The Lampasas Daily Leader (Lampasas, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 181, Ed. 1 Tuesday, October 4, 1932 Page: 3 of 4
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THE LAMPASAS LEADER
Fable of Revising
and Reforming
Football
88
By GEORGE ADE
t©, P.eil Syndicate.)—WNU Service.
"T T CAME about that many Colleges
awoke to Life in the Fall and
I loud Yelps echoed up and down the
leafy Streets which had been som-
nolent since June. Local Cops began
to wear worried Looks. The dealer in
Hot Dogs bought a new set of Tires
for his Smoke-Wagon. Every College
widow put away her light Summer
Reading and started in to take Set-
ting-Up Exercises in Prospect of an-
other long Season of clinching and
wrassling in the Modern Dances.
Within the cloistered Precincts of
Doolittle College, which is on the
Shores of Lake Pasquaby, the Mem-
bers of the Faculty were anxiously
scanning the Registration and won-
dering if all the Good Friends of the
School were in Health or whether one
or two might pop off and leave enough
Coin to build a new Physics Lab and
an Assembly Hall.
At the very same time nearly all of
the Young Men were out at the Prac-
tice. Most of them were haggard
with Anxiety and the Brows were fur-
rowed like Wash Boards. They were
sizing up the Onions, hoping to dis-
cover among them an embryo “Red”
Grange. All of them were extremely em-
bryo but not one of them looked as
if he could take the Ball in any Di-
rection except by General Agreement.
So they cursed the Alumni for not dig-
ping up and sending in a lot of Giants
who lived on Red Meat and growled
like Police Dogs.
Doolittle had been getting along for
Years on half-portions of Hope. Every
September a few vagrant Expectations
would spring up in the Hearts of the
Faithful and it would be announced
that the Eleven was getting ready to
massacre the Normal School and
Patchmore Business College, to say
nothing of the State University. Be-
fore Thanksgiving the Hospital would
be fu$ of bunged-up Warriors, nursing
fractured Iambs and pitiful Alibis.
Where There Is Life There Is Hope.
Doolittle was too proud to play High
Schools and too puny to stop Truck
Horses who played in the Conference
and that is why the Trustees and
Others often had debated as to the
Wisdom of doing away with Intercol-
legiate Sports altogether and permit-
ting the Student Body to individually
acquire Courage and Strength by go-
ing into the Woods to hunt Botanical
Specimens.
Doolittle was sure in a Bad Way
when it began to talk about quitting
Cold on Football. Nobody ever heard of
an Institution getting ready to cut out
Athletics until after it had been boot-
ed all over the Lot and then heaved
over the Fence. Those who say they
are going to stop playing Football,
have not, as you might say, played it.
They have figured as Punching Bags,
and this Thing of being kicked in the
Face for the Glory of Alma Mater
while all the Rooters are weeping, is
one Job which can get to be awful te-
dious.
Notwithstanding which the Grads
and the Kids alike were for hanging
on. They figured that some Day a
Miracle might happen and the Heav-
ens would open, dropping down on
the Campus an End who would kick
the Egg a Mile, and two Halves who
were good for Ten Seconds in their
Suits, and two Ends who were always
on Top of the Ball instead of looking
in the Opposite Direction, and a Line
which would be a Stone Wall instead
of a Strip of Tissue Paper.
The wffiole Lay-Out didn’t look any
too Jake early this September when
the Squad lined up. To add to the
Horror of the Situation, on that very
day it was suggested to the Faculty
by Prof. Philo Guthrie, of the Depart-
ment of Umpscicology, that certain Lo-
cal Rules should be enforced, so as to
rob the Sport of all Roughness, Blood-
shed and Assault with Intent to Mur-
der.
The Suggestions embodied in the Res-
olution presented by Prof. Guthrie
are given in Detail herewith as they
are to be submitted to the Intercol-
legiate Association next Summer with
a very powerful Backing from the
Pacifist Element.
Nursery Football.
The first of the Guthrie Rules is
that no Student shall be permitted to
play on the Team unless he has stud-
ied so hard that he will be too weak
to hurt any one. Also, each Contest-
ant is required to wear bis Horn-Rim
Glasses, because, in nearly every
State, it is a double offense to soak a
man wearing Spectacles. If the Mem-
bers of the Opposing Team adopt Bru-
tal Tactics they can be arrested by
Constables and taken before a Justice
of the Peace and. while they are ab-
sent, the Home Team can score at
Will and Put the Game on Ice.
To avoid ail the scrambling and pil-
ing up, which so often results in
Bruises and Injuries, it is proposed by
Dr, Guthrie that, at the Opening of
Play, the Umpire shall think of a
Number between 1 and 50 and each of
the Captains shall guess at the Num-
ber and the one who makes the better
Guess shall be permitted to move the
Ball 10 Yards into the opposing Ter
ritory, and carefully place it on the
Ground without Interference.
After that, each Team shall desig-
nate a Player to step forward and an-
swer certain Questions regarding the
League of Nations, these Questions to
Knitted Fashions Tune to
By CHERIE NICHOLAS
HriF-' -.-mi
IBS
Sis
p»
Ipfc
lf|i§
VjATURE is glorifying the
autumn landscape with
no richer coloring than that
which fashion is lavishing on
the new knitted costumes.
Die browns, and, by the
way, special emphasis is
being placed on brown in the knitted
be previously prepared by a Joint Com-
mittee of Instructors, representing the
two schools. The Side giving the more
lucid and satisfactory Replies shall be
permitted to execute a Forward Pass
of 20 Yards ‘after the opposing Team
has retired to the Side-Lines.
Once more the Elevens line up in
the usual Formation and each Captain
shall count off his Men, using the fa-
miliar Verse:
Onery, Owery, ickery Ann!
Phileson, Pholeson, Nicholas John!
Queevy, Quay,
English navy,
Stinlilum, Stanklum, I-O-U Buck!
The Player who is pointed out on
the Word “Buck” shall then be known
as “It” and he shall face the Player
similarly selected by the Opposing
Team and try to stump him both in
Greek and Calculus. It shall be the
Duty of the Referee to name the Win-
ner in this Scholarship Contest. If the
Team given the Award already has
the Ball then the Player known as “It”
shall be permitted to plant the Ball
back of the Goal for a Touch Down.
If the opposing Team holds the Ball
then the Winner is given the Ball and
the other Team is penalized MO yards.
Taking the Kick Out of the Game.
In order to vary the Tactics and re-
tain some of the former Excitement,
the next Play shall be known as the
“Tag Play.” The Captain of the Team
holding the Ball shall order it given
to the Player who did not miss one
Recitation during the preceding Se-
mester. He will he given an Open
Field and Permitted to run with the
Ball, but if any opposing Player over-
takes him and slaps him on the Back
and says, “Tag,” he wifi lose the Ball
unless he has his Fingers crossed at
the time. If he has failed to cross
his Fingers, the Whole Thing counts
just the same as an Off-Side Play and
he can retain the Ball only by an-
swering three Psychology Questions
which may he propounded by any of
the opposing Players.
If any Player uses hard Language
or actually takes hold of any oppos-
ing Player he shall be retired and
put into a Compartment on the Side-
Lines known as the “Bone Yard” and
kept jthere until the Captain of his
Team answers 5 Questions in Chem-
istry, without laughing.
To avoid Confusion, it will be as-
sumed that each Touch Down is fol-
lowed by a successful Kick for Goal.
Upon resuming Play after a Touch
Down all of the Players, except the
two Full-Backs, shall join Hands In
a Circle and the two Full-Backs shall
be blindfolded and put into the Cen-
ter. While the Players are singing
“London Bridge is falling down,” the
Full-Back whose Team has been scored
against must catch the Full-Rack of
the other Team and call him by his
First Name within 30 seconds, In
which Case his Team will be given
the Ball in the Center of the Field.
Otherwise, the Ball goes to the Op-
posing Team on their own 20-Yard
Line.
And so on. All Spectators will be
required to remain absolutely Quiet
during the Mental Tests.
It must be explained that the Guth-
rie Revised Rules are still in the
Rough, but it will be seen that they
are going to debrutalize a very rough
Sport as soon as they are approved by
all of the Athletic Associations.
MORAL: To prevent overcrowding
a Stadium, make it Lady-Like.
Movement to Develop
Modern Farm Building
Evolution of modern farm building
types, especially adapted for the dif-
ferent regions of the country, is in
prospect as a result of the regional
farm - structure - planning movement
which his been inaugurated in the
corn belt this year, the United States
Department of Agriculture says.
The program, which will co-ordinate
the work of state agricultural engi-
neers in a specific region with the re-
search work done by the federal bu-
reau of agricultural engineering, will
also tend to eliminate the possible du-
plication of plans for farm buildings
which frequently takes place when
states work alone. The object is to
develop the types of farm structures
which are best suited for the region
in which they are used.
The movement to study farm struc-
tures on a regional basis is considered
a significant step in the efforts of the
agricultural engineers of the depart-
ment to work out a system for the In-
terchange of plans, specifications, and
other information about farm build-
ings, thus making the research in each
state available to all the others.
Last Occupied Land?
Polynesia was probably the last
habitable area to be occupied. The
Polynesians, although of similar fea-
tures, language, customs, religion and
traditions, are not a pure race. They
are supposed to be mainly of Aryan
origin, with infusions of other bloods,
and to have come from Asia by way of
the Malay peninsula and Java, and
thence from island to island by vari-
ous routes in their migration east-
ward, northward and southward and
to have reached Hawaii, probably
from Samoa, about A. D. 500.
Reading Speed
Six words per second, or about four
and one-half hours for a standard size
book, is good average reading speed,
and most people can aspire to reach
this seemingly extraordinary rapidity.
It is the brain, not the eye, which de-
termines the speed of reading. The
eye cannot move steadily, but must
move in a series of jerks, with pauses
between. These pauses are needed to
see the printed page clearly, but still
more to give time for the meaning t<
be grasped.
Justice Influenced by
Medicine Man’s Opinion
Trial by ordeal, with a cup of poi-
jon to determine the guilt or inno-
cence of a person accused of theft,
witchcraft or other crime, is still
prevalent among certain African
tribes. In the hall of African ethnol-
ogy at Field Museum of Natural His-
tory, Chicago, are exhibited examples
of the poison cup and the poisons used
in such trials as practiced by the
Ovimbundu people of West Africa.
It is said that the medicine man
secretly makes up his own mind in
advance of the trial as to the guilt
or innocence of the accused, and thus
controls the result, mixing his con-
coction of poisonous herbs to produce
the effect he desires to justify a cer-
tain verdict either way. If the ac-
cused suffers from the poison he is
adjudged guilty and is either allowed
to die of the poison itself or is beaten
to death, according to Wilifrid D.
Hambly, assistant curator of African
ethnology.
If he is Innocent this fact is es-
tablished by his stomach’s rejection
of the poison, and this may he
brought about by the medicine man
according to the mixture he admin-
isters. This is but one of a number
of similar ordeals used in the dis-
pensing of what the African tribes-
men must accept as justice.
Dog’s Brain Not Unlike
That of Average Child
The dog piles up his knowledge al-
most wholly by association of ideas,
especially pleasurable associations;
and ttiis comes very near to a percep-
tion of cause and effect, Sir W. Beach
Thomas write^ in the Atlantic
Monthly.
He'can learn up to about 100 words.
He can acquire a strong artistic sense
—that is, can tell fine shades of black
and gray, and distinguish a very
round ellipse from a circle. He can
distinguish both separate notes and
ranges of notes.
His brain matter behaves very much
as a child’s, especially in shutting off
attention from things that bore him
by their unintelligibility, and can so
concentrate on things that interest
him that all the rest of his mind, and
indeed, his other senses, are shut
down.
The study of the dog’s actual brain
has given concrete evidence of how
like it is to the mind of the child.
Though soon the human mind climbs
to heights that tower over the dog’s
attainment, its loss is permanent if it
misses the perceptions proper to it?
doglike infancy.
Eisteddfod Unique
Over a thousand years have elapsed
iince King Offa set up his famous
dyke for the purpose of keeping the
Welsh people in a state of rigid isola-
tion. Offa’s dyke still remains. In-
deed, in some places it is still of con-
siderable height. But the little race
which has been so long confined with-
in its shadows still cherishes its na-
tive tongue with an unabating devo-
tion.
The eisteddfod—the oldest of its dis-
tictive institutions—still flourishes un-
der the direction of its archdruid, and
has no parallel in any other country
on earth.—London Answers.
Jug-Like Hippopotamus
A huge earthenware jug, shaped like
A hippopotamus, was recently discov-
ered on the site of what was once the
city of Nuzi in Mesopotamia, and Is
believed to be at least three thousand
five hundred years old. Upon the spot
where this relic was found there once
existed a thriving community at a very
early date. In fact the region has
been called the “cradle of civilization.”
Within the area watered by the riv-
ers, there were fertile farmlands which
produced rich crops, and fertile mead-
ows. There were cities, too, in which
a thriving commerce was carried on,
Musical Conducting
Wagner founded modern conducting,
Writes Richard Capell in the London
Daily Mail. He wrote a little book on
the subject which is nearly all a rag-
ing denunciation of bad conductors,
but which lays down two principles:
The conductor’s business Is (1) to es-
tablish the right tempo and (2) to
bring out the melody. He also said,
“I do not beat the time, for that would
make for a stiff performance—I de-
scribe It in the air.” These sayings
really embrace almost the whole mat-
ter.
Olympic Winners Honored
While tiie present-day Olympic
games are modeled after the ancient
Greek games, there are important dif-
ferences. The Greek games were real-
ly religious festivals, dedicated to
Zeus, being manifestations of physi-
cal perfection, which the Greeks con-
sidered godlike. Therefore, winners
of the games became national herftes,
their praises were sung by the great-
est poets, statues were erected to per-
petuate their memory and, in- Allien?
they were pensioned for life.
Going “Scot Free”
“Scot” is a very old legal term em-
bracing tolls, or taxes, or assessments,
and a man was said to pay his scot
just as today we would speak of a
man paying his rates. Anyone not
called upon „o pay a certain toll or
tax was therefore spoken of as be
ingNscot free. The sense of this old
term has gradually expanded so that
now it is applied to the man who
avoids any payment or penalty, what-
ever its nature.
realm for early fall, the wine reds
and greens and golden hues which
radiate from the knitted mesh of the
new sweaters, suits, frocks and en-
sembles are in very counterpart of
the warm tones which glow in the
setting of an autumnal sun or in the
painting of the myriads of falling
leaves which are even now carpeting
the earth.
In making selection of the new knit-
ted outfit, the important role which
has been assigned lo brown is a point
well worth considering. So pro-
nounced is this Haig for brown that
even the shoes one wears with the
knitted costume are expected to be
in harmonious brown. The girl
seated in the picture is wearing new-
model brown kid oxfords with her
lacy knit brown dress, the same be-
ing distinguished with clever cutout
work at the sides.
The outstanding style points other
than its color in regard to the dress
are its long sleeves and, most im-
portant of all, its flattering yoke of
white crochet, the buttoned collar of
which stresses the high neckline which
is so essential to chie this season.
The novelty of this yoke bespeaks
the fact that it is not alone the color
glory of the newer knitted costumes
which is capturing all the honors for
when it comes to “ideas” their name
is legion. Here’s citing a few of them,
such as, for instance, the cunning
detachable capes which top many of
the recent incoming knitted frocks,
sweaters which are made suspender
FALL OUTFIT THAT
HAS ITS “APPEAL”
Knitted things have a new Impor-
tance this fall. Their materials are
firmer and they have a more tailored
quality than they have ever had in
the past.
There Is a new three-piece outfit
that’s stunning, with a skirt of un-
even check of diamond pattern in
black and white. The sweater is one
of the most interesting weaves I’ve
ever seen and you’d declare, as 1 did,
that it was hand-done. It’s white with
a touch of black, and black-ribbed
band at the hips and edging the el-
bow sleeves. The coat is seven-eighths
length, semi-fitted, with tailered lapels
and slit pockets, fastening at the waist
with link buttons. You couldn’t have
anything smarter for J:he street as well
as for the country, for early fall It
comes in other color combinations, too.
if you want something brighter.
The tweedy knit effects are espe-
cially good. One. in grayish tones,
with diagonal ribbing, has a skirt with
a bright green crush girdle of jersey
that fastens with two buckles. A
white sweater is knitted in self stripes
and has the new high neckline.—Kan-
sas City Times.
Felt and Feathers Will
Trim Fall Millinery
Some of the new felt hats are
trimmed with felt, many are trimmed
with velvet, and some feature feath-
er trimming.
One of the latter group has an
unusual bo\ placed on the edge of
the brim over one eye, made of a
hordeaux red leather the same
shade as the hat.
Another has a crown entirely cov-
ered with feathers. Rows placed to
the fore part of the hat. be it a
brimmed hal or a turban, are note-
worthy of the fall millinery.
Stripe* of All Kind*
Paris has taken to stripes with more
than a little enthusiasm and Roman
stripes, candy stripes, pin stripes and
bold zebra stripes are featured in
bright colors or two-toned effects In
summer clothes designed for the smart
resorts.
fashion to wear with lingerie guimpss.
and leg o’mutton sleeves, if you please,
and square neck and all sorts of
scarf manipulations. Then there is a
new alliance which calls for a suede
jacket with the knitted dress.
Yon will be interested, too, in the
perfectly lovely dresses which are
knitted of thinnest zephyr, or silk, if
you can afford it, done in Irish lace
pattern. There are no words to de-
scribe tlie chic and the charm of this
knitted fashion de luxe, so we will
leave it to imagination to picture or
better still go and look them up. They
are a revelation in knitted artistry.
And there’s the sweater! Don’t
forget sweaters. Not that you could,
if you would, for .sweaters feature
most spectacularly throughout knit-
ted sections this season, if you are
up and doing, you will be wearing a
“scrumptious” sweater blouse with
your new tweed or suede-like cloili
swagger suit this fall. Paris coutu-
riers are creating stunning outfits
consisting of jacket and shirt of cloth
with hand-crochet sweaters instead of
the usual blouse. The three piece
pictured to the right is typical. The
suit is made of black velvety cloth,
the jacket boasting a very gay lin-
ing. The jumper is hand crocheted
and observes all the new rules of the
fashion game, such as the square
neck, the to-the-wrist sleeves with
full top and the touch of bright col-
or which enlivens black these days—
the latter in this instance accom-
plished via embroidered designs done
in multi-toned angora yarn.
©. 1932. Western Newspaper Union.
BROWN AND WHITE
By CHEKIE NICHOLAS
Work out your color scheme for
your early fall coat or suit in brown
and white if you would keep pace
with fashion’s step. The model pic-
tured is a forerunner of coats to be
for the crisp autumn months. It ts
of Drown and white tweed and is
trimmed with brown and white fur.
The ensemtiling of this costume is
perfect from a color standpoint. The
little velvet toque is brown. The
fact that it is velvet is significant,
for most of the initial hats are just
such clever velvet fantasies as this.
The shoes also enter into the color
alliance. These sturdy brown kid ox
fords have a discreet design of liz-
ard across the throat. The low cuban
heels make the slioe practical for
autumn wuIks. They also assure com
fort during the shopping hours.
When Right of Command
Was Won by Washington
When George Washington rode into
Philadelphia on February 8, 1756, ac-
companied by his aide, Captain Mer-
cer, he lacked some days of being
twenty-four years old; but already he
was a personage and important enough
to have his visit mentioned iD the fol-
lowing week’s issue of the Pennsyl-
vania Gazette,
He was on his way to Boston to con-
fer with General Shirley, that the lat-
ter might determine the right of com-
mand between himself and Captain
Dagworthy, who acted on a commis-
sion of the governor of Maryland. It
was decided by the commander in
chief of the British forces in America
that Colonel Washington, as a provin-
cial field officer, would be in command
at Fort Cumberland. That decision
gave him the supreme satisfaction of
having his contention ratified by au-
thority.
A long and expensive journey was
required to settle this disagreement,
but Washington footed the bills for
his aide and himself and appears to
have enjoyed his sojourns in Phila-
delphia, New York and Boston.—Phil*
| adelphia Ledger.
“Kit” Carson More Than
Average Hardy Pioneer
Christopher (“Kit”) Carson was
born in Madison county, Kentucky, on
the day before Christmas in 1809.
While he was a baby the family moved
to Howard county, Missouri, and he
became inured from his cradle days to
the pioneer perils and privations. He
grew up as a hunter and trapper, and
at the age of twenty-four was ap-
pointed hunter to Bent’s fort, where
he remained'for eight years and was
then engaged as a guide by Fremont
in his expedition across the plains and
over the mountains.
In 1847 Carson was sent to Wash-
ington with dispatches and received
an appointment as lieutenant of
United States rifles. In 1853 he drove
6,500 sheep over the mountains to
California, and on his return to Toas
was appointed Indian agent in New
Mexico. He was the means of bring-
ing about a number of important
treaties between the government and
the Indians. During the Civil war he
was breveted a brigadier general, and
rendered good service to the govern-
ment in the Indian territory. He died
at Fort Lyon, Colo., May 23, 1868.
All Are “Jugulars”
Children in the vicinity of Forty-
Ainth street -and Wentworth avegpue
were playing croquet.
One hoy stood apart from the group
and deftly kept three of the wooden
balls in the air. The game was for-
gotten as admiring youngsters crowd-
ed about the young juggler.
“Say, you really know how to do
that,” one of the group remarked, with
open mouth. “How did you learn to
do it?”
“Oh, I guess I just inherited it,” the
boy said, still keeping the three halls
in the air, “there’s a jugular vein
in every member of my family.”—la»
dianapolis News.
Highly Important Senses
Books on physiology speak of the
tery intimate relation between smell-
ing and tasting. Flint’s Physiology
says that “In the appreciation of deli-
cate {shades of flavor, It is well known
that olfaction (smell) plays so Im-
portant a part that it can hardly be
separated from gustation (taste). It
is undoubtedly true that the delicacy
of the sense of taste is Impaired when
the sense of smell Is lost. The expe-
riment of tasting wines blindfolded
and with the nostrils plugged, and the
partial loss of taste during a severe
croyza (cold In the head) are suffi-
ciently familiar Illustrations of this,’*
Ocean Depths Explored
Bottles that seal themselves four
Allies below the surface of the Pa-
cific, thermometers that record deep
sea temperatures and fish living in
black bottles reveal to scientists many
odd facts of the sea. At the Univer-
sity of California’s Institute of Ocean-
ography a group of scientists are
plumbing the ocean’s depths trying to
learn why the ocean is saltier in some
areas thaD in others and what goes on
at the bottom of the sea.
Fish nearly black and others trans-
parent have been brought up from the
depths.
Half-Masting the Flag
The custom of flying the flag at half-
mast is said to have arisen out Of the
old naval and military custom of low-
ering the flag in time of war as a sign
of submission. The vanquisher always
lowered his flag- while the victor flut-
tered his own flag above it from the
same staff. To lower a flag therefore
was a sign of respect for one’s supe-
rior, and a sign of mourning aod re-
spect. It Is said that in the Seven-
teenth century Spanish ships dis-
played a flag at half mast as a sig-
nal of distress.
Basis for Old Relief
Popular belief that the fertility of
the soil is increased in spots where
lightwing strikes probably has some
scientific basis, says Pathfinder Mag-
azine. The electrical shock may have
an effect in rendering the minerals**in
the soil more soluble and making the
elements of fertility more available to
plants. This tielief is only distantly
related to another one, namely, that
lightning fixes nitrogen and that the
general soil fertility is improved
chrough this fixation.
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The Lampasas Daily Leader (Lampasas, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 181, Ed. 1 Tuesday, October 4, 1932, newspaper, October 4, 1932; Lampasas, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth894319/m1/3/: accessed July 7, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Lampasas Public Library.