would be the good of nominating
him?
Some of the best men in the party are th9
least available. Any sensible man knows
that. In every presidential battle the contest
arrows down to three or four States. There
are certain States that are unquestionably
democratic; there are others that are as cer-
tainly republican. Thus the question Is pre-
sented which aspirant would be most likely
to carry these debatable States?
Snppoee for1 Instance that the man deemed
strongest in the debatable States were not
as "progressive" M mOBt ot n would like
or sot as "conservative" as most of us would
like. It would still be the better politics to
nominate him If we could elect him because'
aa a party we can not accomplish anything
out of power. The most conservative demo-
crat assuming that the debatable State are
conservative would still be preferable to a
continuation of republican ascendancy. These
' are consideration that the clamorers for
presidential primaries might think of to ad-
vantage if they really desire the election of a
democratic president
G7TKJrOR WILSON AND C0L011T.L
V HAiVET.v
'JJ Verily politics hath Its vicissitudes. Con-
aider for Instance that report of a break
between Governor Wilson and Colonel George
r Harrey. editor of Harper's Weekly. Else-
. .'.where on this psge Is printed the New York
Son's dispatch from Trenton as well as the
"-r .:reenrt or its teiepnone inquiry or Colonel
THarrey for the particulars.
v Thji rnnrt waa that Pjivamn 11'! T.nn
( nuco a ioiuuei narvey suggesting mat
;7. t Ha rnlrkfifkl'a Interest In tha VxrnaAn
. . . .. iuu . .usu iuvj i j-
ment was hurting rather than helping the
" cans. We do not know of course that
4i'- euch a letter was written but Colonel Har
!y VeT doesn't denv that anmn mrh ini..iiinii
t Vwas made to him and Governor Wilson
; vjJ has been willing to say only that there hss
-i been no break In the relation k.i. m
and the distiniruisheri editor nf th n-wi
5i: i dis iaci remains Dowever. Colonel Har-
V very is the originator of the Wilson boom
;i Some years ago when Governor Wilson was
. exploiting his political Dhllosonhv alone r-nn-
ft aerrative lines the Weekly declared he was
if.the kind of man who ought to be president
.. and even after the governor had made the
' transit from lifelong conservatism to ex-
frame redicalism. the colonel diii not nr
- Some weeks ago he Issued a Wilson edition
Ji'ot the Weekly which set forth brilliantly the
. .Vv:1' efllnnetf'a nnitlmfolahttit atmiratls.n . v.
"'. li.vfew Jersey statesman
y sf ; Perhaps It was that laudatory production
i that alarmed the governor. Be it remem-
v.bered that Colonel Harvey has been fre-
quently accused of being a Wall Street
; ' mouthpiece. Mr. Bryan has on several occa-
atona made the charat and haa rimantui '
. ' i Mat of tho owners ot the Weekly and other
V pabUcatlons conducted by Colonel Harvey.
. Slacame politicians of New York and New
Jersey hare also disliked the colonel because
of his mugwumpenr addiction. It is possible.
r of course that they are telling the governor.
who Is now becoming a practical politician
that the Harvey influence hurts and perhaps
the governor haa been made to believe. It
and believing It he haa asked the colonel as
an act of friendship to say nothing more In
his behalf.
If the story Is untrue we trust the fact
will be made known la some authentic man-
ner. As the matter stands we are inclined
to sympathixe with Colonel Harvey. It must
be humiliating to the editor of a high-class
publication like the Weekly to be asked as a
matter ot friendship to remain silent It is
or at leest would be. a reflection upon the
wide Influence to which Colonel Harvey can
Justly lay claim.
Another phase of the case Is this: In
politics the custom Is to co-ordinate widely
different elements and factions if possible.
That Is to say if a man be sincerely in favor
of another's candidacy he is not apt to care
how many or his personal enemies" may be
lined up In support of his favorite. It we
were called upon to analyze motives we
should say thst the men who complained to
Governor Wilson of Colonel Harvey were not
Governor Wilson's friends at all. but that i
their object was to create a breach between
two old-time friends and deprive the one of
the beprul support and Influence of the
other.
As we have said in the beginning we do
not know how much truth there is In the
New York Sun story but the Weekly does
not seem to be saying anything further in
advocacy of the candidacy of Governor Wil-
son. GOOD ROADS AND THE FEDERAL GOV-
ERNMENT. The movement to raid the United States
treasury for the construction of good roads
which seems to be growing in popularity in
some sections of the country despite the prin-
ciple of paternalism which is Involved in it.
Is strongly opposed by the Engineeriu?
News. In a recent article it shows that the
injection of congress into the movement for
good roads would have a demoralizing effect
en the work that the States counties and
cities are now doing within the sphere of
their respective duties and unquestioned
rights.
The publication in question maintains that
It is in accordance with the sound principles
of government that it should be left to the
cltifs to pave their own streets the country
towns to provide such roads as heir taxpay-
ers can afford to build and the State to con-
struct and control the main highways whoso
condition is important to the communities in
the area' which they traverse.
The News further affirms that if good
roads really produce the great benefits to the
communities in which they are built that
the good roads advocates claim then the
localities which receive the benefit should
bear the burden of paying for it. For these
and other reasons said journal deprecates
the Intention of the American Automobile as
sociation to hold a convention at Washington
on January 11 for the purpose of trying to
obtain from congress appropriations for road
building.
The Fof-t has heretofore expressed its re-
gret at the apparent growth of s sentiment
which looks to the Federal government for
aid in th; construction of good roads in the
States and it is prepared to agree with En
gineering News that if congress were to un-
dertake to make appropriations for that pur-
pose It would only have a demoralizing ef-
fect on the work that the States and coun-
ties are doing for themselves but it would
open up a new avenue for Federal activity
and a waste of the public revenues insepar-
able from such an extension of the functions
of the general government that would more
than offset any possible good that could pos-
sibly accrue from such a wide departure
from the established operations of our gov-
ernment The good roads agitation is already meet-
ing with effective results In awakening the
people of the States to what they may ac-
complish for themselves and this awakening
should not he Interfered with hy diverting
their attention to schemes designed to se-
cure appropriations from the Federal gov-
ernment to further the movement for the
building of good roads.
The Federal government has a hig enough
job for the time being to look after the
waterways system of the country and any
diversion of attention from this pressing
duty to engage in road building would to
say the least be distinctly unwise.
OTJR POTATO IMPORTS.
The point of Mr. J. J. Hill's repeated warn
ing of the neglectful and unsystematic sys
tem of igriculture pursued by the American
people finds striking force in the statement
recently prepared by the bureau y statistics
department of commerce and labor showing
the imports and exports of potatoes during
a term of years. Especially is this statement
of grave concern to our farmers in view ol
the known commercial fact that at the pres
cnt time large quantities of potatoes are be-
ing imported into the United States prin-
cipally from Europe.
The statistics referred to show that the
total exports of N potatoes from the United
States during the past ten years amounted
to 10800.566 bushels valued at $8413675 an
average of 77 cents per bushel; while for the
tame period the Imports amounted to 22845-
651 bushels valued at 48 cents per bushel
this valuation being based upon the whole-
sale market price in the countries from which
imported and does not therefore include the
cost of transportation or duties paid the
rate of duty being 25 cents per bushel of
sixty pounds.
Thus within the last decade America a
country that has been wont to proudly boast
that it is capable of both clothing and feed-
ing the world has Imported tor its era coa-
tumptloa 114S(XI boshels more ot pot
toes than it has exported and yet potatoes
are not nearly so mack the 'daily bread" ot
the American people-as they are that of the
people ot Europe. It this Ir not aa example
of neglectful agriculture we are at a loss
as to where to look for a more striking one.
Yet by intelligent cultivation large yields
of potatoes may be produced at small cost
in every State ot the. Union and te some of
the States phenomenal yields they equal both
in quality and flavor ot any produced tn
Europe can be had at far lata cost ot pro-
duction than In the latter country.- " '.
As reported by the department ot agri-
culture our own crop this year la about M-
000000 boshels short and prevailing higi
TsHaA tr vmsinw vfttnttisa sa swa nlw YssatSaaw vatJ
"".VO V UISM1J UIVHWS WI BHBlinv WVSU VUl
the statement Nor need we Indulge the
vain hope of a material lowering. of prlcee-n
until w ourselves produce another crop
ample in volume to meet the demands for
our own consumption as available statistics
show that none of the European crops are
ample except that ot Russia and sfacevsrlth
that country we are not on the best of terms
we may not look for any commercial bar-
gains from that source.
If the American people want to prosper
they must get out of the agricultural ruts in
which they have been wont to travel and
raise not only more potatoes but more and
a greater variety of other foodstuffs for the
production of which their soils are so richly
capable.
They fed a mince p e t a hippo pat am m in
thr New York aoo. If it waa a pie constructed
according to the Houston formula we will lay a
simolcon that the hippo thought for a few hours
that a democrat had been elected president of the
United S'atea.
The governor of Oklahoma teems to favor the
calling down of judges.
The authorities of a Massachusetts town have
forb dden any kissing whatever as a precaution
against diphtheria. It won't work. When peo-
ple want to kiss they will do to even if they
have to atick their heads in a hornet's nest to
make the conjunction.
There are more razors in the world now than
ever before and also more whiskers.
And if it were true as Mme. Maeterlinck as-
serts that there is no such thing as a future ex-
igence hew could the democratic party b ade-
quately rewarded (or its purity self-denial and
unselfish wiliingncss to manage the postal service
until Gauriel blows his trumpet?
Denver announces a great grandmother 47
years old. The girls of that family evidently
think they have no time to lose.
Our understanding is that the Houston Sons of
Rest arc vnan mous in the belief that the saloons
should serve hut soup with the free lunches dar-
ing the co'.d weather and provide chairs in the
vicinity ot the stoves so they can be comfortabl:
indoors.
Mr. Burleson wants to chop off the president's
traveling allowance. Haven't those tp'ps greatly
improved democratic prospects?
As pred cted. Secretary ot War Srimson paid
a visit to Colonel Roosevelt and thereafter an-
nounced that the colonel would not be a candi-
date. Te next announcement is due on Friday
n.omins. according to our calculations.
Houston's muddy streets remind us we can
make the town stihlime and by paving leave be-
hind us decent highways all the time.
The Charlotte Observer reiterates its belief
that nr. Conk discovered the North Pole. If he
can swallow that story why did it take so long
for the major to embrace the truth of the Great
Declaration and of the Birth?
Somebody says cab fares of two bits a mile are
probable in New York. Maybe the price of gold
bricks will also fall if the cabbies relent.
There was woe in Georgie the other day. A
freight train containing five cars of whisky was
sidetracked two days on account of a broken down
engine and Atlanta and Macon were mad enough
to tear up the railroad tracks.
Of course there are not enough Lillian Rut-
Bells in this country to go round but dear Mias
Russell is going round as far aa she can.
We gather from the Chattanooga Times that it
facrs a lock and dam for Tennessee. So long
as the Tennessee democratic lock remains there
it very ?pt to be an abundance of Tennessee
d?mns.
Duluth claims to be the coldest place in the
United States but we fancy the poor unpaid
school teachers of Georgia know betteT than that
That is a pretty grouchy anarl in the demo-
cratic ranks in Missouri. It seems to us that the
democrats there are wasting time snarling so long
as a republican administration controls the State.
It seems to us that most of the suffragettes
ought td be satisfied so long as Editor Bok is
permitted to vote. That is almost woman's suf-
frage. This seems to be the situation : Lina Cavalieri
has been legally separated from her husband Rob-
ert W'inthrop Chanler and Mr. Clianler has been
Icaglly separated from $70000 is money.
The New York Tribune says Colonel Roose-
velt is amused at the reports of his wanting a
third term. Our understanding is he is hilarious
about them.
Senator l.a Follette returns to Washington and
tells the reporters the people are aroused every-
where. We suspect however they are not half
so aroused as the senator's vertical locks.
The new cotton picker is aaid to be a wonder
but we fancy that the most remarkable thing
about it is that it won't steal watermelons of
chickens.
Senator La Follette and Mr. Bryan arrived in
the union station in Washington simultaneously
and later explained that it was an accident. There
were no causuaJties.
There will hardly be many ladies to propose
during the present leap year the high coat of liv-
ing making the support of a husband rather a
burdensome undertaking.
Mr. John ' R. McLean's Ohio newspaper is
against Harmon ; his Washington paper is against
Wilson and Mb MrsaSfS himself ft ot for anyv
body
Ik i .
i y Som OtHer Views : r :
The WaaahacsM Eaterpftae thiaks h Is eftea
the case that centrssaona lose 4helr heads m
their great desire te save their seala Aad soring
the list of tandidates we suspect that some of
thean will lose their vsoee? in their great desire
to save theft country.
The Tyler Courier-Times doesn't think "there
is any excuse far trains funding lat day after
day. No but it slight prove iacowvenlent for the
public if the trains oa seme of the reads we have
in Bind should rua ea time it would be se uu-
expectccU The- coming of the later urban . stay
remedy the evil ef continual 'delays. Anyway we
hope so.
The Terrell Transcript says Terrell is the only
town in the State thst has compulsory educa-
tion and qucriea: "How is that far being Wader
in reforms and commendable moves?" It's great
but what we would like to know is 'whether or
not the children of the poor people whe sre com-'
pelleS to attead are furnished with tree text
books. After all it aaid and don the inability
to secure books is the greatest headieaa ef edu-
cation in Texas that we know ot
The Cameron Heralds says a number ef out-
door speakers are preparing for exceptional ac-
tivities but fortunately there are .stumps enough
to go 'round. Yea enough for the candidates
perhaps but we question the probability of there
being any left for the friends ef the candidates.
When we hear a girl declare aha will not go
with a crowd of young folks to a pioaie unless
they have a chaperon we somehow warm up to
the girl and feel like shaking her hand. Four
Stalts Prtsj.
We are now absolutely certain that the editor
of the Four States Press has reached the age of
discretion which we calculate is about three-j
score and ten. j
. The Calvert Picayune says it can not under-
stand why the senatorial aspirants do not make
a fuss. They are probably busy now getting data
on each other with which to make a fuss later on.
The Athens Review says the general opinion
is that there is moisture enough in the earth to
make another crop with the 'usual summer rain-
fall. Well if there isn't then we'd like to knew
how any crops have ever been made. A foot of
rain in s month in Houston is going some.
The McGregor Mirror says the loyal citiien is
the man who can be depended upon in any emer-
gency. Then we take it that Houston is com-
posed almost entirely of loyal citizens because
emergencies arise daily here where it is neces-
sary to depend upon the citizenship. Great is
Houston and her citizenship but taking advantage
of every opportunity will make her greater still.
The old saying is true that 'heaven helps them
that help themselves but unfortunately there are
people so lazy that they want heaven or their
wives to do all the work. Z-tafW City Herald.
Evidently then heaven has helped a lot of
folks we read about who have undoubtedly helped
themselves to whatever they wanted.
NEEDS OF TEXAS TOWNS.
Smithv.lle needs more homes there is not a
vacant dwelling in the city. Smilhvillt Timet.
Wanted An epidemic of sidewalk and brick
street crossings. Apply to McKinney Texas.
McKmney Corir-Gvtttt.
- We wart 'to see Hamilton grow. Better streets
and sidewiaks are necessary if we are to attract
strangers with' capital. Hamilton Htraid.
No news is good news. Otherwise we'd have a
couple of wonders over the nonamval of that
$50000 for the municipal wharf. Carpus Ckristi
Calltr.
The Corsicana Sun ia waging a hot fight for a
court houae clock. The Sun has our sympathy.
We know what it is up agatnat. Goinetrille
Re lister.
A citizen of near Terrell remarks that the
streets of the town including the principal ones
sre worse than country roads. How much longer
is this reproach to continue? Terrell Transcript.
We need to say that the city's d'rt streets need
surfacing with artel! or other durable material.
W e ought to have a hundred miles more of shelled
streets and the shelling ought to be done this
summer when the weather is good. Beaumont
Eh lerfrise.
New Twenty-third "Salm."
(From the Hnntsville Post-Item.)
1. My wife is the boss I shall not deny.
i. She maketh me to lie down behind the bed
when swell company comes and she leadeth me
behind her up Main street.'
3. She reitoreth toy pocketbook after she has
spent all its contents on hobble skirts and theater
tickets and she feadeth me up the main aisle at
the church for her new hat's sake.
4. Yea. though I walk more than half the night
through the dark raoms with a crying baby I
will get 110 rest for she is behind me ; her broom-
stick and her hatpin do everything else but com-
fort me.
- 5. She prepareth a cold snack for me then she
maketh a bee line for an aid society supper. She
anointeth my head with a rolling pin occasionally.
My arms runneth over with bundles before the is
half done shopping.
6. Surely her dressmaker's and millinery bills
shall follow me all the days of my life and I will
dwell in the house of my wife forever.
The Governor's Talk.
From the Waco Tribune.)
The Tribune is free to admit that it is not at
all times able to indulge in admiration and com-
mendation of the course as chief executive of the
Hon. Oscar Branch Colquitt. But we should feel
ashamed if on that account or even with a tinge
of prejudice mere was inability or lack of will-
ingness to do the chief executive of the State
justice er refuse admiration where it ia merited.
And right now we are admiring the governor -for
the spirit he displayed and the tender eloquent
and even happy words he used in his Christmas
talk to the pupils of the institute foT the blind
at Austin the other night. We are reprinting. on
this page his words for they merit reading and
appreciation. They are of the superior quality
that" almost entitles them to classical rank. They
do you great credit governor and to you as chief
magistrate of this great State we wish a Happy
New Year.
What Texas Needs.
(From the McGregor Mirror.)
Texas needs fewer lawmakers snd better ma-
terial than is usually given her. If wc are to be
governed by the laws made by the State legisla-
tore doesn't it seem ridiculous te send down
half-baked lawyers and college students to look
after such business. What we need to fill such
posi rises is wpsrieaced men men who know the
ways ef the world sad who have business judg-
ment enough te frame a law that will pass muster.
e matter how closely it is scrutinized by the
higher courts asd experienced lawyers.
aau
' : Wrongly Accused.
. (From the Port Lavaca Waive.)
' It appears from the evidence diligently gathered
by the Wave that Colonel R. M. Johnston ef The
Houston Tost has beau accused ef saying a good
snsar things that he didn't say and with doing a
snatnr
good
many thugs that he didn't da .
- ZIFram the New York Sm'M'
v Tsirraw' January 4. A reporV aaid te. have
rigiaated in Newark was circulated hers today
that there had been a break between Ceveroor ".
Wilson and Colonel George Harvey vhewsi fot
marly a dose political friend and advisor te the
governor. - .. .ufe.1 '.."
According to the story whispered by politicians
who professed to have inside information Gov-
ernor Wilson had gone to the length ot writing
a letter to- Colonel Harvey suggesting that the
colonel's active. Interest in the Wilson movement
was injuring rather than helping his cause. v
Definite information aa to -the contents ef the
supposed letter is lacking but some ef Govern er
Wilson's friends are known to have suggested that
the indorsement of Colonel Harvey was displeas-
ing to some of the democrats whom the governor
is seeking to enlist.
When Colonel Harvey was asked about this last
night over the telephone he merely asked what
the reporter bad heard about it and further he
said not.
Colonel Harvey has always been regarded m
this neighborhood aa the inventor of the Wilson
boom for the presidency. The orators who spoke
fof Vivian M. Lewis the republican opponent ef
Governor Wilson in the last gubernatorial cam-
paign in New Jesaey never loat an opportunity te
refer to the fact that Wilson't campaign was bet-
ing backed by Colonel Harvey in his paper printed
in New York.
The right hand man of Lewis used to read a
poem from the platforms around the State'in
which he pictured the colonel fixing up Gov-
ernors Wilson's nomination in a downtown office
building.
Editorially and in long interviews Harper's
Weekly was for a long time full of praise of Dr.
Wilson and of suggestion of something bigger
than the Jersey governorship for him. .There waa
hardly a number that did not contain some men-
tion Of the Jersey scholar in politics.
But in the Weekly for December j and De-
cember 30 there is no mention of Governor Wil-
son at all although there is plenty of political
matter on the editorial pages containing the usual
tilt at Roosevelt and pieces about Taft La Fol-
lette Underwood Bryan and Santa Claus. There
is an advertisement of Governor Wilson's history.
The report as it reached New York said that
Colonel Watterson waa included with Colonel Har-
vey in the list of those who had separated them-
selves or been separated from Governor Wilson's
boom.
A Slur Upon Labor.
(From the Washington Post.)
Governor Woodrow Wilson has gone further
in vhis indictment of protection than any other
democrat who is prominently mentioned for the
presidential nomination. In his speech before the
jjajional Democratic club in New York Wednes-
day night the governor according to the New
York World interpolated this paragraph into his
prepared speech :
"I should like to know how labor got into the
game. They got in because they wouldn't work
any longer unless they got their share. They
said to their employers. 'You are cutting up the
pie. we won't supply the pie unless you give us
a slice.' I don't blame them for it for it was
a game of grab all around. Their employers
were in the same game. They went to Wash-
ington and said "Who is going to pay the cam-
paign expenses next year if you don't give us
what we want?' They were on strike too.
They were combined on a strike."
In this paragraph Governor Wilson indicted all
labor as well as the employers who are benefited
by protection. He did just what the republicans
have been doing for many years when they claimed
that protection benefited labor maintained a wage
scale here that is maintained nowhere else in the
world and enabled our wage earners to live bet-
ter have more leisure to enjoy life and placed
our labor on a higher moral and intellectual
plane than could be found in any other country.
Governor Wilson admits that wages are better
here than in Europe but he attributes this to a
grab game rather than to a deliberate system for
the benefit of labor as advocated by William Mc-
Kinley Thomas B. Reed and other eminent pro-
tectionists. Had the learned college bred governor of New
Jersey seriously reflected on this we doubt if he
would have made such an indictment against
nearly 7000000 factory employes of the United
States not to mention the railroad men the coal
miners and men who are grouped into other
classes of labor in the last census statistics all
of whom share in this benefit of higher wages.
It is a pretty large number of people to indict
as in a grab game to get their special slices of
pie at the expense of the consumer. They repre-
sent a Urge part of the consumers of this coun-
try. If wage earners are to be driven over en
masse into the republican party what hope has
the democratic party of electing a president espe
cially should the democratic candidate be Gov-
ernor Wilson who charges all labor with being in
the game?
The grrat majority of people earn their bread
in the sweat of their faces and it has been the
boast of all parties in American politics that they
held to policies that benefited such people aa the
surest way to make our civilization better than
that of the Old World and bold open the door
of hope to the humblest citizen. Few democrats
have gone so far in recent years as did Governor
Wilson in this New York speech. It might have
been well for him and his party had he stuck to
his original speech. His interpolation will need
explanation and even then it is difficult by cor-
rection or explanation to patch up this a- hasty
and foolish utterance.
EDITORIAL REFLECTIONS.
Even an aeroplane could hardly find a spot
firm enough to. start from or to alight on. Bryan
Eagle.
In the event of war everybody will want to en-
list if the "dallard-a-day" pension bill becomes a
law. Alice Echo.
Why is it the man with rheumatism is always
the man who wants to do the most work and
can't? Gonaales Inquirer.
Reyes at the advanced age of 74 got drunk on
ambition and reeled head foremost into a Mexi-
can dungeon. Sulphur Spring! Newt.
If you want to go joy riding in an auto now is
the time. You will not likely go fast enough to
imperil your life. McKinney Courier-Gat ette.
The latest variety of peach is called the "Gov-
ernor Colquitt." Now how would you like to be
a fruit tree agent trying to sell this peach in a
prohibition community? Pour States Press.
"The Transvaal uses $7000000 worth of high
explosives a year." In the heat of a close cam-
paign an ordinary Texas candidate duplicate the
Transvaal performance in twenty-four hours.
Corpus Chritti Caller.
Ma and the girls have had their inning and it
was a joyful harvest for them. Next Tuesday
the old man will have his turn at the bat Oh
my I the fouls he will have to his credit when
the entire score is presented. Gainesville Reg-
ister. Give Us a Rsst
(From thGeorfettmm Commercial.) T .7
" .Thedors Roosevelt and William J. Bryan will
be voted for as presidential nominees w the Ne
braska. (fc give us s resti 'i. .i'v-V""-
-r-' i v 1?.. : ; '. V
MaiMWaaAWWWWaMwawsai
Jusi yesterday the wind was S :
f. The eld world's clothes seemed ween sad thin
'And every wind went mrouga ' K' .
Ad nuwi the old world's bones to scht
- And pais to droop its mouth ; . . y -But
new a ripple's on the lakv V ' .
And wins are in the South.
This morn I heard a mocking bird. ;
IClinlt An m invmtl time. .
t
I almost seemed to catch a word
Once in awhile snd soon
I sang aa ou4 as ever what
The mocker did ; my. mouth -
Was curved in smiles and glad my lot
The winds were in the South.
When trouble comes your wsy and you
Have borne the battle'i brunt.
And winds are- cold and you are blue
And all your weapons blunt
And you are minded to give o'er
The fight with pala drooped mouth
Then may the north winds hush their roar
And winds blow from the South.
Then when the mocker hushed so long
Hops up onto a twig
And his soul blossoms into song.
Your troubles erst so big.
Will dwindle till they're little things.
Not worth a drooping mouth ;
There's gladness in the songs he sings
When winds are in the South.
AN INDICATION.
You say you think your ion is a natural bora
musician ? "
"I certainly do."
"Surely he is too young to attempt to play'"
"I admit that.;
"Then how do you know that he likes music?"
"He has smashed every phonograph record w
had in the house."
THAT TURKISH TOWEL DRESS.
He started for the bathroom.
It was Saturday I guess;
But his wife shrieked; "Hold on there you've got
My new bath-towel dress."
DRINKIN' WEATHER.
Men who must give
A reason why
They take a drink
Of rock and rye
Must like to hear '
The blizzard bin.
And see such weather
As this is;
Hut they'll be glad
When summer's here
And they have an
Excuse for beer.
ALMOST AS BAD.
"Did you hear about the awful affliction which
has befallen Mrs. Talktif?"
"Don't tell me she has lost her voice I"
"No her husband has lost his hearing."
SHOWED HE COULD COME BACK.
Kicheson confessed in spite
Of his attorney's rage ;
One wants to get back when one has
Once been on the front page.
COOKERY.
Some day there won't be wood enough
To make a paper bag
And all the paper nulls bow tough !
WiH straightway chew the rag.
Pittsburg Chrontcle-TalegrapK
When paper bags all disappear.
About we'll have to look.
For something in which wifey dear.
May try the beans to cook.
Youngttown Telegram.
Alas I Alas What shall we do
When up against that snag?
What flavor can we find to take
That of the paper bag?
Scronton Tribune-Rcpublkcn.
When paper bags have had their day.
And have gone out again
She will prepare the roasts and soups
In her kimono then.
1 1) n.
Every axe must have its helve
There's a rhyme for 191 a.
New York Sun.
Workingmen must dig and delve.
Maybe Teddy Taft can shelve
We shall see in rsiz Bottom Globe.
Belvs Lock-wood dear old Belv
Will she run in 101a?
CURED.
"My wife gave me something in my coffee that
cured me of drinking."
"My wife gave me something in a box that
cured me of smoking."
"Maybe it was the same atuff."
"I guess not It was cigars."
A WINGED WELLMAN.
Atwood says he'll cross the ocean
In a thirty-hour flight;
When he's done it we'll concede that
He has doled the dope out right.
HEALTH AND SAFETY.
The road to health says Dr. Wiley is by wa)
of the smooth-shaven face. And the bald head?
The doctor possesses elegant specimens of both.
Louisville Timet.
The bald head is the road to safety but the
doctor beng so recently married doesn't like to
say so.
TOO MUCH IS ENOUGH.
We'd like to have the weather man
To know we've done emr Christmas shopping
It' time he realized that this
Incessant downpoyr was a-stopping.
AND THEY'RE PAID FOR IT.
"I just shot a deer old man!"
"A dear old. man? That is inexcusable I You
ought at least be careful enough so that you f
wouldn't bit anything more important than S
guide." ' "!
WHEN IS A LIAR NOT A LIAR? Y
Richeson has lied so much
That now on 'fessing up he' bent
tir.i j 1 it 1 . 1. .t t. 1 f "
r rc ucrneu 11 we aont more uw aui
Believe that he i insocent.
THEY MIGHT.
WnHw if til r UrVamnl
At toe jute mtu wnera xney stop
Would not join an agitation
To secure an open shop?
N AS XODAS'NEW. ' '.
"H is always giving me advice."
is ug aavKU do dm given yvm muf wvi v.
T. ... T V ntalM aw mi U
evr trv r - . s V
Senator Root suggest that' a five-minute period 7
f ailMii tu kImwvmI In Pnsttatl anAalrina' fiMnla 'V
m MMMMufihiu nf tht Ana minnfwfltn iflniwHM
aan. ol win bchM .ArMtiu lad Eiului' i
Whai'a tha mlonal saw to tmif-JViJmHilH sour .
v
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The Houston Post. (Houston, Tex.), Vol. 27, Ed. 1 Tuesday, January 9, 1912, newspaper, January 9, 1912; Houston, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth605635/m1/6/?rotate=180: accessed July 16, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; .