The Lampasas Daily Leader (Lampasas, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 295, Ed. 1 Friday, February 17, 1933 Page: 2 of 4
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THE LAMPASAS LEADER
The Fable of Riding
the Skyrocket
88
By GEORGE ADE
©. Bell Syndicate.—WNU Service.
NCE there was a Man who
I I played safe. He preferred to
y J not lay down a bet unless the
Odds were approximately 1,000
„ to 1 in his Favor. Before he tackled
any Proposition he liked to gaze at it
from all Angles and get the outward
Aspects and inside Dope.
All of that Bunk about “Nothing
venture, Nothing gain” had not been
in his Copy Book but he remembered
a luminous Page devoted to “Be sure
you’re Right and then go into the
High.”
Mr. Dawdell had always been cau-
tious that way. Fie was not an am-
bitious Explorer, a reckless Experi-
menter or an intrepid Pioneer For
instance, he didn’t go in for any new-
fangled Didoes until they were five
or six Years old and had been thor-
oughly tested and approved by all the
Neighbors.
He never bought a Bicycle until aft-
er Autos came in. He wanted to be
sure that they were safe to use and
would stand the Wear and Tear.
Up to last Fall he wore a Derby.
He didn’t want to buy the Soft Kind
until certain that the Fedora was more
than a transitory Fad.
His Excuse for wearing Detachable
Cuffs is that the Style may change
back at any time from Attached Cuffs
to Detachable Cuffs and if it does he
wants to have a lot of Detachable
Cuffs all ready to wear. Here we
have a Brand of Intelligence often en-
countered but seldom understood and
appreciated.
Once he served on a Jury and held
up the Verdict for Two Days because
he "felt sure that all of the Witnesses
on Both Sides had perjured Them-
selves, consequently he was not In pos-
session of any accurate Information
upon which to base a definite Con-
clusion.
Hatching Out His Roll.
The only Reason he is alive now
is that so many Drivers are good
Dodgers because, when M"r. Dawdell
gets out into the Street and It becomes
a Question as to whether he shall hur-
ry on across or beat it back to the
Sidewalk, that is a Problem which
cannot be settled offhand. He has to
get out a Pencil and a Pad of Paper
and work on it for quite a While.
Possibly you have heard of his fa-
mous Wager. On a certain Wednes-
day he laid Odds of 2 to 1 that the
next Day would be Thursday but that
Evening he heard a Rumor that the
World was coming to an End, so at
II :30 P. M. he hedged.
Even from this Blue Print you may
be able to corral a correct Line on
Mr. Dawdell, otherwise known as
Safety First. All he wanted at any
time was a lead-pipe Cinch which did
not involve any Element of Risk.
The Bull Market and the Real Es-
tate Boom were simply made to Or-
der for Birds of his general Descrip-
tion, it being a well-known zoological
Fact that the Village Miser who is
afraid to put any Coin into the Build-
ing and I^oan will always go to the
County Fair and fall for the Shell
Game.
It is the Concern promising Ten Per
Cent a Month that brings all of that
mildewed Money out of the Stockings.
To the Sure-Thingers all that is Real
looks Counterfeit whereas the Phonies
seem to be not only plausible but ab-
solutely gilt-edged.
Mr. Dawdell had pinched out a
Bank Roll and he was sitting on it to
keep it warm. He was waiting for a
Chance to double his Money over
Night but he didn’t’ propose to rush
into any speculative Deal until’he
knew that it was air-tight, sound and
guaranteed. In the meantime he was
watching the Stock Market and the
Guardian Angel supposed to take care
of Suckers was on a Vacation.
Everything had been going up and
up. He watched the Ticker and the
Black Board and the Newspaper Quo-
tations and he could not refrain from
making Mind Bets.
All Set for a Killing.
As, for instance, if he had bought
1,000 Shares of Milk Can Preferred
on July 1st and held it until Septem-
ber 15th, he would have cleared
enough to permit him to take on 5,000
Shares of Bohunkus Steel Coil Com-
mon at the Low Point and hold it un-
til just before the Holidays and then,
by slapping all of the Velvet into Gil-
hool-ey Oil, Gas and Vapor he could
have closed out early in February,
just before the Break, with a total
Profit of, say $630,000, or in Round
Numbers $650,000, if not more. Mak-
ing the Whole Thing well worth his
time.
The only Reason in the World that
he hadn’t Played his Hunches and
cleaned up a Ton of Jack was that
he wanted to watch the Market for a
considerable Period of Time and make
sure that the Bull Movement was to
be continuous and perpetual Instead
of a Spasmodic Reaction to certain
evanescent Conditions, if you know
what that means. If you don’t, the
Author will be unable to give you any
Help.
Well, the upward Trend had been so
continuous that even Mr. Dawdell
finally knew that the Psychological
Moment had arrived and that every-
thing was set for a Killing. As near-
ly as he could learn Every One Else
in tho World had been loading it Into
Truckn and carting it away and now
It was Time for him to get His.
Ribbed Velvet for High-Style Coats
By CHERIE NICHOLAS
So he conferred with some of those
wise Insiders who did not know how
to talk above a Whisper. They were
shrewd Tipsters who got all of the
good Information within a Day or two
after it came out in the Newspapers.
They asked Mr. Dawdell if he had
come in Contact with the Rumor that
the Inert Motor Co. intended to dou-
ble Production, Declare a Stock Divi-
dend, absorb the Dinkus Interests and
close a Ten Year Contract with the
Bazlnsky Factory.
No, it seemed that Mr. Dawdell had
not succeeded in dreaming any of
these Pipe Dreams, but they were
right in Line with the general Opti-
mism of the Market and helped to
confirm his Belief that Inert Motors
would continue to jump, possibly for
Years to come.
On the very Day on which he de-
cided to set in his Stack, about 10,000
other cautious Gamblers, every one of
whom had a Head shaped exactly like
the Citrus Growth, which was bal-
anced on Mr. Dawdell’s Shoulders, ar-
rived at the same Conclusion by the
Exercise of the same kind of Almost-
Reasoning Powers.
An Expensive Wait.
There comes a Time in every spec-
tacular Orgy of Inflation when a vast
Flock of Lambs appears on the High-
way, capering gaily and bleating in
unison as it heads for the Slaughter
House. The Appearance on the Scene
of these innocent and trusting B’auna
is always a Cue for the Thimble-Rig-
gers, Manipulators, Banditti, Second-
Story Men and Yeggs, who are car-
rying big Lines which cost practically
Nothing, to slip the Green Goods to
the Yokels, get from under and hot-
foot to the Woods with the Swag.
The Idea being to Cop while the Cop-
ping is good.
How happy were all of those eager
Doodle Bugs when they learned that
they could still purchase some of the
desirable Stock! They took it as rap-
idly as the polite and respectable Bur-
glars could shovel it out to them.
Came a Day when those who had
once Owned the beautiful lithographed
Certificates were in the dreamy South-
land listening to cracked Ice, raving
Promoters and moaning Jazz, while
the would-be Wallingfords were in
their respective Cellars counting the
Lumps of Coal and wondering if there
would be plenty of Reading Matter at
the Poor House.
When the Dirigible exploded and
the light-hearted Passengers were
strewn all over the Landscape, it was
then that Mr. Dawdell, following his
usual deliberate Methods, refused to
believe what he had seen until there
had been more or less Corroboration.
After the Stock dropped about two
Miles and the Parachute refused to
open, Mr. Dawdell, ever controlled by
an Instinctive Caution, said to him-
self, “This may be just a temporary
Slump, so I had better not do any-
thing rash now or I may regret it
Week after next.”
He decided to watch the Market for
a couple of Months and then, if there
was no Recovery, he would know for
sure that the Bears had control of the
Situation and it would be time to duck
and, afterward,- take a Lead Pencil
and figure how he stood, if at all.
So he carefully avoided any head-
long or hasty Procedure, waiting until
Inert Motors had tobogganed from 181
to 64 before sending Word to the
Broker.
He is now saving up another Roll,
but when he gets it he is going to be
more careful and not go against any
Game of Chance unless he has a sure-
fire System.
MORAL: If you want to buy Some-
thing and Somebody Else Is willing
to sell it to you, look out!
U. S. May Adopt One More
Hardwoods From Over-Seas
Immigration to the United States
States has not been limited to people
but has extended to trees as well, ac-
cording to J. A. Cope of the depart-
ment of forestry at Cornell univer-
sity. Three important European
cone-bearers have already taken a
prominent place in the American for-
est of the future.
Norway spruce is a native of Eu-
rope and is a dominant part of the
forest landscape of the highlands and
lower mountain slopes of central Eu-
rope. Scotch pine, which has been used
exclusively for reforestation work In
New York state, is not a native of
Scotland but is found in vast areas
in Prussia and Scandinavia. The im-
ported Scotch pine sheds snow better
than the native kinds, he says. Euro-
pean larch is also largely used in New
York state. It is extremely fast grow-
ing. The greatest volume of timber
growing on an acre of land in all
Europe is a stand of larch planted 240
years ago, located in southeast Fin-
land.
Professor Cope predicts that more
important hardwood may be added to
the list of imported trees from Europe.
The European beech, he says, Is faster
growing, more decay resistant, has
better form and habit, and its lumber
commands a far higher price than that
from the American beech.
The Educated One
There are four requisites of the edu-
cated man. He must know the gen-
eral history of the world, the history
of human Ideas, one science, one lan-
guage—preferably his own. Yet even
with these essentials somewhere safe
In the back of his head, a man might
remain half educated.
Without humility we are uneducated.
To become perfectly educated is Im-
possible, but to try to become edu-
cated is education—as nearly perfect
education as anyone can have. The
well-educated man tries to know some
thina about himself and others.
Howe About:
Giving Good Advice1
War
Those Who Paid
By ED HOWE
"V TEW' York people have laughed
IN at us farmers a long time because
of our mortgages. O. O. McIntyre, a
farmer from Missouri, is now in New
York, looking up the records there, and
has discovered so far that every build-
ing on Fifth avenue is mortgaged, ex-
cept St. Patrick’s cathedral and Tif-
-fany’s jewelry store.
The only rich man I know now re-
cently called on me; he used to work
in my shop for eight dollars a week,
and I recall thinking occasionally it
was too much. He is at present get-
ting fifty dollars a week in the me-
chanical department of a big town
newspaper.
Flis aim in calling on me was to get
help in saving his little home. A build-
ing association has a small mortgage
on it, and it obligates my friend to pay
thirty dollars a month through a term
of years, such payment to include his
rent and a gradual reduction of the
principal sum.
“Joe, I have long known you to be
a good worker and an honest man,” I
said to him. “Do you mean to tell me
that with wages of fifty dollars a week
continuing over eight years, you have
not been able to pay thirty dollars a
month rent, when this sum included
six dollars to apply on your mort-
gage?”
Fie thought awhile before answering,
as men do when stumped, anl I no-
ticed that look of despair I have so
often seen lately on the faces of other
good men and good fellows. »
“Well,” he answered finally, “I
didn’t.”
Many a good man has made the
same reply, when he knew he was to
blame; I have been guilty so often my-
self I hadn’t the heart to say anything
further, although I did ask him if he
had never heard of the old advice to
steadily save something for a rainy
day.
“Yes,” he replied, “I was brought up
on it; mother always fussed at father
about that, and I buried him.”
It’s another American tragedy; I
don’t know what to do about it.
There was excuse after excuse in
this good man’s case; for one .thing,
he had four daughters, and loved them
devotedly, for they were good girls,
and three of them married shiftless
husbands. Still, excuses are usually
urged for neglected duty; some of
them are eloquent, and true enough,
but they don’t count much when a
mortgage is due.
* * *
I have often wondered what would
have happened had Woodrow Wilson
been a brave and true man before he
entered the World war, and said: “We
have not sufficient cause to engage in
this conflict, which will cost us billions
in money, and hundreds of thousands
of tragical deaths. There has been
popular expression on the question;
the people elected me President be-
cause I kept them out of it. I will re-
sign, but I will not enter the war in
response to clamor of a mistaken mi-
nority.”
Probably there would have been so
much indignation from the mistaken
that Mr. Wilson would have resigned:
probably his successor would have
plunged in.
But today Woodrow Wilson’s mem-
ory would have been blessed by the
majority as the memory of no Presi-
dent has been blessed in the history of
the Republic.
In the early sixties Dr. Oliver Wen-
dell Holmes, while sitting in his home
in Boston, received a telegram saying
his son had been shot through the neck
at the battle of Antietam. The dis-
tressed father at once started for the
battlefield.
The Atlantic reprints an account of
the journey Doctor Holmes wrote
while its events were fresh in his mem-
ory, and the horrors of war have never
been more powerfully depicted. He
walked through many hospitals look-
ing for his son; inspected many wag-
ons carrying dead and wounded;
talked with soldiers who had buried
unknown dead in long trenches like
cattle; met other frantic fathers who
were looking for dead or mangled
sons; saw the wreck of the battlefield;
heard the screams of wounded; wept
at sight of thousands of good-looking
boy soldiers horribly mangled.
All through my reading of the story
I kept thinking. And the people who
fought and paid for the war never
wanted it, never asked for it; it was
ordered by a few men who never suf-
fered: some of whom profited by the
carnage. Out of this unnecessary
fighting came Abraham Lincoln, who
was never in a battle, lost no sons;
Lincoln as President issued the first
call for troops.
* * * *
Probably no man ever had a friend
he did not hate a little; we are all so
constituted by nature no one can pos-
sibly entirely approve of us.
* * *
I greatly admire the better class
scientists, for this reason: There 'is
no such thing as a first-class man of
science who wishes to fool anyone;
his ambition is to learn, and, through
learning, make life more endurable.
These men are the one class who al-
ways wish to tell the truth; who al-
ways believe honesty is the best pol-
icy. Statesmen, writers, doctors,
preachers, lawyers, business men, oc
casionally wish to fool us, but the
scientists never do; honesty is their
trade.
©, 1933, Bell Syndicate.—WNU Service,
O IBBED velvet for the midseason
^ and early spring coat is a style
suggestion which should prove par-
ticularly good news to the woman who
covets distinction in dress. Th
haute monde in Paris are all en-
thusiastic when it comes to this hand-
some material, while the best shops
here are displaying new coats and
suits made of it in both dark and light
colors.
When signs of spring stir within a
desire to discard one’s cumbersome
fur coat, comes the problem of a
timely substitute which shall measure
up in chic appearance to its worthy
predecessor. The coats pictured give
a highly satisfactory answer to the
question. Ribbed silk velvet fashions
each of them. Notice how the strips
or ribs are worked for the model
shown to the left. In the body of the
coat the ribs run vertically, thus con-
trasting the horizontal.direction of the
sleeves. The scarf collar takes a di-
agonal movement. An interesting
item in connection with this soft-tied
collar is that it is attached to the beige
wool dress underneath, for this model
is really an ensemble costume. This
same coat worn with one of the now
so-fashionable separate or removable
fur neckpieces makes an ideal wrap
with most any gown for midseason
wear.
This idea of working the stripes or
CHECK WITH PLAIN
By CHERIE NICHOLAS
Here’s how they are combining
check with plain this season. The pic-
ture happens to be of a beach costume
and is therefore made up of washable
materials. However; the rule holds
good for the newest spring suits which
have their swagger coats lined with
checked silk adding jaunty scarfs of
the check. One piece dresses with
bodice or yoke tops of check or plaid
are also good style. These often have
soft tie fastenings of self material.
Hand Knitted Effects Are
Chic for,All Sports Wear
Hand-knitted effects are enormously
chic for all sports clothes, with the
simulated patterns running a close sec-
ond in popular esteem . . . rusty
reds and browns, rich browns and cop-
per colors and some stunning burnt
orange shades are new and cheerful
under dark top coats.
ribs of the velvet in a designful way
is stressed throughout the garments
which are fashioned of this swagger
material. One is especially im-
pressed with this when it comes to ob-
serving the high-style resort apparel
which the better shops are now dis-
playing. Some perfectly ravishing
■little sports coats are shown with the
most unique yokes and pockets, like-
wise belts, tabs, flaps, scarfs and
cuffs which make a play on maneuver-
ing the ribs of the velvet in in-
genious effects by contrasting verticals,
horizontals and diagonals.
String color, beige and various
tones of gray are favorite colors for
these resort coats, which later on will
feature for wraps to wear over one’s
summer dresses. Even more alluring
are the sports coats which are made
of white ribbed velvet. Of course
these are strictly tailored, their only
trimming feature being conspicuously
large buttons.
In the opinion of leading French
style leaders white ribbed silk velvet
qualifies as a superb material for the
formal evening gown. Just so you
may see how effectively it is handled
we include a tiny sketch in the illus-
tration of an evening gown which
Maggie Rouff creates of white ribbed
velour. The sleeves are unique in
that they are fashioned of white silk
floss to simulate soft feathers.
©, 1933, Western Newspaper Union.
NEW SPRING MODELS
NOW BEING SHOWN
The Worth mid-season collection
hints at spring fashion’s trend and
introduces a new range of colors,
but principally combinations of beige,
gray, sand, black and white in a de-
lightful manner.
Aside from the fur trimmed long
coats and suits shown at this time,
Worth has shown a number of models
which will have a decided influence
on spring fashions. These are the
flaring shoulder capes, worn over light
wool or crinkly crepe frocks with fur
around the bottom.
“Fontainebleau,” a black and white
crepe satin afternoon ensemble, is al-
ready a favorite with Parisian clients.
Its bodice of draped white satin, with
its curiously shaped puffed and shirred
short sleeves of the black, matching
the simply cut skirt offer a smart aft-
ernoon costume, suitable for many oc-
casions.
A brownish beige woolen costume
consists of a simple sports dress and
jacket with cape sleeves, the distin-
guishing feature of which is its trim-
ming of stitching. It is called
“Evreeux” and is particularly young
and charming.
Bustles Are Back Again,
but in Pleats and Folds
The younger generation will have
to run to the dictionary, for the
“bustle” is back. It was to have been
expected, after the return of the Em-
press Eugenie hats a few months ago
and the leg-o’-mutton sleeves.
Madame Schiaparelli is the culprit
for she stepped in where other style
creators feared to tread and put
bustles back where they once were
flouted. Hers are not the same old
mattress-like fillers of horsehair and
canvas; she makes her bustles out of
pleats and folds.
Dress Designers Return
to Fringe for Trimming
Fringe is in again For evening
it borders capes, capelet sleeves and
scarf ends. For daytime it. border-
round collars. It always* matches thf
color to which it is joined and blach
fringe or black and white on white
are the colors most frequently used
Now I Broke Into
[TheMovies| i
Copyright by Hal C. Herman
By NANCY CARROLL
T REALLY kicked my way into the
A movies—both kinds of kicks, the
kind you register to music, and the
kind you register without music.
When I was a child, I had plenty of
opportunity to practice as there were
twelve children in our family. One
day my sister and I heard that one of
the Loew theaters on the East side in
New York was having a dancing con-
test for local talent. We decided to
enter and try our luck as we both
could kick over our heads then.
When we reached the theater, we
confessed that we were from the West
side of the city, but they let us enter
anyway. Much to our surprise, for
we were a little nervous at our first
attempts before the footlights of a big
theater—we won.
Our first big show after this was the
“Passing Show of 1923.” Here I did
a specialty number, but in one of the
numbers I failed to kick as I had to
hang from a chandelier. Within four
weeks I was offered the leading role,
opposite James Hall.
The show made ready to go on the
road, and so did I, but my mother,
who opposed my being on the stage,
refused to let me go on the road. So
I left this company and went into
"Topics of 1923.” Later I did a spe-
cialty number with the “Passing Show
1924,” and after that I had a prom-
inent part in “Mayflowers,” kicking all
the time, but to music, of course.
Then I had a chance to come West.
I did not kick at that, though. My
first part on the west coast was with
“Nancy.” In my next two shows, I
had plenty of kicks for they were the
“Music Box Revue” with Luplno Lane
and the “Music Box” with Fannie
Brice.
After that I starred in “Loose
Ankles,” which toured the Pacific
coast. Then came the leading role in
“Chicago,” which was produced in Los
Angeles.
Ever since I first arrived on the
west coast, I had wanted to go into
Nancy Carroll.
pictures. I finally submitted some
tests to William Fox and was given
the secondary lead in “Ladies Must
Dress.”
After I made that picture, I called
at the Paramount studio in Hollywood
one noon to keep a luncheon appoint-
ment with a friend of mine employed
there. The guardian at the door re-
fused to let me in. I had my appoint-
ment and I meant to keep it. I didn’t
see why he should not let me in, so I
registered a big kick and without
music, too. You see, I’m Irish and
have red hair, too, so that all helped,
I guess.
Anyway, when I was in the middle
of the big argument, I was interrupted
by Miss Anne Nichols, author of
“Abie’s Irish Rose.” She had been
passing through the foyer and stopped
to see what the excitement was about.
Well, I did get past that door guardian
in the end, only I did not go to meet
my friend. I went with Miss Nichols
Into her office.
She told me that I was just the
type for Rosemary in her play which
was to be filmed.
So you see, I did kick my way into
the movies. My musical show kicks
helped me to get into drama and
that helped me into the movies. Plus,
the musicaless kick, last of all.
Some Old Rocks
The Highlanders of the western
coasts of Scotland have a short prov-
erb: “New boat—old rocks.” Do not
suppose that as you in your turn essay
the dangerous voyage of life you can
afford to disregard the long experience
of mankind. Be sure that, as Cole-
ridge said, “Not without celestial ob-
servation can ever terrestrial charts
be accurately constructed.”—Henley
Henson.
Scots War on Thistle
War on the national flower and em-
blem of Scotland Is being waged in
that country. The thistle has been so
prolific this year that it is becoming
a menace to farmers, especially along
the border. Small prizes were offered
to school children who brought in the
largest number of thistles, and one girl
gathered 5,000 plants.
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The Lampasas Daily Leader (Lampasas, Tex.), Vol. 29, No. 295, Ed. 1 Friday, February 17, 1933, newspaper, February 17, 1933; Lampasas, Texas. (https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth895062/m1/2/: accessed July 2, 2024), University of North Texas Libraries, The Portal to Texas History, https://texashistory.unt.edu.; crediting Lampasas Public Library.