The Carrollton Chronicle (Carrollton, Tex.), Vol. 32, No. 10, Ed. 1 Friday, January 17, 1936 Page: 3 of 4
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7
The Whole Story
It is said that an Arkansas
farmer who filed an applica
tion for a loan with the Fede
ral Land Bank at St. Louis
forwarded an abstract with
his application. The applica-
tion did not suit the govern ;
ment attorney, who asked for'
I* This a System?
>RRE5P0N
By HAL G. VERMES
ir« Si
WN
©McClure Newspaper Syndicate.
WNU Service.
'TME craziest system ever floured out
■t by » lunatic would look very good
Indeed to a dumb cluck like Mudder
further facts concerning the j McMork. For many yeara DOW bis old
*1,. standby for a lucky bet Is to crack
jwnetship of the property, k ( chunk on the hldtI wh0>e
'Bhe farmer was very much
displeased with the request
and wrote back as follows :
‘‘There are no records or
archivg* available which con
names has the same initial as the dame
he is racing after.
If Mudder is trying to team up with
a blond Ally whose moniker is Mary,
he favors all the bangtails whose name
begins with M; and If this dame’s handle
is Helen he bets on the nags whose name
starts with H. Mudder has this dopey
Idea ever since he was roaring after
a gal by the name of Zenobla back In
3923 when Zev copped everything in
sight at Belmont. It is practically use-
less to remark that since then this In-
itial business don’t make Mudder no
millionaire.
But I worked out a serious system re-
cently which was based on common
sense. A blind man could See It even
with both eyes shut. When I tried to ex-
plain It to the missus, which we been
hitched long enough that I ought to
know better, it happened this way.
“Well, dearie,” she says, seeing me
sitting at the desk and wetting my
hair plenty, “I suppose you are now
going to give birth to another practi
cally Infallible system."
“Yes,” I admits with pride. “This
world beating system is based on the
fact that hot favorites don’t win often
enough and when they do the odds
ain’t long enough to muke It pay. That
. . . Is why the slip snatchers find It easy
*Hpam acquired possession to stay In business. But dark horses
cenTthe title to the above de
scribed land any further back
than the United States govern-
ment.
“However, I believe from a
historical standpoint, I can en-
lighten you as to the title in
such a way that the objections
that you have pointed out will
be waiyed.
“Thji land was acquired by
the United States government
in J803 by purchase from
France under What we now re-
fer to as the Louisiana Pur-
chase.
“France acquired possession
of the land by conquest as the
result of a successful war with
Spain.
of theyland by virtue of the
- fact tjh’at a young man in her
seTvi'ce by: the name of Chris-
topher Columbus on the 12th
day of October, 1492, discover
ed it and claimed it for Spain.
“Columbus got his authority
for making the aforesaid voy-
age and discovery from Ferdi
nand and Isabella, the king and
<jueen of Spain.
“Ferdinand and Isabella got
their authority for sponsor-
ing the voyage from the Pope
of Home.
“Tljfi.fciiifi.of Rome got his
wrtfiority by virtue of the fact
fcat he said that he was the
f icar of Christ on Earth
Christ got hte authority by the
fact He was the Son of God
and God created the earth.”—
Springdale News.
Rev. L. B. I rone, pastor of the
Methodistchurch of this place, who
admitfy claims x>r brags about Ar-
8 being the srate of his nativ-
i responsible for this article
-ding the Chronicle.
Cooperation vs Socialism
Some critics of farm cooper-
atives have denounced them as
being socialistic. This criti-
cism, tho sincerely made, is the
result of misunderstanding of
what real cooperatives do and
how they are formed.
-Socialism, roughly defined,
involves governmental owner,
ship of productive resources.
Thus, a socialistic cooperative
would be one founded and fi-
nanced by public money, oper-
ated by. government agents,
with the government treasury
standing behind it to pay any
losses and to guarantee its
members a returh no matter
how incompetent they were
and no matter what conditions
were.
The real farm cooperatives,
by contrast with this, are ex-
cellent examples of private
iuitiative and enterprise. A
group of farmers will get to-
gether, figuring that they can
buy more cheaply in larger
quantities, or that they can
sell to better advantage thru
a strong central organization.
They put up their own money,
and take their own risks. If
there are profits, they divide
them. If there are losses they
absorb them.
This kind of cooperation is
not socialism, it is sound busi-
ness, based on sound econo-
mics. Cooperating farmers are
individualists, who use the
benefits that accrue from mass
action to better their indivi-
dual lots—Industrial News
Review.
_#_
If a parson really wants to sell the
little articles for which be has so use
he will advertise in the WANT-AD
Department of The Chronicle.
yet the nod frequent, and besides at
very Jhlcy prices. So all we got to do
to win us plenty dlnero Is to bet on
the dark horses."
“How can we tell,” asks the missus,
Just to make It difficult, “which Is the
dark horse?"
But my Idea Is so simple that I know
even she. will - see It. “That Is the
sweet part of it," I says. "We don’t
have to guess the sleepers. All we do
Is eliminate the favorites and all the
hides what ain’t copped recent; and
then we spread out our cherries on
the rest of the field. The odds, you
see, Is usually So long that we can
stand to lose on five or six tickets and
still make ourselves a very excellent
profit. Indeed.”
Then am I terrible surprised when
the missus does not start roaring as
usual but smiles very sweet and says
the system looks perfect and she Is
going to help me with It
“Yoo will have to do a lot of fast
figuring," she says, "so you can work
on last-minute odds. But as this Is
such a good thing I know you will let
the gang In on It and they can assist
you with the pencil pushing. There-
fore, I will take Harry, the Pinhead's
mlssns and Mudder McMork's latest
rave, aud we girls will rush the bets
to the feed box and put It down like
you boys say."
Well, when I explains the system to
the dopes and dames that night, they
see it Is so good that they are raring
to go. They turn over their entire
bank to the dames plus my total which
I don't have to give to the missus as
ahe has got It all the time.
Then Harry, the Pinhead, Beezer
Bertie, Mudder McMork and me, stays
up all night laying out the figuring
as we are planning to start the next
day when we will crack down our
cherries on every heat so we can win
ourselves several barrels of cherries
pronto.
And right off we prove that tills Is
a special super system without a doubt
because after the first day we have
only lost a little over four grand. Of
course, we know that It takes a little
time to shape up any higli-class con-
sistency system like we got and we are
not discouraged nohow. Even after
the third day when we have dropped
now nearly fifteen grand, I know that
onr figuring Is okay and we will soon
clean us up plenty.
However, seeing as how the dames
are In on this thing what with acting as
our runners and placing our bets, I tells
them that if they want to quit we will
do so If they Insist, even though we
know we have at last got a perfect
system. But It is very strange they
do not Insist and my missus says that
the ladles are la with us to the finish.
Of course that mokes us boys very
delighted to know that they are not
going to run out on us just when we
are about due to cash In on the dnrk
horses.
Then we gets the breaks like we ex-
pected and we starts to win now and
then. The dames brings us the dlnero
and we are all very happy indeed.
This goes on win and lose every day,
which, of course, our system takes care
oft and everything works out perfect
like we figured. The only trouble is
that we lose more than we win and we
are soon out a total of eighty grand,
which It pretty near all of It. And be-
fore I has time to correct the error In
fhe system, the ladles reports that we
are down to our shirts and they need
laundering.
"We hope,” the fillies says, “that
you boys have learned a lesson. And
we want you to promise that you will
stlek to your own regular handicap-
ping and lay off all crazy systems, at
least, for the rest of the season."
Well, tve swear to do like they say.
as we are cleaned anyhow, and got
nothing to lose. Which Just goes to
show It's plenty easier to
FARMERS BRANCH NEWS
i Mrs. Kate Echols is i P ik
Mand hospital suffeiing from a
foot infection.
G. L. Thompson and family
have moved to his father’s
place north of Carrollton.
Tiny Cox, daughter of Mr.
and Mrs. Bill Cox, is recovering
from pneumonia.
Eight of the Meth >dist Mis-
sionary society ladies from
here attended the Zone meet-
ing held at Irving Tuesday of
last week.
Ray Thompson of Amarillo
came home with Mr. and Mrs.
Leon Wills for a few days visit
last week.
I. D. Crain returned to Trin-
idad, Colo., Sunday of last
week.
The Baptist ladies are study-
ing a book entitled: “The Book
We Teach.” They1 meet on
Tuesday mornings at the
ehurch with Rev. C. W. Hud-
son as teacher.
Betty Jane Moore, daughter
of Mr. an a Mrs. Delbert Moore,
is at the Medical Arts hospital
in Dallas at this writing after
a tonsil operation, and having
hemorrhage trouble.
Clarence Cox is at home from
the Army camp in Ft. Sill,
Okla. Part of the C C camp
there is under quarantine for
meningitis.
Grandma Gossett is confined
to her home with an infection
on her foot caused from a
bruise. She was 80 years old
last week. The Methodist Mis-
sionary society presen (ed her
with gifts last Tuesday.
M. L. Ford and family and
Lpyd Cook and family spent
the weekend in Gladewater
with Mrs, Lena Carlton.
m
andjpJw
Humoi
NO CHANGE REPORTED
Peggy the Barber wants to can
for your personal appearance. Ge4
our hair cut and your shaves at
'eggy’8.
A boastful American was holding
fourth on the merits of his watch to
a number of uninterested clubmen. At
last one of the men decided he could
stand it no longer.
“That’s nothing,” he Interrupted. “I
dropped my watch Into the Thames a
year ago, and it’s been running ever
since.”
The American looked taken aback.
“What!” he exclaimed, “the same
watch ?”
The other rose and slowly moved to
the door.
“No,” he replied, “The Thames.”—
London Express.
Wasn't Listening
Mother — What are you reading
about, Tommy?
Tommy—I don’t know,
pother—Well, you were reading
aloud.
Tommy—Yes, hot I wasn’t listening.
—Pearson’s Weekly.
”Little fishy in the brook
Papa caught it with a hook
Mama fried it in a pan
Baby ate it like a man.”
What the Iceman Said
Boy—Daddy, if you give me 10 cents
I’ll tell you what the Iceman said to
mamma.
Dad (all excited)—0. K., son, here’s
your dime.
Boy—He said, "Do you want any Ice
today, lady?”
Fast Guy
“Your boy must be a phenomenally
fast runner. I noticed in the paper
that he burned up the track with his
speed. I suppose you saw him do it?”
“No,” said the athlete’s mother, “but
I saw the track this mornihg and there
was nothing but cinders there.”
AND HE KNOWS
Why We Need
a National Umpire
By RAYMOND PITCAIRN
National Chairman *
—Sentineli at the Republic
tails than blonds, for the minute we
makes the serious promise, the ladles
confesses that they beep carrying the
dlnero In their upholstery all the time
aud they hadn't bet a dime!
I
As happened after the crash of the
Blue Eagle, the recent decision invali-
dating A. A. A has aroused various pro-
posals for a change in our Amerioan
form of government.
A typical suggestion is that we with-
draw from the Supreme Court some or
all of its authority to hold elected
officials to the course mapped out for
them In the Federal Constitution, and
thereby extend to Congress the power
to steer our ship of state among what-
ever shoals or channels may strike its
fancy.
There Is nothing either new or im-
possible about such proposals. They
can be translated into reality by the
mere adoption of any one of several
amendments now pending in Washing-
ton. Let the American people agree to
relinquish to Congress certain rights
granted them by the Constitution and
preserved by the Supreme Court-and
the thing is accomplished.
That’s what advocates of those amend-
ments are asking us to do.
But, simple as this idea can be made
to sound, it remains a serious and
dangerous proposal. It strikes at the
very root of accepted American prin-
ciples In government. Before we con-
sider any such course let’s pause to
remind ourselves of several facts of our
past and current history. Let’s recall,
for example:
That alone, among the greater na-
tions of earth, our country has retained
its form of government unchanged dur-
ing the past century.
That much of the permanence and
success of its government has been
attributed to the system of checks and
balances between executive, judicial and
legislative branches, and between the
States and Washington. It is based on
the principle that the right of the
people and the states to govern them-
selves shall not be usurped by central
authority.
That under our form of government
America has enjoyed a larger share of
happiness and prosperity than any
other nation.
That none of the nations which in
recent years have shifted to the newer
forms now popular in Europe have
achieved anything that can be envied
by the American people.
And finally: ^
That whatever passing benefits vari-
ous odd experiments may offer a
favored few, they do not hold the
solution of our problems. Despite the
alluring phrases of economic crooners,
America still subscribes to the essential
truth and wisdom expressed by George
Washington when he said:
’’Nothing but harmony, honesty. In-
dustry and frugality are necessary to
figure lmng- ! mal!e 1,5 a vreat and happy petiole ”
“Mr. Arts told uie my face was
classic. What is classic?’’
“Oh, most anything old."
Too Much Change in Hours
A farmer had been visiting relatives
In the city, but was glad to get back
home.
“Don’t you enjoy city life?" a neigh-
bor asked him.
“Oh, it wouldn’t be so bad I guess.
If I could get used to going to bed at
my usual getting up time."
Question of Pull
Old Sailor—Yes, mum, that’s s uan
o'war.
Lady—How Interesting! What Is
that little one just in front?
“Oh, that’s Just a tug.”
“Oh, yes, of course, tug-of-war. I’ve
heard of them."
Gob Humor
Coxswain—I hear that Sadie is se-
cretly married to a fireman on the
Detroit
Seaman—Oh, he knows It all right.
—U, S. S. Saratoga Plain Talk.
Out You Go
Landlady—I’ll give yon Just three
days la which to pay your board.
Student—All right I’ll pick the
Fourth of July, Christmas and Easter.
—Pathfinder Magazine.
PIFFLE!
"Why didn’t you marry that girl?”
"Another woman came between us.”
“Huh."
“Just as I started to propose the
telephone girl cut me off!”
Where’s the Binocular*?
The Wife—Shall we ask Mr. Snookos
to our bridge party, dear? He plays
quite a fair game, doesn’t he?
The Husband—Oh, yes, quite fair—
If you watch him.
If the Home Town New-papei
>rth anything to Carrollton ar
‘alias county it is worth a subset:
lion.
I
How’m I Doing?
Traffic Cop—Don’t you know you
can't turn around in the middle of the
block?
Woman—Oh, I think I can make it
Thank you so much.
MODERN WAYS
of Cooking Fish
•nECAUSE the baby in the
O Mother Goose rhyme was man
enough to eat it is no reason for
mothers to go on and on frying
fish. There are other more health-
ful and delicious ways of prepar-
ing them, highly recommended,
unless you happen to be a connois-
seur of the art of frying—which
so few of us are.
Even broiling and baking fish
should be done with a knowledge
of the kind of fish to be used, and
the best way of broiling or baking
it. Dry-meated fish, such as cod,
haddock, pollack, and hake, are
better adapted for boiling, steam-
ing, stewing or making into a cur-
ried dish, for they will keep their
shape and not fall to pieces in the
process of cooking. Oily-meated
fish, such as salmon, shad,
mackerel, herring, lake trout and
whitefish, are preferable for quick
modes of cooking, by the hot oven
method.
Don’t Overcook Flab
It is well to remember that fish,
in general, do not require the slow
cooking used for many varieties of
meat because its connective tissue
Is more tender than meat tissue,
and overcooking extracts the
juices and dries out the fish.
Canners have done extensive re-
search into the proper methods of
cooking fish, with the result that
housewives order certain fish in
cans because they realize that
home-cooking cannot equal the
perfection with which they are
cooked.
Canned salmon is a striking ex-
ample of this. More salmon is
sold in cans than any other fish.
While it is possible to broil or
bake salmon very nicely, few peo-
ple, other than famous hotel and
restaurant chefs, have ever
achieved near perfection in doing
so. Canned salmon, on the other
hand, comes to us always lovely
in color, tender, juicy, its oils well
blended into the salmon texture.
Housewives, therefore, have given
their time and thought to the
many ways to serve salmon.
The following salad and souffld
provide a new and delightful addi*
tion to the ever-lengtheding list of
good salmon dishes.
Nice for Parties
Metropolitan Salmon Salad:
Chill the contents of one 7-oimce
can of salmon. Open and put the
salmon in a small bowl lined with
crisp lettuce, being careful not to
break up the fish. Mix one-fourth
cup mayonnaise with one . table-:
spoon thick sweet or sour cream, .
one teaspoon vinegar, one table-,
spoon chopped celery, one table-
spoon chopped pimiento, one1 tea-
spoon capers and one teaspoon rel-
ish. Spread over the salmon. This'
serves three persons.
Salmon Souffld: Turn the con- ,
tents of one 10%,-ounee: can of
strained cereal into a double boiler
and heat. Then add the contents
of one 1-pound can of salmon
which has been flaked, and three
tablespoons of butter. Add the.
beaten yolks of three eggs and salt
to taste. Fold in the three stiffly-
beaten egg whites and pour into a
buttered baking dish. Bake in a
moderate oven, 350 degrees, for
thirty to thirty-five minutes. Serve
at once. Serves eight persons.*.
New
TO SAVE FUEL
n. n
T^EXT to taking a lease on the
li garden of Eden, the house-
wife’s dream is a place tc live
where there would be no regular
monthly bills coming in. Food
bills one doesn’t feel badly about
—that was a gorgeous roast Sun-
day, and that Friday fish was
well worth what it cost. Cloth-
ing — well, everyone likes new
clothes, and you expect to pay
for them. But gas bills, light
bills, laundry bills — how lucky
Eve was, except that she had to
go to bed at sundown.
Why not save a bit on your
cooking fuel this winter, whether
it happens to be gas, electric, coal
or oil? Make a list of the canned
meats which your family like best
and plan to serve them often this
winter. Besides the fact that you
don’t pay for bones which you
throw away, you pay for only a
minute or two in heating them,
and if you have some good recipes
on hand, you will be surprised to
find what delicious meat dishes
you can make.
All Kinds and All Prices
These meats range from the
very inexpensive corned beef—
solid, tender and delicious—to
such good Sunday dinrier meats as
baked ham or baked chicken in
cans. You would boil, or bake,
half of a ham for at least two
hours, and by the time the skin
and bone were removed you would
have no more ham than you can
buy in the large-size can, ready-
cooked, at less cost per pound.
Then deduct the two-hours of fuel
burning—and what have you? A
darn good ham.
Here are some good meat dishes.
Beef and Mushroom Pie: Drain
and reserve the liquor from a 4-
ounce can of mushrooms. Slice the
hiushrooms and saut6 for five min-
utes in three tablespoons of but-
ter. Add enough water to the
musiiroom liquor to make two and
one-fourth cups of liquid. Smooth
three tablespoons flour to a paste
with the liquid, add slowly to the
butter and mushrooms and cook
until creamy. Add one bouillon
cube, one and one-half teaspoons
salt, one and one-half cups of
small potato balls or cubes and
the contents of one 12-ounce can
of roast beef which has been cut
in cubes. Pour into a baking dish,
cover with a crust or with small
baking powder biscuits and bak4
in a hot oven—400 degrees—for
thirty-five to forty-five minutes.
This serves eight persons.
Creamed Meats
Southern Creamed Chicken and
Corn: Slice the mushrooms from
a 4-ounce can of mushrooms from
which the liquor has been drained
and reserved. Cook mushrooms
with one-half cup chopped
blanched almonds in three table-
spoons butter for five minutes, be
ing careful not to brown. Add
three tablespoons flour and stir
until smooth. Add slowly the
mushroom liquor and two cups
milk, stirring constantly until
Rmooth and creamy. Add salt and
pepper to taste, one cup canned
corn, one 6-ounce can of chicken
which has been cut up, and one
slightly-beaten egg yolk. Have
mixture very hot. This serves
eight persons.
French Omelet with Creamed
Ham Loaf: Melt two tablespoons
butter, add two tablespoons flour
and stir until smooth. Add one
and one-third cups milk slowly,
stirring constantly until smooth
and creamy. Season with salt and
pepper to taste and add two tea-
spoons lemon juice. Cut the con-
tents of a 7-ounce can of ham loaf
in small dice and add with one-
half cup diced celery and one
fourth cup sliced stuffed olives.
Reheat and serve around a rolled
French omelet made in the usual
way. This serves four persons.*
\
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Martin, W. L. The Carrollton Chronicle (Carrollton, Tex.), Vol. 32, No. 10, Ed. 1 Friday, January 17, 1936, newspaper, January 17, 1936; (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth728315/m1/3/: accessed July 10, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Carrollton Public Library.