James Martin's Comic Advertiser (Austin, Tex.), Vol. 1, No. 3, Ed. 1, Tuesday, September 1, 1874 Page: 2 of 2
This newspaper is part of the collection entitled: Texas Digital Newspaper Program and was provided to The Portal to Texas History by the The Dolph Briscoe Center for American History.
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THE COMIC ADVERTISER.
TH3 COMIC ADVERTISES.
PUBLISHED GRATUITOUSLY BY
jambs jLJRrrxisr
Austin. Texas.
JOE. ItlAIlTKN.
EDITOR.
X KKMe).
Ontt Cop'i one rear $00.00
Two Cophu " OO.OO
If you don't like these tonus wond us a loud orPlno
Know for your back pay and stop your subscription
at once.
N.B. No advertising snnco to soil. Wo have taken
all or that In order to "show up" oursplendldstoi-k
Wo refused 876000000000 from IlEI-MliOLD for one
column (or should If ho had ollored 11.)
WSINGLE COPIES FilEE.-"
Tako one and ulier you have read ll hand It to your
afflicted neighbor.
GREETING.
Onco upon a time as the story books suy there
was u man (this assertion nmy be startling but
wo vouch for its truth) tliiH man hud a name his
name was given to him by his father or mother
or aunt or some other friend or relative and for
want of a better one it wus Benjamin and his
pilcrnal ancestor's nume was Franklin he was
ever after called Benjamin Franklin ; Ben for
short by those that were familiar with him.
Having given you an outline of Ins early history
we will proceed to tell you what he did : he said
something; yes fellow citizen he saidsomething
and unlike the sayings of our illustrious Presi-
dent it was something worthy of record so let it
be recorded in the Comic Advertiser; but before
we divulge this truly remurkable saying wc de-
sire to impress you gentle reader with the fuel
that this saying was not a hasty saying such as
men are apt to launch into the world for the
benifit of whom it may concern when somebody
spits on their newly polished broganR or when
they are disturbed in their evening siesta by a
gentle request from the Bharers of their hash that
they will hold the baby for awhile no reader it
was no such saying it was one fraught with wis-
dom yea one worthy of Solomon himself who
you Know wns a very wise kind of a man in his
days this remarkable saying as recorded by his-
torians reads thus "A Penny Saved is a Penny
Made." Doubtless you havo heard this before
if you have it won't hurt you to hear it again
and again until you are in the proper spirit to
Erofit by it. Now Benjamin when ho said it
ad been through the mill and knew exactly how
it was himself consequently we that havn't
should listen to his words. Having instructed
you thuR far in the mysteries of the order (as
the Grangers say) we will proceed further and
tell you to make a practical UBe of Ben's exper-
ience. Whn Ben was alive he always bought
hie goods at our store that is after he was old
enough to know his business and if you are as-
wise hs he was you will come and do likewise
ifyounre nut us wise ns lie win come and do
likewise any how and you soon will be. Wi
huve a fine line of New Goods and at such
pries that you have splendid opportunities ol
saving the ponce and such a cleik ladies by all
mpans cull arid see our clerk it will repay you
for all the toils and troubles of life to bee ou
clerk and let him sell you something by all
means come and see our clerk and die happy.
Jas. Martin
Congress Avenue
AUSTIN TEXAS
BOOT AND SHOE
MANUFACTURER.
ALL KINDS OF
Ladies' and Children's Work
Of the very best quality con-
stantly on hand;
Particular attention paid to
Country Orders.
Many heads are botter than one
though too many cooks rpoil the brotb.
Another argument in favor of the Cash System
(it takes lev men to run a business).
ifp;vE have JSvwS?
COMPETITJpJ
He that would live in peace and rest
must hear and see and buy the best.
We have it and enough for all.
A citizen of a country town noted for his dis-
honesty was lately taken very ill and becom-
ing alarmed sent for a clergyman who came to
see him and laid down the divine law to him
with great faithfulness and emphasis. The sick
man was much affected and said "well parson
I think you're right and I've made up my mind
i hat if I get well I shall in the future live prin-
cipally honest."
Experience is a good schoolmaster
but charges very high wages. We charge
nothing for looking at our Stock and giving prices.
Organizing a Grange.
BY 1HK FAT CONTKHUTOR.
The epidemic has at length reached our quiet
litll village and the people are crazy to become
grangers. A haHy farmer in the neigh bor-
uood name up ho other night and made a Ptirnng
speech retarding the Patrons of Husbandry ns
the order tB cal'ed of which he claimed to be a
prominent officer and after the speech steps
tvere taken toward the organization of a grange.
Only one tanner was present others who came
not being able to eain admission as the hall was
crowded b fore they arrived Hut that isn't
very material in a grange 1 am told.
The horny-handed farmer was made chairman
of the meeting and after peveral stirring speech-
es had been made on subjects more or less re-
mote from agriculture persons who desired to
enroll themselves as grangers were invited to
step forward. There was a great rush for the
tand when a woman's shrill voice cried( "Hold! '
Elbowing Ver way to the front she claimed the
right to be enrolled first.
"What have you done" asked the chairman.
-omewhat sternly "entitling you to( be enrolled
among the 'PationB of Husbandry V "
"llai-ed'leven daughters" was the proud re-
ply. "AH got husbands and if I ain't a 'patron
t husbandry' I should like to know who is."
She was received at once with cheers.
A carpenter claimed to be something of a
farmer. Said he .had worked around a
farm a good deal built fences around it. He
had got in a lot of hy too got in out of the
rain. He added that if there was no special ob-
ection to his joining the grange he would like to
hecomc ther carpenter and join 'er. He was al
lowed to join.
A lawyer jumped upon a chair and exclaimed
vociferously : "Mr. Chairman I claim admission
no ibis noble order 1 too have held the
"Held it on an attachment" put in the solita
Buy Jas. Martins Custom-Made
READ THIS.
1 wish to call the attention of the citizens
of Austin and vicinity to the following facts:
My manufacturing department is conducted
under my own special supervision ; I em
ploy none but the best and most experienced!
workmen and not "a pair of Boots or Shoes
leaves my establishment without first being
thoroughly examined by myself; consequent-
ly I am enabled to furnish my customers
BETTER WORK and at LOWER RATES
than any other house in the South or West.
My Sales Work is also selected with great:
care. All I ask is one trial to convince the.
most sceptical.
Every Pair Warranted as Hep- I1J IB i
resented and Satisfaction mWMmlMWmM
G aarantee din all cases. jtSKUKilm
CALLMD m HHn
SHOWGOflfs ! lfcliW
A. few good reasons why you
should buy your Hoots and
Shoes of Jas Martin
He deals exclusively in Boots and Shoes.
He has all his work made by the best
manufacturers.
He is a practical mechanic and cannot
be deceived in Boots and Shoes or leather.
He superintends the manufacturing de-
partment himself and gives general satis-
faction to persons ordering goods.
He has not groceries dry goods and
notions mixed up with his Slices.
He buys for cabh and therefore can
i sell cheaper and better goods than parties
ignorant of the business.
Take hoed of other men's example
and ooma in and ask our prioos.
The chairman remarked sarcastically that if
tbey krpt on at that rate they could easily trans-
pose the trrance into a first clsF9 retreat for
lunatics mid run the Asylum clear out of the"!
State. lie added that he had organized granges ' i
among 'armers in our most populom cities but
never had he oncMintereil such pitiful ignorance
regarding the farm as he found here. He hop d
they would henceforth confine themselves strictly
to the business in hand.
Atailnr wanted to join on the streneth of his
'sowing' and an artist because he had drawn
saw logs drawn them with a crayon.
A father of a large family cluimed distinction
on account ol the years he had d'votcu to era- ll
dling and a preacher bjcause of the effective f
manner in wmen ne uau naniuea me ax oi uie
apostles.
Enough names being at length enrolled the
question of the election of oifi ers was next in
cider. The chairman in looking about for
chief officer asked who had raised tli i most
during the past year. A man in the poultry
business said when it come to chickens he
guessed he had raised about as good crops as
anybody. A rebellious schoolboy who had
thrashed his teacher recently said he raised old
Linenduster clear out of his pumps and a female
crusader allowed the tavern keepers whisky had
raised more disturbances than anything else.
The solitary farmer who had had very lit:le to
say remarked very solemnly that the man who
was entitled above all others to be chief officer
so far asraieing was concerned was now unfor-
tunately serving a teim in State Prison under
dious and oppretsive laws enacted to put down
the farmer
Well change all that said the horny handed
tarmer but what dm he raise (
He raised a one dollar note to a ten !
'Hub nearly broke the meeting the crowd
roaring and the boss granger Hying into a tower-
ing rage. He declared he didnt believe there was
i drop of agricultural blood in the whole lot. He
added wiik biting sarcasm few agricultural ed-
iiors have exhibited such contemptib'e ignorance
vith regard to the farm as t ey had shown at
his meeting. He doubted whether any individ-
tal present could explain the use of the straw-
cutter in sub-soil grafting or calculate how
many gridirons it was necessary to plant in order
.o raise an acre of buckwheat With this he
mton hisoercoat and left the hall and was
een no more. We have since learned that he
vasn't a granger at all but a base fraud who
oes about imposing upon simple villagers. But
le didn't make much out of us as the doorkeep-
r ran away with the box receipts onedollar and
10 sense but then there was no cense in the
neeting.
It is hard to please everybody but wo
hink it can be done and are determined to try
ind please all who may favor us with a call.
ry Tarmer sitting by and the lawyer subside
amid the laughter ot the crowd.
There wa- a commotion at the door and t'
villm dressmaker a very energetic woman
forced her way into the hall.
"Put me down as a grangeress 1" she cried
'for I am the champion mower.
"Mower!" shouted the assembly in on.
breath. .
Yes mower. Don't my customers admit thai
I have mode ahead of anybody ?
She was admitted but the chair decided the
could stand no mower of that sort. She war
elected Flora and ib ready to Flora man whi
denies her right to the honor.
Uy the way how singular it is that farmer
are eo esger to buy a reaper and mower althougl
it notoriously goes agaipst the grain. It woulo
seem as though a reaper was sufficient. But J
once knew a man to purchase a washer aw
wringer for hiu wife because as be profanely re-
marked he not only wanted a machine to washei
but to wring her d neck off
A wag asked the attintion of the meeting
while lie read the moving poem Little Breeches
What has Little Breeches got to do with farm-
ing? asked the bos granger rather testily.
Didn't it make Hay ? replied the wag.
The wretch was let oft as it was evident hi
bad the Hay fever.
Uncle Billy ought to kuyv he's been down to see.
ste
M
Young gentlemen who have wedding presents
to make this month will be interested in know-
ng that alligators can be bought at Perry Geor-
gia just now for a dollar apiece.
If you trust before you try you may
epent before you die. Tried it and lost
noney by it hence our determination to sell for
Cash.
Jenkins thinks tuis is the best w 10 go shop-
ping always bring your family fo then every
one can get what they want and your wife will
never complain that you paid too much or got
something she did not want.
Sensible man that Jenkins fay we.
A little neglect may breed great mis-
ohiefi So come and see our stock before pur-
chasing elsewhere.
All
J.r:
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James Martin's Comic Advertiser (Austin, Tex.), Vol. 1, No. 3, Ed. 1, Tuesday, September 1, 1874, newspaper, September 1, 1874; Austin, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth78338/m1/2/?q=%22%22~1: accessed July 16, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting The Dolph Briscoe Center for American History.