Sulphur Springs News-Telegram (Sulphur Springs, Tex.), Vol. 102, No. 159, Ed. 1 Sunday, July 6, 1980 Page: 4 of 32
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'*4—SECTION 1 —THE NEWS-TELEGRAM, Sulphur Spring*, T»xo», Sunday, July 4,1*80.
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!
At Wit's
~Z0tl
1 - * w
By Erma Bombeck ^
3lSi-
I2&20
t
From reality to fantasy
Okay, America, this is the time to play it cool.
;* A few dozen teenagers have gotten burr haircuts. It
> doesn’t mean we’re into a hair rcession, but we all
; have a shot at having our young people look like our
> high school graduation pictures if we just keep our
; heads.
: I cannot caution you enough on what a sensitive and
-.crucial time this is. You probably think I’m over-
• reacting, but if one — just one - parent gets a burr
: haircut, it’s all over. We’ve blown it.
I For centuries young people have tried desperately
i to get a “look” that is tneir own. Every time they do,
\ their parents come along and imitate it and young
: people move on to something else.
!1 They loved miniskirts, loud music, tinted glasses,
; gold chains around the neck, causes, marches,
.relationships, meaningful conversations, tight jeans,
;i‘tape decks and frizzy hair until their parents
$ discoveremthem too and their popularity began to
wane.
I never knew what solitude was until I poked my
;• head into my son’s bedroom one day when nis stereo
i was going 86 decibels and shouted, “Could you turn it
*: up? I can’t hear all the words in the kitchen.” From
• then on, his music became private.
For parents who yearhto see their son’s ears once
; ydU
Help for battered teens
-. more, may I sii
yew pick out a boy in the
suggest
: neighborhood who has a ponytail down his back and
: say to your son, “Why can’t you let your hair gfow
: like George? It’s neat caught up in a rubber band
: instead of sticking up in the air like a porcupine in
T heat!”
Tell him it’s his “patriotic duty” to keep his hair
•: long like George Washington. Tell him he can’t go
: visiting with you until he lets his hair grow as you’re
ashamed of him.
•' Tell him he looks like his sister with short hair and
; not to be surprised if the coach tells him to let his hair
: grow before he can play football.
: Nag at him for not using enough shampoo and
* water. (“How can your hair be clean if you use only
one towel to dry it? ” Remind him of the good old days
: when his hair used to clog the drains every two weeks
* or so.
■ But mostly, what we all must do is to let our hair
: grow. Remember, the longer ours becomes ... the
- Shorter theirs will become.
* I know I’m asking a lot. It’s going tg, be a long, hot
: summer, but we can do it, parents. For America!
■Copyright 1H0, Fiold Enterprises, Inc.
By ROBERT
WALLACE, Ed.D.
Copley News Service
A recent Surgeon Gener-
al’s report estimates that as
many as 4 miUlon children
are either abused or serious-
ly neglected by their par-
ents.
A common misconception
about abuse is that it in-
volves just babies, but, in
fact, it’s inflicted on chil-
dren of all ages. Of the total
cases reported in 1977, 28
percent involved teen-agers.
In the past, child abuse
generally was not reported
or even recognized as a so-
cial ailment. But today,
more teens than ever are
crying out for help — to
police, social agencies, hos-.
pilals, clinics and local
child-protection units set up
across the country. By stop-
ping abuse as soon as it
starts, thousands of young
people may be saved from
irreparable physical and
psychological harm.
According to Dr. Vincent1
Fontana, chairman of the
Mayor’s Task Force on
Child Abuse and Neglect in
New York, reports indicate
that both the rich and poor,
the educated and the igno-
rant beat their children, In-
jure them and neglect them.
'.‘It can be the frustration of
unemployment that makes a
parent strike out against a
child, or it can be too many
martinis, stockmarket prob-
lems, waiting on gas lines or
an Impending divorce,” he
says. "No age, racial or in-
come group is immune to
it.”
Emotional abuse and ne-
glect, less dramatic than
physical assault, are, in
fact, equally damaging.
Says Fontana, “Psychologi-
cal or verbal absue can be
just as insidious as bodily
harm. The parent has ‘no
time’ for the child, says,
‘Get away from me,’ or
sends the, child to boarding
schools to be relieved of the
responsibility of child rear-
ing. It's natural for a young
person in this situation to
grow up feeling unwanted
And it’s as hurtful as if/
you'd broken his or^Mr
arm.” ......
There are many reasons
why abused teens fail to
seek help. They may not
know where to go. They are
afraid to speak up for fear of
repercussions to themselves
or other members of their
families. Or they may feel
that their parents are basi- •
cally good people, who only
become violent under cer-
tain circumstances.
But more and more peo-
ple are realizing that report-
ing a problem benefits ev-
eryone involved. Mistreated
teens can be spared perma- *
nent emotional and physical
scars, and abusive parents
can get badly needed coun-
seling.
HOW TO GET HELP
To report a child'or teen-
abuse problem, look up your
state or city government in
the phone book. Under the
heading "Social Services,”
you’ll find the numbers for
child-abuse reporting cen-
ters. Many cities and states
also list special counseling
centers, set up to help young
people. Or you may feel
more comfortable discuss-
ing the problem with some-
one you know and trust — a
physician, school counselor,
teacher or minister.
In an emergency, you can
call a crisis-intervention
line, often listed under
"Clinics” or "Mental
Health” In the Yellow
Pages. Crisis lines offer im-
mediate, short-term help.
They're staffed by personnel
who will listen, offer ice,
and, if necessary, direct you
to long-tqrm Counseling
agencies. *
If abuse is physical, don’t
hesitate, to call the police
and ask" for the juvenile offi-
cer-.-This doesn't mean that
your parent will be arrested
and go to jail, it means
you’ll get help. For immedi-
ate medical aid, get to the
emergency ward at a local
hospital. ,
DEAR DR. BLAKER
When I read your recent
column about the married
woman who became obsessed
with the man she met briefly
in the park, I agreed with your
advice that she try to visual-
ize the difference between her
fantasy of that relationship
and the reality of her
marriage.
As you indicated, she might
in that way find out what is
missing from her relationship
with her husband. /
It reminded me of a game
invented by Fritz Peris, the
founder of Gestalt therapy. In
any boring, exasperating'..or
frightening situation, try this
exercise:
Close your eyes and take an
imaginary trip to a place
where you feel secure and
happy. Come back to the here
and now. --
Compare the two situations
Was "there" preferable?
Why?
Practice shuttling back and
forth between “there” and
"here” until you feel more
comfortable in the present.
Very often, the “there” situ-
ation will give you a clue
about what is missing in the
‘‘now.’’. The difference
between the two can help you
begin to identify the changes
you may want to make in your
life.
As a long-range goal, Peris
suggests trying to make your
real life more like your fanta-
sy-
DEAR READER - I have
used this exercise often and
find it particularly helpful for
people who are chronically
treating her like a child.
But when I let things go and
don’t discuss her problem, she
accuses me of not caring
about what happens to her.
What should I do?
DEAR READER - Your
daughter seems to be caught
between wanting to be
mothered and feeling guilty
and inadequate because of
those dependency needs
Why not simply ask her how
you can help?
By asking her to define
what she needs, you are let-
ting her know you see her as
an adult who can ask for help.
And you are gently reminding
her that you are there when
she needs a little mothering.
This approach means that
yea will have to stay out of
out & about
CHOICES
Karen Blaker Ph.D.
A babysitting clinic will be
held at the end of the month.
Anyone who would like a friend
or relative between the ages of
12-18 to participate should call
the County Extension service
and give them the name and
address. The number to call is
885-3443.
A beginning cake decorating
course will begin July 17,
through the county extension
service. The course will run
once a week for six weeks.
Those wishing to enroll in the
course must call the extension
office, 885-3443, before July 11.
r*
C
V
g
r
?
i
Hot flashes are a symptom
DEAR DR. LAMB - Will
you kindly discuss hot flashes
In one of your ct
my periods stopped 1 had per-
our columns? After
haps 12 a day for about a year
and then they practically
r stopped for about a year and
now I have them again about
r one every hour. I know some
,♦ doctors prescribe a hormone
* medicine to lessen them. But
£ I'm reluctant to take
; hormones. I feel they might
cause more harm than good,
f DEAR READER - Hot
•»! flashes are one of the most
annoying symptoms of the
menopause. You might be
5 surprised
y
mpti
$>u
I to know that people
have hot flashes that are not
caused by the menopause, too.
This includes men.
We ail have a temperature
regulating center in the floor
of the brain. When the body
needs to lose heat, this mecha-
nism sends signals through the
nervous system to increase
the blood flow in the skin.
That's why some people have
a flushed appearance at the
same time they’re having a
hot flash. It also induces
sweating which is a means of
producing evaporative cool-
ing All these mechanisms are
useful when the body needs to
lose heat, but when the heat
loss mechanism goes berserk
as with hot flashes caused by
the menopause, It can be
rather disconcerting.
We don’t really know why
the temperature regulating
center gets out of adjustment
but it seems to have some-
thing to do with the pulsating
release of hormones which
comes and goes and may be
some compensating mecha^
nism for the loss of female
hormones normally produced
by the ovaries. Periodic
release of adrenaline may be
a factor and that’s one of the
reasons why some doctors
now use Inderai to help con-
trol hot flashes. Apparently
this is useful in some people.
When the hot flashes are
caused by the menopause, a
small amount of female hor-
mones often helps relieve
them. The amount required is
often below the level that
could be a significant factor
in increasing the risk of ute-
rine cancer.
(NEWSPAPER ENTERPRISE ASSN)
■
HEALTH
Lawrence E. Lamb, M.D.
Stop Sign.
:
*
l
I
I
I
It’s a fact that more than 9 out of every
10 people looking for a home recognize the
familiar brown and gold £ENTURY 21* sign,
it Is so widely recognized that every day over
1,600 homes are sold by CENTURY 21 people
from coast to coast. In 1979 alone, that
resulted In a staggering 579.000 closings.
Wouldn’t you rather list your house with
the organization that more people have put
their trust In?
Just call your CENTURY 21 Neighborhood
Professional"!
And let our stop
^1^ sign start working
fory°u
HUIIUjl ’ At CENTURY 21/
yyf 1\ We ll Give Our
IrTU 111 » Word To You7
Re-Mac and Associates
101,1 Gilmer
885-2161 -
Well give our word toyou.
(1980 Century 2t Real Estate Corporation ^Registered Trademark ol
Century 2t Real Estate Corporation. Printed In U S A
Each office Is Independently owned and operated.
Equal Housing Opportunity gj
We’ve got
the money you need.
Easy monthly payments.
Everybody needs a good neighbor!
FBOPLBH
NATIONAL BANK
a mi ■ ol Sulphur Springs
JfoV the bank that s eager to serve you1
Member
FDIC
Insured To , ■ ■
tiooooooo Hburnextdoor neighbor.
Those interested in helping
Sulphur Springs get an outreach
clinic should write to Luis M.
Cowley, M.D., Terrell State
Hospital, P.O. Box 70, Terrell,
Tex. 75160. Those hoping to see
such a clinic located in Hopkins
County stress that letters are
the only way interest can be
calculated. The more letters
received by Cowley, the bigger
the possibility of the outreach
clinic being brought here.
Another free Red Cross
beginners class will start July
14 at the City Pool for people
from six to sixteen years of age.
Everyone should be at the pool
at 9 a.m. Registration will be on
a first come, first serve basis
only. Come early to register,
because the class will be limited
to the first 70 students.
The City Pool would like to
extend an apology to everyone
who was unable to register for
swimming lessons, Monday,
June 30.
Admitted
Orbie Albro, 1441 College.
Christy Ragsdale, Winnsboro.
Mrs. Nicki Penson, Route 2.
Dismissed
Mrs. Glenn Bell, 1716 Hodge.
William Nabors, 946 Jef-
ferson. '■
Eddie Hill, 119 N. Moore.
Mrs. Howard Foster, Route 5.
Mrs. Alonzo Sosa, Campbell.
Mrs. Bob Folmar and baby
son, Winnsboro.
Louie Coker, Route 2.
Mrs. Robert Kirkpatrick, 445
S. Locust.
dissatisfied with life. After
all, it is impossible to move
forward when you have no
sense of direction.
Thank you for making the
game available to my read-
ers,
DEAR DR. BLAKER -
Our daughter graduated from
high school this June and has
been looking for a job ever
since. Under the pressure of
this emotion-packed situation,
our relationship has fallen
apart.
No matter what 1 do, it is
wrong.
When I try to help her by
talking to people in stores
about possible positions or by
bringing home job applica-
tions, she criticizes me for
/>
your daughter’s life except for
the times when she asks you
to come in. You may find this
difficult if you are used to
defining your worth as a per-
son by your contribution to
your daughter’s welfare.
Depressed? Write for Dr.
Blaker’s “Fighting Depres-
sion” hotline. Send 50 cents
plus a stamped, self-
addressed envelope to Dr.
Blaker in care of this newspa-
per, P.O. Box 475, Radio City
Station, New York, NY 10019.
Send your questions to Dr.
Blaker at the above address.
Volume of mail prohibits per-
sonal replies, but questions of
general interest will be dis-
cussed in future columns.
(NEWSPAPER ENTERPRISE ASSN)
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consumer
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Keys, Clarke. Sulphur Springs News-Telegram (Sulphur Springs, Tex.), Vol. 102, No. 159, Ed. 1 Sunday, July 6, 1980, newspaper, July 6, 1980; Sulphur Springs, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth824727/m1/4/: accessed July 18, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Hopkins County Genealogical Society.